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  • Napoleon wasn’t short.

  • He was 5’7” which at the time was taller than average.

  • The rumor that he was a teeny tiny man was just a piece of British war propaganda.

  • Napoleon’s true Waterloo was mean people.

  • It’s not true that humans only use 10 percent of our brains.

  • No study has ever shown or even claimed that.

  • It’s just something people say for no reason.

  • Yeah, turns out the whole brain is important.

  • No matter what your drunk cousin Dave tells you, there’s no such thing as cow tipping, because cows sleep lying down.

  • Well then, what have I been getting drunk and knocking down them?

  • Mom?! Oh god, mommy I’m sorry!

  • Touching baby birds doesn’t make their mothers reject them.

  • Mamas love their babies.

  • That’s right!

  • You couldve saved that bird you saw when you were ten.

  • You let it die.

  • George Washington didn’t have wooden teeth.

  • His actual dentures were made of gold, lead, hippopotamus’s bones and donkey teeth.

  • Ha! Wood, how pedestrian.

  • There is no medical reason to drink eight glasses of water a day.

  • Now you tell me?

  • Sorry stoners, undercover cops don’t have to tell you theyre cops just because you asked them.

  • Cops are allowed to lie.

  • That’s not a thing.

  • Whoa wait! So are you a cop?

  • I’m not.

  • But like, you could be a cop?

  • No, I’m not.

  • Vikings didn’t wear horns on their helmets and the iron-maiden never existed.

  • It was a hoax that was made up in the 19th century.

  • Fake! Fake!

  • George Washington Carver didn’t invent peanut butter, Thomas Crapper didn’t invent the toilet and Al Gore never claimed he invented the internet.

  • That’s correct! What I did do was sponsored legislation

  • Oh my god youre so boring!

  • Albert Einstein didn’t fail high school math.

  • Of course I freaking didn’t.

  • I’m the greatest scientist of all time and you jackasses think I failed math?

  • E equals MC screw you!

  • Nice one!

  • The great wall of China is not visible from space.

  • Yeah, every astronaut looks and none of us had ever seen it.

  • But hey, why listen to us?

  • Were only astronauts.

  • Not to mention if youre ever thrown out of an airlock, you wouldn’t explode.

  • In fact, you can survive up to 30 seconds before you ran out of oxygen and lost consciousness.

  • So here’s a question: If none of these things are true, then why do we all believe them?

  • Simple!

  • Because they all tell good stories.

  • It’s so comforting and fun to think that Albert Einstein sucked at math too or that cops have to do what you say if you know the magic words, but that doesn’t make it true.

  • And nothing is more important than the truth.

  • Hey guys, I’m Adam Conover from College Humor.

  • Click here to subscribe or here to watch another video.

  • Might as well right?

  • I mean were all gonna die someday, might as well fucking live it up while we can.

Napoleon wasn’t short.

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