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  • Let me ask you this when you were an intern,

  • and you, I know that you were very young

  • when you intern for us,

  • you were like 19 years old.

  • I think I was 19.

  • I was Yeah.

  • You at the time,

  • must have been interested in comedy.

  • Sometimes, it's hard for interns because there's they're

  • told you got to be professional,

  • you can't approach right famous people were you given

  • that whole spiel.

  • They gave me the

  • whole speech at the beginning.

  • Don't talk to famous people don't talk

  • to the guests.

  • But then Jonathan Katz came on the show one time

  • and he was from, from Dr. Katz, professional therapists,

  • Hilarious, hilarious comedian,

  • one of them one of the great TV series

  • of comedy nerds like me,

  • and he lived in worked in Boston,

  • and my brother Joe,

  • who had interned on your show as well,

  • was living in Boston was an

  • aspiring comedy writer.

  • And so I was,

  • I was like,

  • I'm going to introduce Jonathan Kartz

  • to my brother Joe.

  • So I, I completely cross the line.

  • And I just follow, I got out of the control room,

  • I spot him after he walks offstage,

  • and I follow Jonathan Katz.

  • And I'm like,

  • I'm gonna talk to Jonathan Katz.

  • He makes a right turn into the bathroom,

  • and I had that fork in the road moment

  • where you go,

  • should I follow a celebrity comedian

  • into a public restroom?

  • And the answer,

  • Conan is yes,

  • I went.

  • I waited until he was washing his hands.

  • And then I said, Jonathan,

  • I'm Mike Birbiglia.

  • I work on the show.

  • I didn't say I was an intern.

  • But I was wearing a nice shirt.

  • And I and I looked 50 when I was 20.

  • So I had a high, high hairline.

  • my hairline was this since I was 13, basically.

  • And you could have been a producer for all he knew

  • I couldn't produce right.

  • I go, my brother Joe is aspiring copywriter in Boston.

  • Can I put him in touch with you?

  • He goes, Oh, yeah,

  • he's soft spoken guy.

  • He goes, Oh, yeah, absolutely.

  • He goes, let me just write my number down.

  • Do you have anything that I could write it in?

  • And I was just like, Oh, well,

  • these paper towels.

  • I think I could,

  • we could write it down.

  • And so then I,

  • we I took out a paper towel.

  • He wrote down his number,

  • put him in touch with Joe

  • and Joe worked for him for several days.

  • And yeah, so I overstepped and actually,

  • if I, don't know if this is inappropriate.

  • I know this is your talk show.

  • I don't know if this is the time

  • or the place.

  • But I was.

  • My brother Joe is trying

  • to figure out his life right now.

  • He was an intern for you.

  • 20 years ago,

  • and I was wondering if you would take a meeting with him.

  • If I could give him your number.

  • Oh, it's on the line to ask me

  • on the air.

  • It's

  • No, wait.

  • Joe's here now.

  • No,

  • That's my brother. Joe.

  • This is inappropriate.

  • It's one thing for you and I to talk

  • off the air.

  • And for me to give you my number

  • to have Joe appear on the show

  • is way over the line.

  • Joe, it's over the line.

  • This is wrong.

  • I'll show myself out.

  • No, no, Joe, please stay.

  • How are you? Joe?

  • Where are you?

  • Am well, I'm in Rhode Island.

  • so my home.

  • You both are in Rhode Island.

  • Yes.

  • Okay.

  • We're and this is near Providence?

  • Yes.

  • Right outside of Providence.

  • Okay.

  • big snowstorm coming down.

  • It's coming down right now.

  • Okay.

  • Let me tell you my Rhode Island story.

  • Okay, now that you're here, and yes,

  • I'll do anything I can for you.

  • But I'll say to you,

  • that is this though, Joe.

  • I will help you

  • in any way I can.

  • Your brother has four cameras.

  • I have one.

  • I think you're talking

  • to the wrong guy.

  • You ready for my Rhode Island story,

  • Please.

  • My grandfather had a little cottage down

  • in Rhode Island.

  • We didn't have a summer place when I

  • was growing up.

  • So we would go and we visit my grandfather

  • in the town.

  • There's a fancy

  • town nearby called Watch Hill,

  • there was this big mansion

  • on a hill.

  • So many, many years later,

  • I'm walking through that town.

  • And I buy there's a nice painting of

  • that mansion on a hill

  • that looks out at the sea

  • and Rhode Island.

  • I buy it. And I'm like, this is cool.

  • This reminds me of my youth.

  • My grandfather hanging out with my brothers

  • and sisters going to the State Beach.

  • This is really cool.

  • And I put it up

  • on my wall.

  • Lo and behold about five years after I do that,

  • Taylor Swift buys that mansion,

  • completely re does it

  • and it becomes Taylor Swift's like Graceland.

  • Literally, there's like musical notes

  • on the gate.

  • it's this big thing.

  • People hang around out front to try

  • and see Taylor Swift.

  • I have that painting.

  • And I put it

  • in our guest room here at my house

  • in Los Angeles.

  • So these people come to stay with me

  • and I'm showing in the guest room

  • and they say what's that a painting of

  • and I went,

  • that's my painting

  • of Taylor Swift's

  • and everyone's like,

  • You're a fucking freak.

  • You're a creep.

  • You're a creep.

  • And I didn't explain that.

  • I had it long.

  • It's like,

  • I had a painting made

  • of her home.

  • And I'm gonna marry her someday

  • because I love taking

  • swift and now the Mr. Swift.

  • That's my story.

  • I just want you

  • to appreciate my Rhode Island roots.

  • Joe had one story that I thought was really funny

  • about being an intern.

  • I go, Do you have a memory of being

  • on the show?

  • Yeah, Joe You were an intern for us?

  • What do you remember?

  • I was and one of the the honors

  • of being the intern was that he would

  • once a week it will be your job to order

  • and dinner for Conan ,Andy Richter

  • and the writers throw their, write their initials.

  • Joe you know this is Conan.

  • Right?

  • I know that.

  • It's been a long time since Joe,

  • A, work for me

  • or B, watch the show.

  • So he right now thinks he thinks he's talking

  • to a very pleasant middle aged Irish woman.

  • So the question was when I was

  • ordering the dinner, because I'm,

  • I'm 20 years old at the time,

  • and you're stressful working television

  • for the first time like that.

  • And it's, the question was,

  • can I put Conan CEO initials

  • on his dinner?

  • Or would someone trying to kill him?

  • Perhaps?

  • Guess what, guess what?

  • There were people out

  • to kill me then.

  • And actually, they weren't on the same network as me.

  • So

  • one of them was one of them was Jay Leno.

  • I know which;

  • one it is with that?

  • What's funny, Conan eating?

  • Wait, can I just borrow it for a second?

  • There you go.

  • Take care of that little now

Let me ask you this when you were an intern,

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How Mike Birbiglia Got His Brother A Job With Jonathan Katz - CONAN on TBS

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    林宜悉 posted on 2021/02/04
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