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  • - The wifi in this hotel is totally unsecured.

  • It would be unfortunate if someone decided to exploit that

  • for their own gain.

  • (laughing)

  • (upbeat music)

  • Yeah, I got them this fancy blender off

  • of their wedding registry, but let me ask you something.

  • Let's say this doesn't work out.

  • Not saying it won't, but let's say in a few years,

  • things are not so great, can I then go ask them

  • for that blender back?

  • The mosquitoes have died off, the birds have flown south,

  • the children are locked in their classrooms,

  • and the world is slowly turning into a desolate graveyard.

  • Finally, I can go outside in peace.

  • Dude, it is beautiful out here.

  • Just think of the graphics card and the RAM you would need

  • to run this at 60 frames a second.

  • I left the house for the first time in six months

  • and it appears that the sunlight has blinded me

  • and I also have a pretty sunburn.

  • Climate change is a major issue that we must face.

  • Just last winter, I had to leave my house

  • and shovel snow off my driveway.

  • I got blisters on my hands, I caught a cold,

  • I even went snow blind.

  • Never again, we need to warm this place up way faster.

  • I've heard you're not supposed to say stuff like bomb

  • and terrorist in this line, is that true?

  • Despite me bombing here today and none of you laughing,

  • I think I have proven the hypothesis

  • that leaving the house is not worth it.

  • Okay, so far so good.

  • Can I really not just figure this out on my own?

  • Crap, all right, let's see if other people can help me.

  • Ah, English class, the period where I can zone out,

  • draw some D and D maps, and still somehow pass

  • by reading CliffNotes.

  • Here's our next word problem, everybody.

  • Susie goes to the supermarket to buy bananas.

  • There are six bananas in each bunch.

  • If Susie eats 32 bananas a day, I'm sorry,

  • why is she eating 32 bananas a day?

  • What is wrong with her?

  • I mean, when you think about it, even real money

  • is actually worthless, you know what I mean?

  • - [Interviewer] Why should we hire you?

  • - That's kind of a dumb question.

  • Oh, so you're gonna pay me with cash that you're pulling out

  • of your bra?

  • Great, thank you, oh it's totally soaked through

  • with your bra sweat, very cool.

  • I'm sorry, sir, I cannot take the automatic gratuity

  • off the bill.

  • I really wish I could.

  • $4 an hour, that's sufficient for me.

  • What do I need a gratuity for?

  • (upbeat music)

- The wifi in this hotel is totally unsecured.

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B1 US susie blender bra upbeat music upbeat driveway

Funny 16 Personalities Highlights (INTP Only!)

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    Mahiro Kitauchi posted on 2020/06/15
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