Name: Signs of Manipulation To Watch Out For
Uploaded: 2025-08-25T17:54:32.000Z
Duration: 7 min 15 s
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Gaslighting, love bombing, and victimization are just a few examples of manipulative tactics used to take power from someone.

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But there are even more subtle manipulation tactics that can be difficult to detect, as they often involve subtle cues and psychological manipulation, rather than overt threats or coercion.

Today, we'll look into how others can subtly manipulate your perception through your blind spots and vulnerabilities, aiming to help you protect yourself against such manipulation.

Skutimization is like having a mental blind spot.

It happens when people unconsciously ignore or overlook certain information, and it can be used as a manipulative tactic where someone intentionally exploits or takes advantage of another person's tendency to ignore or overlook certain information.

Manipulators may use this psychological phenomenon to control or influence someone's perception by strategically presenting or withholding information.

For example, a manipulator might provide selective information that supports their agenda while deliberately omitting details that could lead to a different interpretation.

By exploiting the individual's blind spots, or skutimization, the manipulator aims to shape their target's perception in a way that serves the manipulator's goals.

The balance theory manipulation tactic involves influencing someone's preferences by leveraging positive relationships.

Essentially, people are more likely to adopt the likes and dislikes of those they have a good relationship with.

Manipulators take advantage of this by intentionally fostering positive connections and then subtly steering others towards their preferences.

Suppose a person befriends someone who is known for their generosity and kindness.

Over time, the manipulator pretends to share similar values and interests to deepen the friendship.

But behind the scenes, they're just using the kind friend to borrow money without any plans to pay it back.

On top of that, they're also using the friendship to get access to different friend groups and other social perks, taking advantage of the friendship for their own gain.

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Smear campaigns are when the manipulator launches harsh attacks on someone's reputation.

Manipulators often use this tactic when they can't control you anymore.

They try to manipulate how others see you, hoping to cut you off from the rest of the group.

When people are power hungry, they go for smear campaigns or what we call burning steak shows.

We don't literally burn people on steaks these days, but these smear campaign moves can still mess up someone's life by damaging their reputation.

For example, spreading false information and rumors about someone at work or in their personal life can be part of it.

So if you know someone who loves gossiping about people they don't like or can't control, be cautious and don't believe everything they say.

You might become their target too, especially if you see through their controlling behavior and lies.

Manipulative self-disclosure is when someone spills fake or unnecessary personal details to earn social brownie points, planning to later cash them in to get more important information from their target.

See, personal information is really valuable in social dealings.

It can make the person sharing it feel empowered, but it also makes them a bit vulnerable.

Plus, it builds trust and strengthens connections.

Now, in the world of social exchange, giving out valuable information sets you up to get some in return, or at the very least, it kind of pressures the other person to spill the beans because of the whole I scratch your back, you scratch mine idea.

They might throw out useless or unasked for personal information, making the target feel pressured to spill their own valuable details.

Or if the manipulator has a clear goal in mind, they might drop some personal information nobody asked for, and then straight up ask for the juicy stuff they really want in return.

It's like a tricky game of give and take that's not fair play.

Manipulative moralizing is when someone makes you feel guilty for not living up to their idea of what's right or moral.

Now, who gets to decide what's a good set of morals?

If it's the manipulator, there might be a hidden agenda.

They use guilt to push you to change your behavior, making it fit their idea of proper conduct, often seeking to influence behavior or gain a sense of power and satisfaction.

When they're good at it, you end up feeling judged and not good enough.

So to avoid this, you might adjust your beliefs and actions to match what the manipulator thinks is right, or you might even hide your true self.

Moralizing often comes across as judgment from a self-appointed authority, sometimes known as moral policing.

For example, imagine a friend who constantly criticizes your lifestyle choices, making you feel like you're doing everything wrong.

Over time, you might start changing your behavior just to avoid their judgment, even if it means hiding aspects of who you truly are.

The friend, in this case, is using manipulative moralizing to control your actions and beliefs according to their standards.

Pity plays are like when someone tries to make you feel sorry for them, either by acting helpless or by playing the victim.

They want you to do something for them out of pity.

Imagine a friend who always complains about their tough luck and portrays themselves as a perpetual victim, making everyone else the problem and hoping you'll feel sorry for them and help them out of pity.

It's even more powerful when combined with guilt-tripping, when they make you feel guilty and say, I'm a victim because of you, so you need to make it up to me.

Pity plays are like a last resort manipulation tactic.

When someone has no other way to get what they want, they might pull a pity play.

When this happens, it's important to be cautious, since pity plays can also be used to unfairly make someone look bad.

To wrap it up, knowing about manipulation tactics helps us stay alert in relationships.

By setting healthy boundaries and keeping communication open, we create spaces for real connections where manipulation has a hard time finding a foothold.

Have you encountered any of these tactics?

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