Were you ever good at sports?

we don't know

but the daily 4 a.m burrito haven't help

you ok?

she looks better in track shorts than literally anything else.

come on baby

you can do it

Ten more yards to touchdown!

However no matter what the activity

You'll always end up in the same way

wheezing

dowie

And begging her to slow down

you hate places like this

never mind

you love places like this

I love places like this

your friend is promoter

or DJ

whichever is cooler

you're funny

Is there non-alphabetical difference

between E & X ?

Cut to six weeks later

You're out of money, too tired

And have no idea what your pants are made of

wake up

I know the bouncer at the Prolaps.

You wouldn't give up this nap

for all the coked-up sex in the world.

Happy dinosaur ridding

Face it, you're a nice guy

Did you call all these beers?

But to her, you're James Dean with Wolverine claws.

It fun to play a crazy guy

but no crazy like real repressed crazy

Not tonight ?

No

Fine!

The worse parts ?

She still going to wake you up for 8 a.m. mass

This is it

The perfect tan

What years of television,print advertising and internet porn have taught you.

Baby

You're not using the couple's wallpaper I gave you?

Why you?

because she saw a Wes Anderson's trailer once

and thinks you're a corky

Who cars

Look at her

How long will it last ?

Once your talents for crippling insecurities and Kesha

You watching Teen Mom without me!

You just like my dad 你就像我爸

You'll keep a picture of her to show to friends

She'll not

She is not girl

You driving like my flappy virginia

And all you're doing is wondering what she is doing there with you

You're the one with Liberal Art degree