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Let's talk about the holidays.
How many of you have started your shopping?
Anybody? Yeah?
It's stressful, isn't it?
It's very stressful.
I thought of a brilliant way to get my shopping done.
I went to Target
because they have everything that I needed, and...
here's how I'm doing my shopping from now on.
[singing] She came to give it to you
[singing] It ain't what you do
Attention! Attention!
Target shoppers, this is talk show host
and all-around entertainer Ellen Degeneres.
I have a few announcements to make,
so please listen carefully.
First, if your license plate is 7LW493,
I have your side mirror.
I am so sorry.
[laughter] I apologize.
Also, I need some shopping.
I don't want to do it myself.
Whoever brings me the following items first
is gonna get a wonderful prize, all right?
Go to the toy section and find
the giant Elsa "Frozen" my size doll
[singing] You're here where you should be!
[singing] Snow is falling.
Bring me that and you get a prize.
[singing] It just wasn't the same.
[singing] Alone on Christmas day
[singing] Let it go.
Let it go.
You got it.
You win.
$500. You did it!
-Yes. -Thank you!
The next thing I need is a Chris March Santa beard.
The first three people. I need three of them.
You must be wearing it
when you arrive.
[singing] Alone to celebrate.
Why does Santa have three gardens, everybody?
'Cause he likes to "Hoe, Hoe, Hoe."
This thing on?
You have won.
Here's what I need now:
Taylor Swift's fragrance,Taylor by Taylor.
It's a gift for my tailor.
My tailor wants Taylor by Taylor.
If you have a tailor named Taylor,
your tailor would be getting a...
Look at you, already with that.
- $100 Gift card. - Awesome, thank you.
Thank you so much and take my holiday CD.
This is the biggest prize yet.
It's for $1,000 Target gift card.
Go get a bottle of booze of some kind.
Go get a beard. Put the beard on.
Go to the home section and get the threshold bar cart
and roll it here.
[singing] Alone on Christmas day
[singing] Presents, what a beautiful sight
[singing] Don't mean a thing if you ain't holding me tight.
Wonderful.
Whoo!
That is $1,000.
Kev, here's the Cuervo you asked for.
- Oh, thanks. - All right.
Okay, I need someone here at checkout five
because I need to get out of here.
And a happy holiday to you all.
That was fun.
More of that.
More of that. I like it.
All right.
I want to make your shopping easier,
so you're all gonna go home with a $150 Target gift card.
Yay!