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  • From the director who just wants to watch the world go boom

  • and the studio that enables him

  • comes the dumbest, most incoherent Transformers movie yet...

  • which is really saying something.

  • Did he just...punch a guy with a car?

  • Transformers: Age Of Extinction.

  • Prepare for a total reinvention of the franchise, with an all new cast,

  • all new villains,

  • and cool new allies

  • only to end up with the same overlong piece of sh*t where once again we have no

  • idea

  • what's

  • happening.

  • "Oh my god!"

  • Hey, if Michael Bay can reuse shots, we can reuse Transformers jokes.

  • Shia Laboeuf is gone, and neither you nor Bumblebee nor Optimus Prime will care where

  • he went.

  • Instead, settle in with Boston-native Texan Kade Yeager.

  • A man fighting against all odds to sound intelligent.

  • "That is a super simplex theater projector. It's very rare."

  • "who taught you how to solder a circuit? Me, that's what I do!"

  • Oh, and he's also an inventor.

  • "I know you have a conscience because you're an inventor like me."

  • "I'm so gonna patent this sh*t!"

  • "Some things should never be invented."

  • "That's what great inventors do."

  • "I'm an inventor! This could be a game-changer for me! If I could apply that technology to

  • my inventions, we'd never have to worry about money again!"

  • You're an inventor. We get it.

  • In a franchise that's known for objectifying hot young women,

  • prepare for a new low

  • as they make the movie's hot chick an underage girl,

  • "Sweetheart, your shorts are shrinking by the second."

  • make her boyfriend a legal adult, and literally stop the movie to explain why it's okay for

  • them to pork.

  • "You're a 17 year old girl. How old are you?"

  • "20."

  • "She's a minor."

  • "We're protected by the Romeo and Juliet laws."

  • "We dated for a little while I was a sophomore and he was a senior. It's fine."

  • "No, it's not fine."

  • "We've got a preexisting juvenile foundational relationship. Statute two-seven-zero-five

  • dash three."

  • If only they'd put as much time into justifying the plot as they

  • did for having sex with a minor.

  • The Transformers are back, and they're as over these movies as we are.

  • "This is isn't our fight! Let's go!"

  • "See ya. Goodbye."

  • Especially Optimus Prime.

  • "We're done defending the humans."

  • "Autobots, we're done."

  • Watch as they bumble their way through another Michael Bay crapfest so lazily produced he

  • didn't bother to fix these green screen monitors,

  • has scenes go from day to night to day again,

  • and left the Sears Tower up in the background

  • of HONG KONG.

  • So get ready for another sequel that you hoped would be better, but instead shoved the exact

  • same thing down our gullible throats,

  • featuring even more

  • Unrealistic explosions

  • going off around unfunny comic relief

  • during a neverending sunset

  • near an American flag.

  • Hey guys? Why is the rest of this trailer written in Chinese?

  • Hey!

From the director who just wants to watch the world go boom

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B2 inventor optimus reuse franchise extinction bay

Honest Trailers - Transformers: Age of Extinction (變形金剛4 灭绝重生)

  • 454 25
    james9763 posted on 2014/11/23
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