Name: Jimmy Tries Out Republican Excuse Generator
Uploaded: 2020-07-03T09:25:17.000Z
Duration: 4 min 53 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

-You guys, I want to say congrats to the New York Yankees,

who are moving on to the American League Championship Series.

who are moving on to binge-watch season 8 of "Friends."

Yeah, you could tell the Yankees were feeling good

Today, the White House stopped an important ambassador

Yep, Trump told his staff to do whatever it takes

And his staff was like, "Okay," and duct taped his mouth shut.

The White House blocked our E.U. Ambassador Gordon Sondland

from testifying about the Ukraine scandal.

Because nothing says we've got nothing to hide like saying,

Can we see what Gordon Sondland looks like?

Looks like an accountant for the Addams family.

He looks like a guy who rents a Ferrari for his high school reunion.

He looks like a lawyer who claims he only collects money if you get paid.

has a bunch of text messages about Ukraine,

but the State Department won't give them to Congress.

When she heard that, Hillary Clinton was like,

"Russia, if you're listen, I hope you're able to find

Oh, and get this -- I heard that when the whistle-blower

they might disguise his appearance and his voice,

which means there's a good chance the President

is about to be brought down by guy dressed as a Minion.

And I read that, since the impeachment inquiry began,

White House officials have been dodging interviews

Apparently, they even got their own excuse generator

to come up with reasons why they can't talk.

For example, when they asked Attorney General William Barr

..."I would, but I'm working as a John Goodman impersonator."

-Next, when they asked Senator Rand Paul, he said...

..."I can't move the appointment for my perm."

-Got to keep it tight! Tight! Tight! -Tight!

-Next, when they asked Housing Secretary Ben Carson,

..."I'm busy practicing for 'Dancing with the Stars.'"

-Oh, well, yeah. -That's going to be good.

-And, finally, when they asked Rudy Giuliani --

-When they asked Rudy Giuliani for an interview, he said...

..."Sorry, I'm having a colonoscopy as we speak."

-Now, today, Trump had lunch with Vice President Mike Pence.

You can tell Trump's paranoid about leaks

because, before the meeting, he frisked Pence

He's like "Wow, you're like a Ken doll everywhere."

It's a bad situation 'cause the NBA needs China

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Jimmy Tries Out Republican Excuse Generator

apparently

applause

binge

pronounce