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  • something that you two would work out and get past,

  • but after tonight I think it's pretty clear

  • that you two genuinely do not want to get back together.

  • There's not a shot in hell. Gary.

  • I'm just... I got you.

  • As your friend and as your realtor,

  • I'm not gonna leave here tonight

  • until we decide what to do about this condo,

  • because this living situation is obviously not working out.

  • Gary?

  • Well, the only logical thing that I can think of

  • is for her to move out of the condo,

  • and then to pay me some sort of a penalty as compensation for

  • the labor that I did all around the condo. What? What?

  • What? Pay you compensation for your labor?

  • We fixed this place up together. Are you nuts?

  • Stop calling me nuts, I swear to God. I fixed the...

  • You went around with a sponge,

  • and you went in the bathroom and you dotted foofy shit.

  • That's what you're saying that I did? There's no...

  • That was... That's called aesthetics.

  • It warmed this place up so it didn't look like

  • an army barracks, which it was about to.

  • I'll tell you what it's called in his language, depreciated.

  • That's what it's called. You don't even know what that means.

  • Unless the next buyer happens to have your same Zulu-voodoo-land taste.

  • All right. Let me tell you something else.

  • It's gonna cost money to cover up the holes in the wall.

  • The holes that you drilled in the wall there to hang up whatever that thing is called.

  • Oh, please. Gary.

  • You're gonna have to cost money to fix that.

  • What I did, Brooke, has concrete value to the condo.

  • I added concrete... Well, let's just go on record.

  • We're dealing with facts here. I did the tiling in the bathroom.

  • Have you seen... I did the new track lighting.

  • That tile is the shittiest tile job. I did the plumbing!

  • The plumbing! That's realty terms.

  • Okay. Let's talk about your plumbing. This is his plumbing.

  • We have two temperatures in our bathroom.

  • We get either scalding hot or we get frostbite.

  • That's it. That's all we get. It's my problem

  • that she doesn't know how to pace a shower?

  • Now all of a sudden that's my fault.

  • I get a minute to take a shower.

  • One minute? One minute of warmth?

  • Oh, Jesus. One minute. That's it. That's correct.

  • Thank God you're not in charge of keeping all the clocks in Chicago on time.

  • This is basic logic. You are out of your mind. You have lost it.

  • Let me explain this to you in plain chapter and verse.

  • Cheese and rice, you guys are gonna kill each other. Now, let's just...

  • Realistically speaking, neither one of you

  • can afford this mortgage on your own, okay?

  • And that's a shame, because this building will continue to increase in value.

  • I get nothing but phone calls about it, all right?

  • Waiting for a unit to open up.

  • So, as your realtor, the last thing I would suggest is selling.

  • But as your friend, I just, I don't see any other solution.

  • You take your halves, you go your separate ways,

  • and you get on with your lives.

  • I know that selling is not the easiest thing, but I do think that it's the best.

  • And to be honest, this is a situation

  • where I would just as soon not take a commission.

  • That's great. Thank you. That's great. Thank you for that.

  • I wish I didn't have to, you know,

  • but company policy says I cannot waive that.

  • But I was just... You know, I'm saying in theory, you know.

  • In this situation, 'cause we're friends, I wish I could waive it.

  • No can do, though.

  • As soon as you can, I would love to get a set of keys from you guys.

something that you two would work out and get past,

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The Break-Up (8/10) Movie CLIP - Mediation (2006) HD

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