[record scratch]

[gasps]

Bubble Bass.

- Ah! - SquarePants...

I hear talk you make a mean Krabby Patty.

Yep.

I hear talk you're kinda picky.

[hisses] Yep.

What is this? I feel wet!

Is it blood? Am I bleeding?

[record scratch]

The coolest jellyfish enthusiast ever.

Kevin the C. Cucumber.

I only use composite materials in my net handle.

[repeating] Composite materials.

Next question.

[repeating] Next question.

Uh...

Hi, Kevin.

Hi. What is your question?

- Hi, Kevin. - Whatever.

Next question, please.

Hi, Kevin.

Hello, loser. All right, you, way in the back.

Hi, Kevin.

Does anyone here have an actual--

[loud wheezing]

Hi, Kevin.

I'm your biggest fan.

You're too kind.

Security!

I'm stronger than a jelly!

Bros and broettes,

get on my back!

[record scratch]

Craig Mammalton?

The tannest man on TV?

[laughs] None other.

Oh, look at those gorgeous wrinkles.

What, these?

[cheering]

It's incredible, campers,

but the monster appears to be expanding!

Either this is nature at its most majestic,

or we're all gonna be blown to pieces!

[record scratch]

And now we go to Perch Perkins at the scene!

That's right! Perch Perkins here at Goo Lagoon,

bringing you the latest on this Super Goo event.

What do you think of Super Goo, young man?

I'm on TV!

And you, sir, what's your opinion?

Uh, sir?

It's awesome.

Uh, that's great.

[shuddering]

- [hissing] - [screaming]

Kidferatu!

[screams]

Oh, look at that.

It's past our dead time... I mean, bedtime!

[record scratch]

Wait, if that was you on the phone

and you on the bus,

then who was flickering the lights?

[in unison] Nosferatu!

Hello there.

This must be the nudist camp?

What makes you say that?

Well, you're nude.

Actually, I'm only partially nude.

I like to think of myself as a bridge

between the clothed and the unclothed.

[record scratch]

Could I borrow a couple of these?

Mm-hm.

[record scratch]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

A sea bunny?

Ah-hah!

- Hah! - Ow!

[tuning a banjo]

[grunting]

Hmm...

That voracious vermin is ruining my French chef fantasy.

Why... Ah!

[growling]

Oh! Oh, no, no, no! I have a ticklish core!

[laughing]

[repeating "meep"]

Bleah!

Of course I'll watch her for you!

And I'll make sure she has her bottle.

[record scratch]

Anchovies.

What?

Anchovies!

[repeating "meep" over and over]

Please, please, quiet!

Is this any way to behave, hmm?

Meep.

Can we show a little decency

and form a neat, single file line

in front of the register?

[repeating "meep" over and over]

[laughing]

[playing with no rhythm]

Oh, hey, boys. What can I do you for?

It's dinner time.

Want to get food with us?

Nah, y'all go on ahead. I ate a late lunch.

Besides, I could use a little peace and quiet

to finish my new invention.

[record scratch]

I don't need it.

I don't need it.

I don't need it.

I don't need it.

I... need... it!

[gasping]

No, SpongeBob!

No, no, no! Stop!

Pinky! Pinky!

I'm a quitter!

[screaming]

You can't leave now.

You'll blow it.

Air is not good, Patrick.

Air is not good.

You're just being shy.

Don't worry, buddy, you're doing fine.

[panting]

I won't let you blow... this.

[wheezing]

[coughing]

[gasping]

What kind of place is this?!

Come and get it!

You're all gonna like this...

[screams]

[dramatic sting]