I'm your host, Leo, the guy who can teach you something while making you laugh.

And I'm Gwen, your informative host, here to help you get useful information.

And yeah, don't forget to focus on our sharings.

Not just your jokes, Leo.

Got it, got it.

Just ask our listeners.

I always share useful tips, right?

Okay, I trust you.

Yeah, I won't make you feel disappointed.

No need to be that serious.

Making others feel disappointed is not a big deal.

Oh, you're absolutely right.

It's also the topic we will share today.

Dear our listeners, you can pause the video, close your eyes, and answer the following questions.

Do you think negative thinking is good or bad?

Do you feel bad when you are disappointed in yourself?

And do you want to overcome that feeling?

Can I answer these questions?

Oh, Leo, that's for our listeners.

Anyway, fine.

I believe our beloved listeners also want to hear your answers.

Before being happy like I am now, I always worried about saying something people wouldn't like.

And because of that, I also ended up disappointing myself.

And now, I've overcome that feeling.

So I'm really excited to share with my audience.

I understand you, Leo.

Dear listeners, if you've ever had a feeling like Leo, being sad because things didn't go as planned, or because you don't meet people's needs, this episode is for you.

Today, we're talking about something that many people feel but don't talk about much, being disappointed in yourself.

That's right.

Disappointment can feel overwhelming.

But the good news is, it's something we can work through together.

We've prepared a special free PDF for this episode, full of useful phrases for your learning.

Don't forget to check it out.

Let's start.

First, let's talk about why it's completely fine to feel disappointed.

Have you ever noticed how fast we tend to judge ourselves when we experience negative emotions?

We often think things like, I shouldn't feel this way, or there must be something wrong with me.

But the truth is, feeling disappointed is a normal part of being human.

Exactly.

In fact, research from the University of California shows that almost 70% of people regularly experience self-doubt.

It's a normal part of life.

Instead of trying to push these feelings away, the key is to accept them and remind ourselves that it's okay to feel the way we do.

Leo, can you take an example for listeners to understand?

Sure.

Let's say you applied for a job but didn't get it.

It's totally natural to feel disappointed.

Instead of thinking, I'm such a failure, try telling yourself, it's okay to feel sad about this, I put in the effort, and it's normal to feel upset.

Let's practice that phrase together.

Repeat after me.

It's okay to feel this way.

I'm allowed to feel disappointed.

Great.

Remember, feelings aren't good or bad, they just are.

What matters is how we respond to them.

Now that we've accepted how we feel, let's go a bit deeper.

Ask yourself, why am I feeling disappointed?

Understanding the real reason behind our feelings can make a big difference.

That's really important.

Disappointment often comes from things like setting goals that are too high, comparing ourselves to others, or being afraid of failing.

When we figure out what's really causing the disappointment, we can start to work on it.

For example, let's say you worked hard on a presentation, but it didn't go as well as you hoped.

Instead of saying, I'm terrible at this, ask yourself, what could I have done differently?

Did I practice enough or was I too nervous?

Writing things down can help too.

Dr. James Pennebaker, a psychologist at the University of Texas, suggests that journaling about your feelings can help you process them better.

Try this.

Take a notebook and write down, what am I feeling right now and why?

Let's try writing.

It is good for a lot of issues in our life.

So that's how you help yourself get over your disappointment?

It doesn't help at all.

Hey!

Just joking.

I mean, it doesn't help at all if you just write without thinking about yourself.

You're free to write anything, as long as it's related to you.

It could be about study or work problems or some mental problems that we might face.

I agree.

It takes time to reflect.

It means to think about things you have done.

But you know, it's really worth it.

The more we understand our emotions, the better control we have over them.

Can I ask you a question, Gwen?

Yeah, why not?

Have you ever set a goal for yourself and when you didn't achieve it exactly how you wanted, you felt like quitting?

Oh, I've been there many times.

When I don't get into the school I want or I keep looking but never get called in for an interview, that's when I feel the most frustrated.

Trying to be perfect can really trap us.

Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar, a professor at Harvard who teaches about happiness, says that trying to be perfect only causes stress and frustration.

Instead of aiming for perfection, he recommends aiming for good enough.

What matters more is making progress than being perfect.

But don't get me wrong, what I mean is not about just being enough, not wanting to develop more.

It's about trying with a suitable goal.

Think about how a baby learns to walk.

They stumble, fall, and get back up, right?

We don't expect them to walk perfectly right away, do we?

So why do we expect ourselves to be perfect all the time?

Remember, it's all about progress, not perfection.

Every step forward, even if it's small, is what helps us improve and grow.

Letting go of perfection gives us the freedom to keep going, no matter what.

Let's take a break and learn some new phrases today.

You can take your own example on each phrase to understand it more.

Push something away.

Definition.

Try to avoid or ignore something.

Example.

It's not healthy to push your feelings away when you feel sad.

Face the problem.

Definition.

To directly deal with a situation or issue.

Example.

Instead of avoiding the problem, face it and try to solve it.

Figure out.

Definition.

To understand or solve something.

Example.

We need to figure out why the project is not going well.

Aim for.

Definition.

Trying to achieve or reach something.

Example.

She's aiming for a promotion at work by improving her skills.

Make progress.

Definition.

To move forward or improve in something.

Example.

He made progress in his English speaking skills after a few lessons.

Now practice with some questions below to see how well you understand the topic.

Type your answer in the comment section to discuss with other listeners.

What's a better way to deal with disappointment?

Accept the feeling and remind yourself that it's okay to feel that way.

How can writing things down help you deal with your emotions?

Writing things down helps you process and understand your feelings.

Now we will learn more ways to have a positive thinking.

Let's shift gears and talk about something positive.

Celebrating small wins.

When was the last time you praised yourself for even a little achievement?

It could be something simple, but it still counts.

That's such an important point.

So often we overlook our small successes and only focus on big achievements.

The truth is, even small wins can actually boost our motivation and happiness.

It's a great way to remind yourself that you're moving forward, even if it doesn't always feel like it.

Every small win is proof that you're on the right track.

Absolutely.

For example, maybe you learned five new words in English today.

That's a win.

It doesn't matter how small it seems.

It's progress.

Or perhaps you completed a task at work that had been on your to-do list for days.

Maybe you helped a friend with something.

Or even just took time for yourself to relax and recharge.

These moments matter.

They're part of your journey, and they deserve recognition.

Imagine this.

You've just made a mistake, and the first thought that pops into your head is, Well, that's it.

I'll never recover from this.

Sound familiar?

It's easy to feel that way, but here's a secret.

Mistakes aren't the end.

They're just the beginning of a new lesson.

I read about Sarah Blakely, who started Spanx with no money and little business experience.

She made many mistakes, like struggling with manufacturers and marketing.

But instead of giving up, she learned from each mistake and became a self-made billionaire.

I can relate to that.

A while ago, I tried learning how to play the guitar.

My first few attempts were terrible.

I couldn't even play a simple song.

But instead of getting discouraged, I practiced every day, learned from my mistakes, and now I can play a few songs pretty well.

I'm still not perfect, but I'm much better than before.

Well, mistakes are like stepping stones that lead you to improvement.

Now, let's talk about something really important.

Being kind to yourself.

This is called self-compassion.

Think of it as treating yourself the way you would treat a close friend when they're feeling down.

Yeah, Dr. Kristen Neff, who researches self-compassion, explains that we need to be gentle with ourselves, especially in tough moments.

It's easy to be kind to others, but we often forget to treat ourselves with that same care.

Think about this.

If a friend came to you feeling down because of a mistake, you wouldn't say, you're awful at this.

You'd say something like, it's okay.

Everyone makes mistakes.

You're doing your best.

Let's try that together.

Next time you feel down, say to yourself, I'm doing my best and that's enough.

Ready?

Let's repeat it.

Well done.

Being kind to yourself doesn't just lift your mood.

It also gives you the strength to try again and keep going.

Last but not least, we'll talk about finding motivation.

After feeling disappointed, it can be hard to start again.

You can also talk to a friend or someone you trust.

Sharing your feelings can help you feel lighter and more hopeful.

Great.

Remember, every step forward, no matter how small, brings you closer to your goal.

We will learn the last five phrases for today.

Make sure to practice speaking all of them.

Stepping Stone Definition, a step towards progress.

Example, each project is a stepping stone in your career.

Lift someone's mood.

Definition, make someone feel happier.

Example, a compliment can lift your mood instantly.

Step forward.

Definition, reach towards a goal.

Example, completing the task was a step forward.

Pop into someone's head.

Definition, suddenly thinking of something.

Example, an idea popped into my head while reading.

Feel down.

Definition, feeling sad.

Example, a kind word can help when you're feeling down.

Let's wrap this episode by answering the questions below.

Just share your thoughts with us in the comment section.

What does celebrating small wins mean?

It means appreciating small achievements, like learning a new word or finishing a small task.

Recognizing these helps boost motivation and happiness.

Why is talking to a friend helpful?

It helps you feel better, think clearly, and can motivate you to move forward.

We talked about disappointment and how to deal with it.

We learned that it's normal to feel this way, but we don't have to stay stuck.

That's right.

By understanding your feelings, letting go of perfection, celebrating your small wins, and being kind to yourself, you can turn disappointment into growth.

Thank you for joining us today.

You're doing amazing, and we're proud of you for learning and trying your best.

See you next time.

Goodbye.