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  • (upbeat dance music)

  • - Come on Fox, go over there! - He's cute.

  • You wanna make out with someone?

  • Uhhh...

  • I would literally die if I made out with someone like once only.

  • Yeah, how do you live? I don't get it, I don't get it, I don't get it.

  • I'm good.

  • Aaaahh.

  • - This is so typical of you. - You're so cute.

  • Alright, just go over there...

  • - Why would you wear your favorite flannel today if you're not gonna go hit on some bitches? - Oh, you're so cute.

  • So that's me. The single friend.

  • I don't mind being single, but for some reason, everyone else seems to.

  • Why does it matter if I'm dating anyone?

  • Because you're awesome and you're cool and you deserve to be with someone who loves you.

  • Plus you have amazing boobs that need to be seen.

  • Also, if you never date anyone ever,

  • how are you gonna take a couple's basket weekend?

  • Being a single friend means a few different things.

  • First, everyone is always tryin' to set you up.

  • Richard!

  • Reminds me of the Dunkaroos kangaroo.

  • Uh... What about Melody?

  • She keeps calling me bro.

  • No, Jake.

  • You guys! I don't wanna be dating anyone!

  • I like being alone.

  • Amber?

  • Oh! Amber is so fuckin' hot!

  • It also means you spend a lot of time being the third wheel.

  • Or the fifth wheel.

  • Or the seventh wheel.

  • Basically, you're all the odd numbers.

  • Three, five, seven, nine, you get the point.

  • But it's not all bad.

  • Being the single friend also means you never have any relationship drama.

  • Oh, dating fuckin' sucks!

  • It turns out Heather, still in love with her ex-ex-girlfriend.

  • The gymnast?

  • No, the contortionist.

  • - Oh yeah. - Yeah.

  • Kim went MIA (missing in action) and hasn't text me back.

  • - Eww! - What!

  • Whatever, it's fine.

  • I need a grown-ass man anyway.

  • Yeah, no scrubs.

  • No scrubs.

  • But honestly, being single is pretty nice, 99% of the time.

  • You get to do what you wanna do whenever you wanna do it

  • with your favorite person in the world, you.

  • The only time it sucks is when you actually do have a crush on someone and you literally have no idea how to behave.

  • Oh god, is she coming over here?

  • Hey Fox, I didn't know you came here.

  • Uh, yeah, it's great.

  • Uh, the Yelp review is kinda deceiving.

  • You'd think being poorly rated when it has 3.5 stars which is relatively decent.

  • The entire star rating system is just crazy to me.

  • Oh, god, stop talking about Yelp stars, you weirdo.

  • Yeah, uh, I guess I never thought about it like that.

  • We should hang out sometime.

  • You could tell me about your Yelp theories and stuff.

  • Say something, literally anything.

  • She would love to.

  • She's free this Friday.

  • Okay. Sweet. Bye Fox.

  • See. Being a single friend isn't that bad.

  • Especially when you have crazy-ass friends to help you through it.

  • Hold up. Hold up.

  • - You see him over there? - Mmm...

  • I bet you I can get him to buy me a drink quicker than you can.

  • Can I use tongue?

  • I'll be.

  • Then it's motherfuckin' on!

  • Fox.

  • (laughter)

  • (upbeat dance music)

(upbeat dance music)

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B1 US fox single wheel fuckin dating dance music

What It’s Like Being The Perpetually Single Friend

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    Christina Lin posted on 2021/12/06
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