So I was with Joshua for an hour today and he has not asked me out. Just so frustrating.

Why don't you ask him out?

Oh yeah, totally. That's such a turn on.

Really? It doesn't seem desperate?

That's the turn on.

He just got a divorce, right?

So he's probably really nervous around women, you know?

Maybe you just need to make the first move.

Yeah, but I've never asked a guy out before.

You've never asked a guy out?

No, have you?

Thousands of times.

That doesn't make me sound too good, does it?

I don't even know how I would go about it.

Oh, what I do is I look a woman up and down and I say, "Hey, how you doing?"

Oh, please.

Hey. How you doing?

And done.

Oh my god.

I didn't feel a thing.

Are you still looking for a job, 'cause you could tweeze circles around that sadistic at the salon.

Thanks.

You wanna see what it looks like?

Yeah, yeah.

Hey, they totally match!

They look great, they look great.

How you doing?

Yeah, yeah, I think it looks pretty good.

I was a little bit worried that I was uncovering a birthmark right about there, but it turned out to be a little piece of chocolate.

Hey Chandler, thank you so much.

No problem.

Listen, curl my eyelashes.

Yeah!

Great, thanks. Bye, bye.

Hey Joey, how come our stuff isn't free?

It will be when you look like that in a tight skirt.

This is great. I'm getting more dates than ever.

Wait a minute, Joey, you're only giving away free stuff to the pretty girls?

Joey, that is so gross!

How about a scone on the house, baby?

I'm pretty.

Oh, I got something.

Okay, it's this story that I came up with, very romantic.

I swear, any woman that hears it, they're like putty.

Really?

Well, then, tell it to me.

Okay, years ago when I was backpacking across Western Europe-

You were backpacking across Western Europe?

Have a nice six more months, Ross.

Okay, okay, I'm sorry.

Please, please, you were in Western Europe and?

I was just outside of Barcelona, hiking in the foothills of Mount Tibi Dabu.

I was at the end of this path and I came to a clearing and there was a lake, very secluded, and there were tall trees all around.

It was dead silent, gorgeous.

And across the lake I saw a beautiful woman bathing herself, but she was crying.

Why?

Wow, so I get to see what Joey Tribbiani is like on a date.

So do you have any moves?

No, no, I'm just myself and if they don't like me-

I'm sorry, I couldn't even get through that.

I knew it, I knew it.

Come on, tell tell me your moves.

All right.

Well, okay, I usually start by having a bottle of wine sent to my table from a fan.

Oh my God.

And that works?

Well, it does when you combine it with, this is so embarrassing.

I just want to have a normal life.

Oh, you poor little famous man.

Okay, how about this one?

I was going to wait until the end of the night to kiss you, but you're just so beautiful, I don't think I can.

Oh my god!

That was fantastic!

I almost leaned in, I really almost did.

All right, so tell me one of your moves.

All right.

So where'd you grow up?

That's you move?

Wow Rach, you're lucky you're hot.

Just answer the question.

Queens.

And so, were you close to your parents?

Yeah, with my mom, yeah. Not so much with my dad.

Why not?

I dunno. I guess there's just always been this distance, you know?

I mean, we both try to pretend it's not there, but it is.

That's gotta be rough.

It is, yeah.

It's really tough.

You know, sometimes I think-

Wow!

Nice move!

Where'd you grow up?

So simple.

Thank you.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go to the restroom.

And now you're watching me walk away.

Yes, I am. Again, so simple.

Come on.

You like this woman, right?

Well, yeah.

You want to see her again, right?

Sure.

Well, if you can't talk dirty to me, how are you going to talk dirty to her?

Now tell me you want to caress my butt!

Okay, turn around.

I just don't want you staring at me when I'm doing this.

All right, all right, all right.

I'm not looking, go ahead.

Okay.

I want- okay.

I want to feel your hot, soft skin with my lips.

There you go. Keep going, keep going.

I want to take my tongue and, and-

Say it.

Say it!

Run it all over your body until you're trembling with-

With?