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  • (bright playful music)

  • (crowds chattering)

  • (dogs barking)

  • - I'm Tanya.

  • I've run the adoption every Saturday

  • for the last two years.

  • I love seeing new pets into new homes.

  • There's really nothing like it.

  • Always glad to see the happiness on their faces

  • when they decide to get a new one.

  • I've got none of my own.

  • I wouldn't treat the little one right.

  • But, I love seeing others be happy.

  • Besides, I've got two humans

  • that drive me up the damn wall, already.

  • - Fill out this one with your address,

  • fill out that with your social security,

  • do not let the cat outside,

  • do give him love, and--

  • - Can I declaw?

  • - Do not say declaw in this establishment.

  • Moving on.

  • Do not let the--

  • I'm Marta, I'm 14, and I help my mom here at the shelter.

  • I'm the third smartest in my class,

  • and that's only because I don't take pre-calc,

  • which the second and first smartest are,

  • but I don't see the need for calculus

  • in what's turning into a mainly simple mathematical world.

  • It's called foresight.

  • I like Adventure Time and old Oprah episodes,

  • as well as One Direction and animal rights.

  • - Her dad's Hispanic.

  • My ex-boyfriend.

  • I wouldn't call him a dick,

  • and I wouldn't say say that I don't like him.

  • I would say that he didn't come home

  • six out of seven nights,

  • and walked out on us when she was five months.

  • - Since they're kittens, they're--

  • Hi, I'm Liliane.

  • I'm 16.

  • I do new pet shopping at the center.

  • It's whatever.

  • It can be fun, I guess.

  • Ugh, do not look at my phone case,

  • I need to get a new one.

  • I'm very over One Direction.

  • Super in love with Zane, though.

  • He's so sexy, now.

  • I have 1,435 followers on Instagram,

  • and I have the best boyfriend in the entire world, Shane.

  • We've been together for one month.

  • - Are you filming?

  • - [Liliane] Yeah!

  • - What?

  • Yeah!

  • Hi, babe.

  • - Oh, the other day, he went with me

  • to get my eyebrows done.

  • Cute, right?

  • And he serves, are you still rolling?

  • - Liliane?

  • Different dad.

  • My other ex.

  • My first ex.

  • I wouldn't call him a dick, either,

  • just a guy that had another girlfriend

  • and another daughter he forgot to tell me about.

  • So,

  • no.

  • Maybe, I'd call him a loving multitasker?

  • - So, you're gonna need cat litter, for sure.

  • Two bags should do the trick.

  • - Do I need it?

  • - Well, yeah,

  • I mean, where do you expect the cat to poop?

  • - Do they poop that much?

  • - Yeah, like, normal amounts, like

  • just like you.

  • Well, maybe not just like you,

  • 'cause you're, like, a man or whatever.

  • - What?

  • - How's everything going?

  • - Listen, do I really need that much cat litter?

  • Are their poops as big as mine?

  • - How about instead of two bags,

  • we give you one case to start out with.

  • - Thank you, that sounds great.

  • - Mom, the case is the same price as the two bags.

  • - I know, Honey, but sometimes,

  • you gotta learn how to deal with customers,

  • and give them enough kitty litter to hold the bullshit.

  • - No

  • declawing!

  • - I didn't say declawing.

  • I just wondered if there was a way that--

  • - No.

  • - I could maybe-- - No.

  • - Stop the cat from scratching the furniture?

  • - You could clip his nails.

  • We could do it for you.

  • Come here, Snowflake.

  • - But won't they just grow back?

  • - I'm sorry, when you clip your fingernails,

  • do they just stay clipped forever,

  • or are you a magic person?

  • No?

  • Well, this isn't a magic cat.

  • - Just clip his nails.

  • - I'd be happy to.

  • Excuse me, Michelle.

  • - Yeah.

  • You want some?

  • They're for cats and people.

  • - Nope, no thanks.

  • - I know what you're thinking,

  • but they're delicious.

  • - That's Michelle.

  • Not the best with people.

  • Loves cats.

  • She's our neighbor, and she comes in

  • on Saturdays to help out.

  • - I really love cats.

  • Not all animals, just cats.

  • I had 11 cats growin' up..

  • They were named after The Jackson 5

  • and The Partridge Family.

  • I had a cat,

  • Pickles,

  • but he ran away.

  • And I can't get a new one,

  • because my landlord won't allow it,

  • but I'm gonna move soon.

  • So, it'll be great.

  • But it'll be sad, because I won't be near my best friend.

  • - Awe.

  • Yeah, I guess she is my best friend.

  • Michelle has lived by me through both exes,

  • both births.

  • She knows everything.

  • I almost know everything about her.

  • She does have a cat birthmark

  • on her tush.

  • - Right there.

  • - Yeah.

  • - I think it's a stray, I'm not sure.

  • - Okay, it's pretty. - Thank you.

  • - Good day, today.

  • 10 kitties in new homes.

  • - Actually, that last customer made 11.

  • She'll be back for shots on Tuesday.

  • - Great!

  • - Great, can I go now?

  • - It's not five o'clock yet.

  • - Yeah, I know, but no one's coming in anyway,

  • and I really wanna meet Shane for ice cream down the street.

  • - You'll leave at five, this is a job, not playtime.

  • - That's for sure.

  • I didn't ask for this job, by the way,

  • you're technically making me work it.

  • It's like child labor laws.

  • - Not when you're a volunteer.

  • - It's okay, she can go, I'll clean up.

  • (gasping)

  • - Thank, you Michelle! - No problem.

  • - Get back here, young lady,

  • I didn't say you could go,

  • and I don't like Shane.

  • - Me neither.

  • - No one asked you, Marta.

  • You don't even like boys.

  • - I do, I'm just not on a one-way train

  • to becoming a pregnant slut anytime soon, like you!

  • - Take it easy!

  • I was once a pregnant slut.

  • You're welcome.

  • Liliane, you're staying.

  • (bells chiming)

  • - Come to the store five minutes before it...

  • Shit.

  • - Watch your mouth.

  • Shit.

  • - What do we do?

  • - What's wrong?

  • (screaming)

  • - That's Leslie McGee.

  • She's a serial adopter.

  • She's already adopted 12 cats from us.

  • There's no way you can house that many cats

  • and actually be taking proper care of them.

  • (metal clanging)

  • She's gotta be mistreating them,

  • we just can't prove it, yet.

  • - She's evil.

  • She's what happens when cat love goes wrong.

  • - She either has a psychological problem,

  • or is reselling her cats on the black market.

  • Either way, I'm not helping her out today.

  • - She's a cat abuser.

  • Okay, she doesn't even give them a good home.

  • I've been to her apartment.

  • She once tried to start a cat club

  • between the two of us.

  • She kept them in a cage

  • during the day.

  • - It was just bizarre.

  • Isn't that just bizarre?

  • Oh, I know!

  • - That lady is a serious cat hoarder.

  • I snapchatted a photo

  • of her walking her cat down Burke Street the other day.

  • She is so weird.

  • - She's the devil!

  • - Oh, she also found Michelle's cat when he ran away,

  • and kept him.

  • - The devil.

  • - How can we help you, Leslie?

  • - Yes, hello.

  • Good afternoon, Tanya.

  • Lovely to see you again.

  • This little Tabby is beautiful.

  • - Yes he is, and he needs a good home.

  • - Don't they all?

  • Ah, look at those little paws, and the whiskers.

  • - Wafer's already adopted.

  • - Oh really?

  • I didn't see an adoption tag.

  • - That's because it fell off,

  • and we don't have any more, so--

  • - He's still here,

  • which means he hasn't been taken yet,

  • so there's still a chance?

  • - It's me, I'm adopting him.

  • - What about your landlord?

  • - I don't know, I'll figure it out later,

  • I just don't want her to take him.

  • - Really?

  • Let me see your adoption papers, then.

  • - Yeah, of course.

  • Adoption papers, yeah, I got that.

  • Oh, there it is.

  • - Oh, actually, I couldn't quite see that.

  • - That's them, so--

  • - I actually couldn't,

  • you held them so fast - Here it is.

  • - If you look at 'em. - I couldn't actually see.

  • - Don't touch it! - I'd like to--

  • - Well.

  • Good for you, Michelle.

  • I guess I'll just wait till he runs away

  • like your last cat, and I'll take him in then.

  • - Okay, stop, Leslie.

  • - What?

  • It's not my fault if cats don't like her.

  • - Enough.

  • I am done servicing you, today.

  • You are a mean person, mean,

  • and apparently, can't handle the love of a cat.

  • So, from this day onward,

  • you can find yourself another adoption center.

  • - You can't do that.

  • I'll report you for denying services

  • to animals in need.

  • - We can and we will.

  • Oh, and by the way,

  • your skirt is three seasons old,

  • your sweatshirt was never a thing,

  • your hair looks like you used an iron on it