First, the lights will flicker on and off.

- Next-- - Dude.

- Can I have some ketchup? - Oh, here you go.

Next, the phone will ring and there will be nobody there.

And finally, the Hash-Slinging Slasher

arrives in the ghost of the bus that ran him over.

Then he exits the bus and crosses the street without looking both ways

because he's already dead!

Then he taps on the window with his grizzly spatula hand.

No.

He opens the door.

He slowly approaches the counter!

And you know what he does next?

- What? - You really want to know?

- What? - Are you sure you want to know?

What, what, what does he do?!

He gets ya!

[laughing]

[laughing]

SpongeBob...

SpongeBob, I was--

I was just--

I was just--

SpongeBob, I was joking!

- What? - It's not true! None of it's true!

It's not?

Of course not! Nobody has a spatula for a hand!

It was all a joke!

Oh...

[laughing]

[scrubbing]

Isn't this great, Squidward?

There's never time to wash the ceiling during the day.

Open 24 hours a day, what a stupid idea!

Who wants a Krabby Patty at three in the morning?!

Oh, boy! 3:00 AM!

Just look at this place!

It's like a ghost town in here.

Very funny, SpongeBob.

- What? - And the lights will flicker on and off.

Just like the story. I get it.

Hey, Squidward, how are you doing that without moving the switch?

I'm not doing it.

It must be the stupid, faulty wiring in here.

This place isn't built around 24 hours a day!

What? What? Hello?

Hello?

- Hello? - Nice try, Squidward.

Nice try, what?

"The phone will ring and there will be no one there!"

You crack me up!

SpongeBob, I'm not doing this!

Calm down. Calm down.

All right, what was it?

There was the lights...

and the phone...

and the walls will ooze green slime!

Oh, wait, they always do that.

But what was that third thing?

I didn't know the buses ran this late.

They don't.

Well, they're dropping someone off.

The Sash-Ringing...

the Flash-Singing...

the Bash-Pinging...

The Hash-Slinging Slasher!

At last you understand! We're doomed!

No, that's not it.

I am just so touched that you would go through the trouble

to dress up as a ghostly fry cook and stand on the other side of the street,

just to entertain me!

You must really like me!

SpongeBob, there are two problems with your theory.

One, I hate you.

And two, how can that be me when I'm standing right here!?

[screaming]

[both] The Hash-Slinging Slasher!

Get away from me!

He's going to flip me! Get away! Get away!

SpongeBob, no matter what I've said, I've always sort of liked you!

Squidward, I used your clarinet to unclog my toilet!

Get away! Get away! You're not welcome here!

Can I have a job application?

I brought my own spatula.

I called here earlier, but I hung up 'cause I was nervous.

Do you have references?

Wait, if that was you on the phone and you on the bus,

then who was flickering the lights?

[together] Nosferatu!