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  • [instrumental music]

  • "Vulva"?

  • Alright. I panicked. Alright?

  • She...she took me by surprise, you know.

  • But, it wasn't a total loss.

  • I mean, uh, we ended up cuddling.

  • Whoa, you cuddled?

  • How many times?

  • Shut up. It was nice.

  • I didn't.. I just don't think

  • I'm the dirty-talking kind of guy, you know?

  • What's the big deal? You just say what you want to do to her

  • and what you want her to do to you

  • and what you think other people might

  • be doing to each other.

  • Look. I tell you what.

  • Try something on me.

  • Please be kidding.

  • Why not? Come on.

  • Just...just close your eyes

  • and tell me what you'd like

  • to be doing right now.

  • Okay. I'm, uh.. I'm in my apartment..

  • - Yeah...what else? - That's it.

  • I'm in my apartment. You're not there.

  • We're not having this conversation.

  • Alright, look, I'll start, okay?

  • - Joey, please. - C'mon, c'mon, alright.

  • Ready? Look.

  • Oh, Ross..

  • You get me so hot.

  • I want your lips on me now.

  • - Huh? - Hmm.

  • Alright. Now you say something.

  • I, uh, I really don't think so.

  • -C'mon, you like this woman, right? - Well, yeah.

  • - You want to see her again, right? - Sure..

  • Well, if you can't talk dirty to me

  • how you gonna talk dirty to her?

  • Now, tell me you want to caress my butt!

  • Okay. Turn around.

  • I just don't want you staring at me when I'm doing this.

  • Alright. Alright. I'm not looking. Go ahead

  • Okay.

  • [clearing throat]

  • I want..

  • Okay, I-I wanna... feel your..

  • ...hot, soft skin with my lips.

  • There you go!

  • Keep going. Keep going.

  • I, uh..

  • ...I wanna take my tongue, and..

  • ...and, and..

  • Say it.

  • Say it!

  • Run it all over your body until you're..

  • ...trembling with...with...

  • With..?

  • Funny story.

  • You're not gonna believe this.

  • It's okay, it's okay, I was always rooting

  • for you two kids to get together.

[instrumental music]

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