Hello everyone. Today I'm going to talk to you all about a passion subject for me,

divine masculine and divine feminine. This subject provokes so much confusion.

Now we understand that we're in the age of Aquarius,

and most of us who are in the spiritual community think

that part of the age of Aquarius is femininity, or divine feminine

raising up into its power

so there is balance that is restored in this universe or within the human race.

There is an idea that in order for the human race to come into an aspect

of balance relative to masculine and feminine that masculinity has to come down

in its level of power and that femininity has to rise up in it's level of power,

and then you will have balance.

But I'm here to tell you today that this is not the truth at all.

We are not sitting on some kind of cosmic scale.

And I can tell you first hand

that rising into power for women

has nothing to do with decreasing in power for men.

Another way of saying this is that the balance that will be restored

within humanity and on this planet Earth relative to masculine and feminine

is about both rising into power. Now I know what you're thinking,

'wait a second, masculinity has been in control and in power for

thousands of years.' What if I told you that isn't true.

What if I told you that masculinity, divine masculine,

has not actually ever reached its point of power.

What if I told you that divine masculine has been acting from a place

of powerlessness for years upon years. Men have striped power from women

for thousands of years. There is a big difference between gaining

power yourself and striping power away from another.

When you strip power away from someone else

by brute force, by subjugation,

you do not increase your power one bit.

You stay where you are vibrationally while you diminish the power of another.

This is the only reason that it seems one has more power than the other.

But you are not powerful because someone else is weak.

Women have made a major mistake

and that mistake is to do the same thing to men that men have done to us

for centuries. To take our power back by de-masculinizing them.

and this of course is coming from an understandable place,

we have spent most of our lives feeling completely powerless to men.

The truth is we've felt powerless for so many years

that the natural step from that powerless space is into anger and revenge.

and so our culture in the west has striped masculinity out of men

and while many patriarchal misogynists still do exist,

many men, especially those who watch videos like this one

are afraid to come into their power because they are sorry for what men

have done to women in the past. They're afraid of becoming monsters,

they associate their masculine power as negative instead of positive.

As you know, I like putting myself on the line in these videos so I'm going

to open up to you now: most of you who have been following my story

and my videos know that my childhood was extreme. I was subjugated by men,

prostituted by men, I was used for their amusement since I was 6 years old

and yet I grew up a beautiful woman

and so I did not feel the same kind of powerless to them that many women feel

because I felt as if I could manipulate my way into anything relative to men,

I could get them to do what I wanted them to do.

But recently I came into touch with my own femininity

I basically started exploring what it was I was disconnected with relative to

my own womanhood and what I've found is

that there is a bunch of levels that I had not really examined

relative to me disconnecting to my own femininity,

me feeling as if men have basically striped my connection with

my feminine power away and regardless of whether it took the shape of a man

actually controlling me, which is didn't, it took another shape, I found.

Which was that I came into contact with the fact that I have so much shame

relative to being a woman. And I did identify that the origin of those beliefs

is coming from men in my childhood. So even though I may not have felt as if

I was being directly subjugated by them, I was being indirectly subjugated by men.

And I went into a real spiral about this because I realized that I had shame

relative to everything that my body was doing and I had this belief, that it was

better to be born a man, which is a belief which most women I've talked to share.

I got mad.

For the first time in my life, I really related to the women in the 60's movements

where I just felt as if I had lost my connection

with being a woman and there was something inherent in my nature that

was not okay and should not be embraced and should be ashamed of.

So, I experienced this interesting thing relative to my ex-husband where he was

meaning well, but I came downstairs after all this realization about the fact

that I had felt powerless to men for years and not been aware of it because it took

such a covert form within me. And I came downstairs and I expressed all of this

new epiphany with him about the fact that our society in general makes women feel

as if we are not appropriate in and of ourselves, as if we're not good enough

as women and as if there's some inherent shame that comes along with being a woman.

And that I felt as if I was very disconnected with myself as a female,

that I felt more masculine, in fact. And I started ranting and raving about

what I observed in this current society, which is that it is a societal issue

not only on this continent, not only in the western world, but in the world

in general, it's a collective human belief among women that there is something

inappropriate about divine feminine, something shameful about it.

Now, meaning well, and understanding my teachings, he said 'well yeah, you'd be

a match to that wouldn't you? That's your creation, you won't meet any women

in your reality that are in a space of power because your point of attraction

is that women aren't." Now I have to tell you, in that split second

I experienced what many women have experienced for years and I related

to women who have been fighting against men for years and I got

really angry in that minute. And I almost bit his head off (laughing)

because I felt as if I was coming from a space of powerlessness, I didn't realize

how powerless I felt to my own divine feminine nature and I was coming from

that space of powerlessness into a space of more power, which felt like anger

and in that moment, that invalidation of the powerlessness I felt for years,

I got so furious that downstream was revenge. So, I must say,

the reason I shared that is because it is understandable why so many people

watching this video would feel a lot of anger relative to men and a lot of anger

even relative to hearing me say that balance in the universe is not going

to be restored by femininity rising up and masculinity decreasing, but rather

by the rising up of both. I resisted my femininity for years because

I grew up in a society like most of us do, where I was convinced it was better

to be born a boy. I was brutalized and prostituted, I felt out of control

of my body, I grew up in a culture that believed that there were just

certain things that came along with being a girl that were our cross to bear.

I didn't want to be a girl, I hardened my personality so much that I lost touch

with my femininity. I perceived my femininity as weakness, I was repulsed

by the idea of being a woman and yet, every month I bled, and yet,

I bear children. When I was young,

I grew up in a culture which believed in the idea of Adam and Eve.

And in the story of Adam and Eve,

Eve is the one that picks the apple and after that is damned basically by God,

cursed by God and is seen as a sinner.

She is basically, Eve is the origin of sin and the reason women bleed each month

and the reason that childbirth is painful to this particular culture is

because of that original sin. So it's the cross to bear of every woman

to suffer for the original sin of Eve. And so, there is something in the culture

that I grew up in, that says it is sinful, or something that should be repented for,

in even being born a girl. So men seem stronger to me,

they could survive the kinds of things I was going through when I felt

that I couldn't. And regardless of what I wanted or didn't want,

I understood that my body would yield to theirs.

I mean, I had my first period at 15 years old and my very next cycle I got pregnant

by my abuser which is a man that was in his 60's at the time.

And I must admit,

I felt like my body betrayed me.

The odd thing that I found out when I started seeing clients is

it didn't take the extremity of the kind of situation I was in as a child

to develop these feelings relative to your own femininity. I want you to

let this sink in for a minute, I have not met one woman

in all of my years of doing this job that does not feel some kind of alienation

and separation from their own eternal femininity. And we could consider

femininity the essence of who they are in this life. That's kind of a problem.

We make an enemy of our gender and yet we can't escape it.

and the same goes for men. It's no different.

So many men on this planet reject their own masculinity,

they have no idea what it is. What is it to be a man?

What is it to be a woman? It's the question in all of our minds.

We're in this eternal struggle relative to our own gender, we can't figure out

what it means. And so there's sort of a power struggle that goes on

between men and women and we spend most of our time trying to strip the other

of it's power in order to feel as if we have power, but you know

what's interesting? We find we're not actually attracted to our polar aspect,

whether that be male, whether that be female, if that polar aspect is not in

a space of it's true power and it's true potential. So we may try

to strip away their power, but it's at the detriment of uniting because we're

no longer attracted to one another. Men try to take the power away from women

and find that they are actually not attracted to ignorant, weak,

subjugated lemmings. Women try to take their power back from men

and realize that they do not respect and are not attracted to de-masculinized,

confused, overgrown children. We are not attracted to weakness in each other.

We only want weakness from the other sex when we ourselves feel insecure

and powerless to them. The truth is, we all enjoy freedom. And free will is

a precondition of your life, it's an absolute. We enjoy the freedom

to being able to choose to work or to stay home with the kids regardless

of what gender we are. But the secret that no one wants to talk about is that

we all love gender roles. We just have no idea how to maintain them and not hurt

ourselves and other people at the same time. One day our race will have