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  • Alice: Hello and welcome to 6 Minute English. I'm Alice.

  • Neil: and I'm Neil. Hello.

  • Alice: Hello, Neil. Now tell me, do you usually go dutch when you take someone out to dinner?

  • Neil: Now go dutch means to share the cost of something, for example a meal in a restaurant.

  • Well Alice, no, I usually expect my date to pay actually.

  • Alice: I hope you're joking, Neil. But I wouldn't be surprised!

  • Personally, I think it's a nice gesture to offer to pay for the meal when you're on a date.

  • Neil: Yeah. But it can depend on the situation.

  • Some people might be offended if you offered to pay for everything.

  • Alice: Well yes, true. Clearly you're not going to offend those people, Neil, though are you?

  • And I won't be going to dinner with you any time soon.

  • Neil: Well, I didn't ask so calm down, Alice!

  • Actually, money matters can cause relationship problems in couples

  • and that's the subject of the show. Here's today's quiz question based on a UK survey. Ready, Alice?

  • Alice: I am indeed.

  • Neil: What percentage of married couples don't know exactly what their spouse earns?

  • Is it: a) 4%? b) 14%? Or c) 44%

  • Alice: Well, gosh! I think b) 14%. Yes, that sounds about right to me.

  • Neil: Well, we'll find out if you're right or wrong later on.

  • Now, it seems important that couples are honest about their finances

  • because it can have an impact on their future financial options together.

  • Alice: Yes, that's right.

  • If you're buying a house together and then find out later that your spouseyour husband or wife

  • is thousands of pounds in debt, then the chances are you won't be able to get a mortgage.

  • To be in debt, by the way, means to owe money to someone.

  • Neil: Good point. A mortgage is where a bank lends you money to buy a house.

  • Let's listen now to what Arabella Russell, a relationship therapist, has to say about this.

  • Arabella Russell: The fact of the matter is it's very difficultit can be very difficult to talk about money.

  • Often when we talk about money,

  • it's emotions very close to usthere's guilt, there's shame.

  • What have we done in the past? To start those conversations is complicated.

  • Money can be about how we value ourselves, how we feel valued.

  • It's not just a simple case of talking about hard cash.

  • Neil: Arabella talks about 'hard cash'. Now what does that mean?

  • Alice: Well, we say hard cash when we talk about physical moneythe coins and banknotes

  • as opposed to other types of payment.

  • Neil: And why do we find it so difficult to talk about cash, Alice?

  • Alice: Well, because we get emotional about it!

  • Arabella talks about feelings of guilt and shame.

  • And for many of us, money isn't simply moneyit can be about how we value ourselves or feel valued.

  • Neil: Right ... so if I were to buy you a cheap engagement ring you would feel undervalued.

  • Alice: Nice example, Neil! You can't be a cheapskate when it comes to engagement rings!

  • So how much would you spend on our engagement ring, Neil?

  • Neil: Well... um... I didn't know we were getting married!

  • But if I was buying an engagement ring for you Alice,

  • I think definitely I would spend about... you know around... in the region of ... mmm pounds...

  • Alice: Sorry, Neil, I didn't quite catch that. Alright!

  • Neil: Are you calling me a cheapskate?

  • Alice: I certainly am, Neil. Cheapskate means someone who doesn't like spending money, by the way.

  • Moving on ... let's hear more from Arabella about how people have different attitudes towards money.

  • Arabella Russell: Except the fact that in your relationship you might do money differently

  • there might be a spender there might be a saver.

  • It's very tempting if your partner does things differently to say they're wrong.

  • They might do it differently because they see money differently.

  • Do it differently but have a budget. Of course be honest about each other

  • but recognise that you might just have a different view of money.

  • Neil: Now that sounds like excellent advice to me!

  • I'm a saver, and I'm not ashamed to say it.

  • Why waste money on an expensive engagement ring? Engagements don't always last.

  • You might drop the ring down the kitchen sink or...

  • Alice: How romantic, Neil!

  • Neil: It could be stolen or you know, you might meet someone else.

  • Alice: Indeed. Now I know I shouldn't say you're wrong... but you're wrong!

  • You have to invest in a relationship if you want it to work.

  • Neil: Calm down. I see money differently to you.

  • I'm a saver and you're a spender, and that's all there is to it.

  • Now a budget means the money you have available for something and a plan for how to use it.

  • Alice: Well, we'll have to agree to differ.

  • And that means accept that we have different opinions on this one!

  • Can we have the answer to today's quiz question then, please?

  • Neil: Yes, we can.

  • I asked: What percentage of married couples don't know exactly what their spouse earns?

  • Is it: a) 4%? b) 14%? or c) 44%

  • Alice: And I said b) 14%.

  • Neil: And you are absolutely and completely... wrong! The correct answer is 44%.

  • Now that's according to new research conducted by the UK credit report service, Noddle, who also found that

  • an astonishing 1.9 million married couples actively try to keep their finances secret from their partners!

  • Alice: Gosh, what a lot of people! Can we have today's words again then, Neil, please?

  • Neil: Yes, we can. Here they are:

  • go dutch

  • spouse

  • to be in debt

  • mortgage

  • hard cash

  • cheapskate

  • budget

  • agree to differ

  • Alice: Well, that brings us to the end of today's 6 Minute English.

  • We hope you thought today's programme was good value.

  • Please join us again soon. See you then.

  • Both: Bye.

Alice: Hello and welcome to 6 Minute English. I'm Alice.

Subtitles and vocabulary

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A2 UK TOEIC alice spouse engagement differently cash

BBC 6 Minute English November 26, 2015 - How much is your spouse worth?

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    Adam Huang posted on 2016/03/01
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