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  • [sad music]

  • [all crying softly]

  • - She looks so perfect.

  • - Yeah, you'd barely even know her intestines

  • were splattered all over the asphalt.

  • - They did a great job packing them all back in.

  • - Mads, you'll always be one of us.

  • Just because you're dead

  • doesn't mean I won't stop busting your balls.

  • - That's exactly why you should stop.

  • - Lori, have some respect.

  • Now she just looks stupid!

  • [crying continues] - He's right.

  • I can't go half mustache.

  • - Mads, you--you're--

  • - I'm a ghost, bitches.

  • [all screaming]

  • [playful music]

  • - [man singing] This is America

  • Land of dreams

  • Everyone can climb higher

  • - [women singing] Not you, though

  • You're stuck here

  • 'Cause you're a part-timer, yeah

  • - [man singing] You can do anything

  • - [woman singing] As long as it's not hard

  • - [man singing] And you can go anywhere

  • - [woman singing] As soon as you get a car

  • - [man singing] You're gonna be a huge success

  • - [woman singing] Come on, that's not who you are

  • - [man singing] You're a part-timer cursed

  • With full-time dreams

  • And this low-paying job is as bad as it seems

  • Bad as it seems

  • What the [bleep] are you doing here?

  • Whoa

  • What the [bleep] are you doing here?

  • Oh~

  • Seriously, dude? - Like, what the [bleep]?

  • Part Timers Season II - Episode 20

  • [all screaming]

  • - Guys, guys, why are we screaming?

  • - Ghost Mads and her brain from hell

  • are standing right there!

  • - I don't see anything.

  • [all shouting]

  • - She's waving at you. - Oh, my God.

  • [whispering] I can't see dead people.

  • - Mads, if only you just fell off the building

  • and not also got ran over.

  • Oh, why, oh, why does Pork E. Pine's

  • have to be next to a car wash?

  • - Pete, don't worry.

  • Dying really wasn't all that bad.

  • You know that feeling of peeing in a wet suit--

  • warm, cozy, you know you shouldn't be doing it,

  • but it feels so good?

  • all: Oh, yeah, - It does feel really nice.

  • - That's dying, in a nutshell.

  • Plus, now I have a supernatural power.

  • [magical tone] all: Aah!

  • - Wait. That's it?

  • You're a ghost and all you can do is make us do the wave?

  • - I'm working on it.

  • - Yeah, I got to say, that's pretty lame.

  • I was expecting way more than that.

  • - You know what else is lame?

  • Having a nice death and ending up back at Pork E. Pine's.

  • - If it's any consolation,

  • I'm glad you're here.

  • - Thanks, Pete.

  • - Can someone keep Dinger up to speed?

  • - Lost cause.

  • - You know, being stuck at my part-time job

  • was not my idea of the afterlife.

  • It wasn't even my idea of life-life.

  • - Maybe you're here because you have some unfinished business.

  • - Yeah, was there anything you wanted to do

  • while you were alive and didn't have a chance?

  • - [scoffs] Ah. Duh.

  • I never had sex with Pete.

  • all: Oh!

  • - You want me to release your soul

  • into all eternity using only my penis?

  • - Well, not only. Ever heard of foreplay?

  • - I've never even had sex with a living woman.

  • This is too much pressure. - Pete, calm down.

  • It's a totally natural rite of passage.

  • - "Natural"? It's necrophilia.

  • - No, no, no, that's if you had sex with my corpse.

  • This is totally different.

  • What we're talking about is ghost sex

  • with a ghost vagina.

  • It would be like having sex with a Jacuzzi jet.

  • - [sighs] Mads, I'm a virgin.

  • I've had relations with my fair share

  • of Jacuzzi jets...

  • but I just can't.

  • I'm sorry.

  • [sighs]

  • - [sighs]

  • Ella.

  • [magical tones]

  • - Where's Mads? - Don't tell him.

  • - Food counter. - Okay.

  • - I need you to help me seduce Pete.

  • - Uh, no. Sorry.

  • I'm not having another threesome.

  • If I learned one thing from the commune,

  • it's that you always want to stick with an even number.

  • - Did I get her? I think I got her.

  • - Keep trying, buddy. - Damn it.

  • - No, I don't want a threesome.

  • I just need some simple seduction advice.

  • How can I make myself irresistible to Pete?

  • - Oh, easy. Just talk about the sex moves

  • you're gonna do to him.

  • It'll make him less nervous. - Okay.

  • Well, I know one. - Mm, lay it on me.

  • - Okay, well, he's on top...

  • - Oh.

  • - And I'm on the bottom.

  • - Yeah.

  • - And then we make eye contact.

  • - Oh, so you like it like a nun?

  • - [sighs] This is why I need your help.

  • I need one of your signature moves.

  • - Okay, in your situation,

  • I'd probably go with a move I invented

  • called "the ouija board."

  • I won't go into too many details,

  • but let me just say, you'll be light as a feather.

  • He'll be stiff as a board.

  • - [laughs] Oh.

  • I get it.

  • - Ah, do you?

  • - Actually, no. I need details.

  • - Okay, so it starts with, you lay a piece of plywood...

  • [vacuum whirring loudly]

  • [continues indistinctly]

  • Slap him! Slap him! Slap him!

  • [continues indistinctly]

  • Fear in his eyes!

  • [continues indistinctly]

  • And if you didn't mush the banana,

  • you can eat it afterwards.

  • - Hmm. - I got her.

  • I got her, right?

  • [magical tone] Aah!

  • Aah! [both laughing]

  • [magical tone] - Hey.

  • - Oh! Oh! God!

  • - I know you're nervous about... you know.

  • But I talked to Ella, and she taught me a move

  • that will take it to a whole other level.

  • - Yeah, um, I've been thinking.

  • It's not really the lovemaking that I'm nervous about.

  • - It's not? - No.

  • It's pretty much

  • all I've been thinking about since I met you.

  • It's just that...

  • if we have sex

  • and you move on...

  • I won't ever see you again.

  • - But if we don't, I'll be trapped at Pork E. Pine's

  • for the rest of eternity.

  • - That seems fun, right?

  • You can be, like, my ghost girlfriend.

  • - Pete, could you imagine being trapped here forever?

  • It makes me want to kill myself, and I'm already dead.

  • If you love me, you'll bone me...

  • and set me free.

  • - Okay. We'll do it.

  • - Oh! Thanks, Pete!

  • Meet me in the staff room. I'm gonna go grab a banana.

  • [magical tone] He said yes!

  • - Aah!

  • Aw. I'm so happy for you.

  • [sighs] So I guess this is it for reals, huh?

  • Promise me you'll haunt my dreams.

  • - If that's how it works, then, yes.

  • I'm still figuring it out.

  • - [sighs] Rest in peace.

  • I love you.

  • - I love you too.

  • - Guys! Come say bye to Mads!

  • She's about to ghost-bust a nut!

  • Who you gonna call? - Ghostbust-nutters!

  • [chuckles] Ow.

  • - Mads, I'm really gonna miss you.

  • You were the best at cleaning up gum off the bottom of tables.

  • - Aw, thanks.

  • I thought nobody noticed.

  • - Mads, I know we haven't always gotten along.

  • - Is that it? - Yeah.

  • - Ian, I can always count on you to underwhelm.

  • - Aw. You're underwhelm-come.

  • - [crying]

  • - Lori, it'll be okay.

  • - No, it won't.

  • You're the only employee who actually did her job.

  • [sniffles]

  • - Mads, I'm really gonna miss you.

  • Hey, guys...

  • I can feel her.

  • - Nope. - Damn it.

  • - Dinger, I really want to say that I'll miss you the most.

  • But I'd be lying?

  • [all shouting] - Roasted!

  • - [laughing] Good one, Mads.

  • - Oh, you heard her. What'd she say?

  • - God damn it. -Um-hum

  • - Oh. Ow!

  • I don't think you know your supernatural strength.

  • - Shut up and ghost-French-kiss me.

  • I can't wait to haunt Little Pete.

  • Oh, I was wrong-- Big Pete.

  • - Okay, just... - Here...

  • - I got this. - Okay.

  • - Whew.

  • I can't believe this is gonna happen.

  • Oh, it's finally happening.

  • [both moan]

  • [groans]

  • It happened. - What?

  • - Did it...

  • happen for you?

  • - No. - Oh.

  • - Believe me, you'll know when it does.

  • Besides, I'm pretty sure I'm stuck here until that happens.

  • So want to try again?

  • - Okay. I think I'm in.

  • - Right, but you have to keep going.

  • - Okay.

  • [groans] Oh, no.

  • - Pete. - Sorry.

  • This time, I'm gonna wait until you're ready.

  • - Okay.

  • - Whoa!

  • What you doing, Pete?

  • - Dinger, get out!

  • [groans]

  • Oh, man.

  • - Pete, don't you dare.

  • - I got this. Don't worry.

  • Alabama, Alaska, Arizona,

  • Arkansas, California, Colorado, Connecticut...

  • Connecticut!

  • Connecticut!

  • - Delaware!

  • [indistinct conversation] - Oh.

  • I think that means she did it. - Good-bye, Mads.

  • - Good luck organizing that big closet in the sky.

  • - [chuckles] - This one's to you.

  • - Guys! Guys! I did it!

  • - All right! - There you go!

  • - You know, I think this makes you a permanent member

  • of the Part-Timers Club.

  • - A member? He should be president.

  • Sex with you literally made a woman see God.

  • - Guys, it was awesome.

  • Although no one ever told me that part of sex

  • was having your body turn ice cold from the inside out.

  • I think my junk has frostbite.

  • - Uh, yeah, I think that only happens during human-ghost sex.

  • - I really am gonna miss her, though.

  • You guys think she'll visit?