Um, Patrick,

I think that really is a flying houseboat.

What is it, Patrick?

It's probably just one of those fake haunted houses,

you know, for babies.

I don't know, Patrick,

it's very scary-looking... and spooky.

It looks like fun, I'm going to check it out.

Patrick, wait for me!

[laughing]

[grunting]

Hey, SpongeBob, can you give me a boost?

Um.

[grunting]

A little to the left.

[grunting]

A little help?

[grunting]

Hurry up, lazy-bones!

[grunting]

Wow. Look at this place! It's so cheesy!

Check out this lame doorknob.

[shrieking]

[chuckles nervously]

Let's check out inside.

I don't know, Patrick.

Oh, come on, don't be such a baby.

Wow, so lame.

[thundering]

Nice attention to detail, though.

Huh. So not scary.

Hey, this is a nice picture.

[Screaming]

Did you say something, SpongeBob?

[screaming]

Hey, SpongeBob, check this out!

Okay, I'll be right there.

Even the spiders are fake!

I wish something would... pop out of a closet!

Like a big, hairy hand!

That would be scary!

[screaming]

But this place is too low budget for that!

[screaming, shivering]

Would be cool, though, wouldn't it?

Yeah, that'd be [gulps] neato.

[organ playing]

Patrick, where is that music coming from?

I think it's coming from that guy.

[organ playing, thundering]

Who dares trespass upon me haunted houseboat?

[thundering]

We do!

Aye. And what manner of beastie might you two be?

Look at the attention to detail in his mouth.

It's all... rotten and slimy.

His bad breath is incredible!

His hair is very authentic, too. It's dirty.

[sniffing] Eww. It reeks,

and check out the workmanship on the jaw mechanism.

Remarkable-build quality!

Obviously a puppet or a robot!

Oh, we must be in one of those fancy pizza parlors,

with those singing animated robots!

Robots? Puppets? Pizza parlors?! Arr!!

Sing us a song, robot!

What? Sing for ye?

Oh, whoops! [chuckles]

You're right. I almost forgot.

You're coin-operated, aren't you?

[coughing]

So you want me to sing ye a shanty, eh?

Uh-huh! Uh-huh!

Don't put yourself out for us!

And you do not think I'm a real ghost, do ye?

- Nope! - I do, Mr. dead pirate, sir!

Oh, oh, oh, I'll sing ye a song, all right!

A song so terrifying,

you'll have to believe I'm a ghost!

[laughing]

This show is going to be so awesome.

[laughs nervously] Yeah, awesome.

Hit it, fingers!

♪ Yo-ho-ho, yo-hoooooooooooo! ♪

[whispering] They're good!

♪ Oh, we're the ghouls Of the briny deep ♪

♪ Under the waves We like to creep ♪

♪ Creeping in coffins With spider webs ♪

♪ As ghostly pillows Beneath our heads ♪

♪ Oh, we're the ghouls Of the briny deep ♪

♪ Under the waves We like to creep ♪

♪ We wear black shrouds That look quite neat ♪

♪ but we don't own shoes 'Cause we have no feet ♪

♪ Ha-ha-ha ♪

♪ We like to haunt And frighten and scare ♪

♪ 'Til you jump right out Of your underwear ♪

♪ We like to eat eyes And brains ♪

♪ And drink our grog From rusty drains ♪

♪ We don't keep animals Like cutesy snails ♪

Gary!

♪ Our favorite pet's The cat-o-nine-tails! ♪

Meow.

[screaming]

Do you believe we're real ghosts now?

Where's my pizza?

What kind of pizza joint are you running anyhow?