she´s smart, she´s fun.

She´s different from most of the girls I´ve been with.

So call her up, Romeo.

Why? So I can realize she´s not that smart?

That´s she´s fucking boring?

You know what I mean..

You don´t... This girl is like fucking perfect right now,

I don´t wanna um- ruin that.

Maybe you´re perfect right now, maybe you don´t wanna ruin that?

But I think that´s a super philosophy, Will,

that way you can go through your entire life without ever having to really know anybody.

My wife used to fart when she was nervous.

She had all sorts of wonderful idiosyncrasies.

You know, she used to fart in her sleep.

Sorry I shared that with you.

One night it was so loud it woke the dog up.

She woke up and gone like

"Oh was that you?"

I said yeah. I didn´t have the heart to tell her.

Oh God.

So she woke herself up?

Yes.

Oh, Christ.

Uh but Will, she´s been dead two years now

and that´s the shit I remember.

Wonderful stuff, you know.

Little things like that.

Ah, but those are the things I miss the most.

The little idiosyncrasies that only I knew about.

That´s what made her my wife.

Oh, and she had the goods on me too.

She knew all my little peccadillos.

People call these things imperfections,

but they´re not.

Aw, that´s the good stuff.

And then we get to choose who we let in to our weird little worlds.

You´re not perfect, sport.

And let me save you the suspense,

this girl you met,

she isn´t perfect either.

But the question is: whether or not you´re perfect for each other.

That´s the whole deal.

That´s what intimacy is all about.

Now, you can know everything in the world, sport,

but the only way you´re finding out that one is by giving it a shot.

You certainly won´t learn from an old fucker like me.

Even if I did know, I wouldn´t tell a piss ant like you.