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  • When I planted the trees, a young person said to me,

  • 'Why do you waste your time like that?'

  • So I said, 'In what sense?'

  • She said, 'You won't see it grown.'

  • But for me, planting a tree was never a waste of time.

  • And today, so often if I walk outside

  • and I can sit under the shade,

  • you enjoy that growth.

  • It just makes you aware that life is

  • so full of its own mysteries,

  • its own stories,

  • its own life.

  • Life goes through its own circles.

  • It's never even - it goes up and down.

  • And it can throw you totally overhead.

  • But you know what... I can't control everything.

  • I was with my husband when he passed away.

  • It's a strange emotion that went through me.

  • It was early in the morning and I walked around the house

  • and you are forlorn because you think,

  • how can I carry on?

  • And yet it was so unbelievably beautiful.

  • The sun came up

  • and all I can remember was how beautiful the world was around me.

  • It gave me so much courage, to realise but

  • you are still here and you can still go on.

  • You can't describe it to someone.

  • And that's life... that is not death... that's life.

  • It is a loss... I'm not saying that it's not a loss.

  • You're not superman.

  • Don't touch me. Handle with care. This side up.

  • You get days like that.

  • Someone said to me, 'How are you?'

  • And I said 'Fine'.

  • And he took my shoulders, turned me around and said

  • 'How is it really with you today?'

  • And suddenly I broke.

  • And he took me in his arms and he said

  • 'Elrieda, you may cry.'

  • And he just held me.

  • You must cry because that is good for the eyes

  • and the soul.

  • You have to get the eina (pain) out.

  • And you have to make peace.

  • You're not going to make peace if you keep saying 'fine'

  • and it's just superficial.

  • When people say to you 'Oh, I'm fine'.

  • Are you fine? No, I'm not fine.

  • So why do you say you are fine?

  • Try and get behind that.

  • That 'fine' is very often just a cover.

  • Very often people say more

  • without saying something.

  • You must listen behind the words.

  • What does that person need today?

  • For what they need now in this moment

  • is not what they're going to need next moment.

  • Give them your full attention.

  • Move the dirty dishes to one side

  • and give them a nice cup of tea.

  • To give them time to just sit with you...

  • to just be...

  • give them time to be.

  • Show your emotions, emotions are there to show.

  • The cattle lick each other

  • or bump each other when they don't feel like it.

  • So why must we always be polite?

  • As children, someone asked my mother,

  • 'Aren't you worried? Your children are forever fighting.'

  • She said, 'No, if they stop fighting I take them to the doctor.'

  • 'Because they've got different personalities.'

  • 'And each one must be free to express their personality.'

  • 'But they are also free to accept what comes from the other side.'

  • Getting cross and saying your say is also a form of

  • getting to understand each other better.

  • And try to understand the other person.

  • Is that not life?

  • I must say, I like trees that lose their leaves in winter.

  • Because when the new ones come out

  • you see living again.

  • Like the tree, you will get new leaves when spring comes.

  • To all of you who have contributed,

  • for those of you who have shared our films,

  • for those of you who have written out comments,

  • this journey is just beginning.

  • And we've put a Patreon link below our films

  • so if you'd like to continue to support us

  • we'd love for you to donate below. Thanks so much.

When I planted the trees, a young person said to me,

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