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  • miles short of your mascots.

  • Oh, yes, you go.

  • Yeah, I've got this is actually this has been the family for years.

  • This is a way since I was very my no drama I bought Shaun.

  • I guess you could believe in the same team when the airport returning home from a driver got my and bank something again was just to keep the team morale.

  • And in Tora Bora on main labels for the ideal.

  • But they never get cleaned and time from top alone.

  • So and what?

  • We're going to be disrespectful, but the crazy fuck u tollbooth theories in the Swiss make chocolate.

  • Right?

  • So we don't associate with blood, diamonds and Nazi gold.

  • Fuck you Sweat, Solin.

  • Some backup mascots.

  • Oh, yeah, no.

  • Sure had a plane.

  • She wants us to you, mate.

  • Stole that off the door.

  • More deal.

  • Metal.

  • Toblerone can go into a long haul.

  • Got on.

  • Jimmy is you fired me?

  • So make a big cash.

  • Done a bit of a deal.

  • Got sponsor for the show.

  • Show is now sponsored by a banister company.

  • It's actually my half brother Fabio's company.

  • It's called Fabio's banisters.

  • Give me 60 quid on Dhe All we have to do is a little little bit of advertiser.

  • Then we split up that you even notice.

  • Wait to see the film.

  • Shame with these doubt, but said the graphic sex made it very awkward.

  • Everyone in the cinema asked them to stop Theo on the show.

  • You're gonna be better on the numbers or the letters.

  • I think it's gonna be letters.

  • I think I'm a man of words because I spend half my time university studying English.

  • What would you do the other half?

  • That was captain of the school's kissing team.

  • The school's kissing team did a lot of practice.

  • Only your dad.

  • I would have you got a mascot?

  • Yes, I do have a mascot.

  • I've got paint, sir.

  • Is your master?

  • Yes, my mask.

  • What you make of that?

  • No.

  • Hi.

  • I'm not knocking on this show.

  • I put on my mask locked inside.

  • Just brought in comfort food to get me for it.

  • I put in the cake Another part of my mascot way.

  • See how far you get through the pizza and the cake during the show.

  • Finished way.

  • It is down now.

  • No eat.

  • It comes way working door to door salesman Johnny.

  • Yeah, I did.

  • Obey Did three nights.

  • Three nights?

  • What?

  • What did you sell?

  • When lots of people bought the council offices, I went door to door and often to service the older gas so we would come in and put on the £25 would service every device.

  • And that would cover you for the year.

  • So your initial call out charge would be covered under that 25.

  • Come.

  • I didn't know what you were gonna ask me about that inferno wearing this ridiculous back in.

  • Sure.

  • Naked women on it.

  • I'm not like flying helicoptered in.

  • Bob Thief was a woman by the book Colonel with the legs of Kimber.

  • Wait.

  • Just going door to door.

  • Let's move on.

  • That was a bit quiet.

  • I'll stand by my point.

  • Okay.

  • Time to go across once again to dictionary corner.

  • Greg, what have you got for us?

  • When I was an educator, Asai was for many years.

  • I was fortunate enough.

  • There was a guest speaker at the school.

  • I taught out and it was the ex champion boxer Chris you back.

  • Yeah, he very kindly came in for nothing to inspire the Children on.

  • He did a three and 1/2 hour lecture to them.

  • It was unusual, and it consisted of him telling some loose anecdotes.

  • Um, but he interspersed with very aggressive poems himself, which is shattered into the Children's faces.

  • And, you know, it was it was really inspiring.

  • Anyway, I realized afterwards, I didn't think I could do impressions.

  • I've never been to do impressions that I can do an incredible impression of Chris you bank because he inspired me that day.

  • I've realized that classic works of literature sound better through Eubanks voice.

  • Ah, what a wonderful treat for us all, I thought I present some to you before I do.

  • I'll tell you that my agent on every member of production I've spoken to on this show has made it very clear.

  • They think this is a terrible idea, Theo, that's coming After jumping on people, I have to take a walk after I take a while to get Chris's voice.

  • So bear with me after and what a waste of time culture, please.

  • And what west of times that was the edge off with, um, the age of foolishness.

  • Thank you.

  • Think something is.

  • It's actually a very good Nelson Mandela.

  • Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?

  • More lovely and more temperate.

  • Rough wins.

  • Just companion.

  • Hey, wouldn't you say pugilist a few times that?

  • See, that's that.

  • That's mean.

  • That's his key.

  • Word wasn't tough.

  • I tried.

  • What's up here?

  • Get us talking to Mei.

  • What the hell You're talking about a 1,000,000,000 in danger mouth.

  • I know what you're thinking.

  • It's our worst impressions.

  • I know what you're thinking.

  • Hey, Fire Six shots or five.

  • Thanks.

  • I kind of lost track.

  • Okay.

  • Yeah, I've got a few.

  • So I've got my lucky thesaurus that I justice being through thick and thin with that one.

  • My lucky calculator.

  • So those are there?

  • Those two lucky objects?

  • Last thing.

  • This fellow Tony, who is Tony Tony's?

  • Um uh, guy I met in in the Emirates on.

  • We've really connected on.

  • We've lost touch.

  • Yeah, it's basically Tony's.

  • Tony watches this even if it's on YouTube.

  • Just get in touch.

  • I thought we had way.

  • Did have something.

  • I didn't think it.

  • I know we did today.

  • Yes, I do have a mascot.

  • Actually, I am the last part of the show.

  • I was a little bit nervous.

  • I feel like I lost focus on it wasn't entirely together.

  • And so yeah, I've been Really I've been really trying my hardest on practicing with a really supportive motivating beatboxing friend, obviously.

  • So you don't really makes you feel better and more confident about myself is always testing me on on on things, Pancks.

  • A 1,000,000 Russ.

  • It like one name.

  • Just give us gold and all its or looking for a nine letter on this.

  • Possibly a show.

  • Busy, Busy.

  • Great.

  • So s so like Let's try another one now A ll God!

  • And again I want to go for 99 under Susie and beat boxer Beat box It'll brilliant Nothing.

  • No.

  • What's it or not?

  • Great with numbers now, John, remember?

  • Wasn't very good with numbers old and let me just see.

  • And 15 50 50 50 50 50 three a nine letter word Lee Mack Stead ings Amazing.

  • Nothing.

  • Nothing Beautiful of three.

  • Person, six.

  • Be honest.

  • Really Are you are surprises.

  • Everyone else killed inside.

  • I'm going calmly.

  • First time I had sex.

  • What does it mean when you put your Penis inside of steadying is a sort of something to do with maybe forms or something, like an area of land.

  • Well, I'm literally I've lost the ability to speak sense anymore.

  • I'm going to retire now.

  • Way get close up on John's face.

  • I've never seen anyone look shocked and disappointed.

  • Most embarrassing thing about getting and never in the history of the show as dictionary corner ever gonna bring down the whole show.

  • You must be a bit annoyed, John.

  • Our first numbers round.

  • OK, Jon and Sara, your turn to pick the numbers.

  • Sure.

  • Miles Sean and miles of one said again, Fingers on lips.

  • Heads pay attention.

  • It's the numbers round.

  • Ready?

  • Are you ready?

  • No.

  • He'd brought up.

  • Was whispering to me.

  • About what?

  • Why was he whispering to you about lovers, Don't you, Miles, I'm on the way.

  • Like the Swiss during the Second World War, I could see the good shine and the bad.

  • Yeah, okay.

  • Also, our first Oh, no!

  • Ah poll recently voted Peter Seraphim, which Britain's funniest comedian on that pole was his nan Mrs Sarafina, which your final word games?

  • Well, to be honest, Jimmy, I don't think that's any of your business.

  • Crossed the line there any words you're hoping will come up tonight abdicates.

  • I'm with Peter.

  • Theo.

  • What's the most common question you get asked benefits that I have enough this twice this year already, which is quite a common question.

  • And that is one of them was quite an elderly lady.

  • And she said, What does the D stand for in G spot?

  • It sounds like a guy calling this a gray from bag.

  • Who is the lucky guy who found it You've written a book about?

  • There's a woman called Beverly Whipple who actually discovered it and didn't want it named after her.

  • It was gonna be called Whipple's tickle, and she didn't She didn't want her name used on it.

  • And there's no part of the vagina that's named after a person that isn't named after a man with so much tonight, I've got another good vagina fact.

  • Yeah, Theo.

  • Gee, sport isn't actually a real thing, but the literacy is like 10 centimetres long.

  • Wow.

  • Okay, it isn't true.

  • It was originally called the Cleta.

  • Chris.

  • I'm going crazy.

  • I was actually in love sex with you.

  • Okay?

  • Only charge of the numbers.

  • It's Rachel Riley.

  • Rachel's clitoris is 10 cents way.

  • Have one of those.

  • Richard.

  • Have you got a mask?

  • Oh, yeah.

  • What do you got?

  • The film.

  • White chicks.

  • Have you seen this film like chips?

  • I've not seen this film.

  • Oh, it's a heck of a film.

  • I rewatched it recently.

  • What's remind me what happens in one.

  • Okay, so is a wonderful thing to FBI people.

  • Men, They're men.

  • They go undercover posing as to socialites.

  • White socialites.

  • I don't know that you need to say white in front of social.

  • Actually, they go undercover as white women s o light, as I say, in order to prevent them being kidnapped on what it does is it really allows a marvelous opportunity to toe to see things from a woman's point of view.

  • And if you see one tips, I think you'll really understand what it is to be a woman just down here.

  • So, little Dickie, he would mind covering for me for two seconds.

  • You've got the small talk guy right here.

  • They found her away.

  • Some of your witty and watch.

  • It starts with two undercover FBI people posing as Mexicans, and they do some wonderfully sensitive material.

  • Richard Fine.

  • Three, 62 5 75 and 50 on the target, 961 target was 961 Joe, Did you get it?

  • 1000?

  • Did you get it?

  • Yesterday?

  • I got the Oh, so awesome.

  • No way.

  • Number that way.

  • Yes.

  • Yes, that's your second.

  • That's exactly how Marlon Wayans has unveiled in the fashion show.

  • Thanks, Richard.

  • I was really looking forward to seeing that film.

  • Time to go over to dictionary corner, Nick.

  • What have you got for us?

  • I've got poem.

  • I'm testing my feelings.

  • I can share stalking and stalking the back page.

  • Here is a poem that is simply called busy Bee Busy bee.

  • Busy bee.

  • Why are you so busy?

  • Busy bee always in a tizzy.

  • Busy bee.

  • Busy bee.

  • Thank you for the honey.

  • Busy bee.

  • Busy bee.

  • I owe you more than money.

  • Busy bee.

  • I hope it never ends.

  • Busy bee.

  • Busy bee.

  • You are my only friend.

  • That was about bay I made friends with on a family holiday in Uruguay.

  • I called him a race.

  • It was a legend.

  • He just landed on your arm.

  • I've got another poem.

  • This one's called Butterfly.

  • Your chances you wouldn't do that to you and Shakespeare with you.

  • You have a beard.

  • Come on, May wake up with a way.

  • You're a fine figure of a man.

  • How do you stay in remarkable condition?

  • I didn't really, Jimmy.

  • I mean, I've got a type, so that certainly helps what I call Charlie going, Charlie.

  • That's for you, Theo.

  • That 12% of people in this country have got tapeworms, which actually makes the more popular than dogs.

  • How do you get a tapeworm?

  • Do you eat a worm on offstage?

  • You don't you get it off pork?

  • Yeah.

  • Yeah.

  • Always pork.

  • Yeah.

  • Always pull.

  • Get it off a off pork or not off anything else.

  • Another victory for the corn burger.

  • Wrote a song about it.

  • If you aren't again A tapeworm eats and pork.

  • You want to get a take my mates and pulled chicken.

  • Pave fish or egg.

  • Forget you won't get it.

  • Take Google If you get to pick, they can't see mother pigs.

  • How many times I have to explain?

  • You can only get it if you want to get in, take aways.

  • But they eat pork and then they get it and get it to the pork which came first.

  • The pig That was the big bang theory.

  • Tapeworms fluent, the pigs.

  • Some people say this version of countdown is less intelligent.

  • News.

  • Just in you get Take worms from May I just say that.

  • Say one thing.

  • Google could go fuck it.

  • So, Theo, take 10 and square.

  • It allowed in Countdown, actually.

  • Can you, Um, Cuba.

  • Sorry.

  • Okay, on.

  • Then.

  • I'd like you to square the fine for me, please.

  • I like it.

  • And then I'd like you to time top 25 by the to the other to wait.

  • And you got your knife mind blown.

  • That was amazing.

  • That was proper mass.

  • And you haven't used anything.

  • I was twice never been done before.

  • It's groundbreaking.

  • That's right.

  • One of those things could actually be done.

  • No, it's just being done.

  • Spine Richards.

  • Amazing maths.

  • No one got any points?

  • Their scores in the moment of Richard Rob have no point.

  • Like they even on their team.

  • But he just did something with it.

  • If you want to square and cube things, get a job in a fucking jelly factory way weakest.

  • Maybe the weakest Come back.

  • That's ever been jelly factory mate.

  • That's the worst thing that's ever been said.

  • You got a mascot this evening.

  • I have brought along.

  • This is genuinely true.

  • Actually brought along that my nan's ashes.

  • Jen, you literally now was always a big family countdown, and she always wanted to Come on.

  • So this is like things generally my nan's ashes.

  • It's no way.

  • Have a look.

  • Don't joke about it.

  • You're a real hole.

  • Had just pushed him.

  • Okay, 422.

  • Did you do?

  • Right?

  • You take that 122 way down.

  • Don't structure of any of the other numbers.

  • Stress.

  • She died.

  • That was it, Was it?

  • I got nothing.

  • Still few put.

  • Minus eight there.

  • 66 way.

  • Go on.

  • He doesn't work here anymore, but he keeps on turning up anyway.

  • It's Joe Wilkinson.

  • Yeah, Yeah.

  • Uh huh.

  • You're right, Joe.

  • Where have you been?

  • Up to make, um Well, um Well, cause you, uh, farm because you're a prick.

  • I'm gonna come back to being an inventor.

  • So started adventure again myself.

  • You quit.

  • This is actually one of my inventions.

  • It's actually a a baby proposed for adults only.

  • Downside is you need a giant is prepared to carry around.

  • This was mine!

  • Exclaimed door toffee.

  • Clint loves toffees.

  • My best idea.

  • We'll bring out.

  • Bring it on.

  • I should stress what?

  • They're over.

  • You know a better way when the UK strongest man is struggle in today?

  • Sure.

  • What was it?

  • What was your six?

  • Rejoined?

  • Rejoin.

  • Get Thank you.

  • Means a lot Island.

  • We've got bit by that I've joined up a pretty good theory about James.

  • Ivan?

  • Susie, Could they have done any better?

  • Yeah, they could have done, actually way Lerner, which is so we'll make strips.

  • Susie, can you confirm that?

  • Yes.

  • Make her small bits for horses.

  • You know, I could love in the works.

  • You know, those people especially designed to clean horses willies.

  • So there's people specially designed their people.

  • Their job is to go and clean horses.

  • Will is surely they do the rest of the whole swallow their way.

  • Especially heavily, Heavily unionized.

  • All right, all right.

  • Don't touch the US.

  • Did you pick up this information from a friend of mine was a comedian, actually, cos you I'm gonna find out.

  • Why would you care if your horse at a dirty way?

  • Some people the horses are gone national today.

  • I mean, well, that was fast, but what a dirty Penis.

  • So the end of that, both teams have six points.

  • You must get recognized by fans all the time.

  • You ever wish you could still fly under the radar?

  • My favorite time of the year is when I just get to go skiing and you have got do your hair and makeup.

  • You have gotta have all that awkwardness.

  • Just put a helmet on.

  • But it's new dawn.

  • No makeup.

  • It's great.

  • And actually, I brought my skiing stuff with actually, if I just met you because I'm pretty sure I would recognize you in skiing gear.

  • So I've got a beard on Viking horns and this is kind of my look so much more comfortable on.

  • It's warm.

  • And, um, you just don't have to have that awkward social.

  • Is that you?

  • Is it no house house?

  • Jimmy, That's a challenging wank.

  • Oh, sorry.

  • John.

  • Do you have a mascot?

  • I am actually awaiting the results of I've stood in the election for the countdown party, which I launched last year to get countdown fans voting.

  • Really?

  • So I've stood in the constituency of Wet Wang.

  • And I've got every hope of getting in with some of my key policies to enhance count.

  • Now, what are these policies?

  • Well, obviously a lot of countdown viewers are retired So bring the age of retirement down to 30.

  • That way I think a lot more people would watch Get a little okay, Don't need it.

  • Five letters that's round in it Then you could put in a nice grid.

  • But 26 is bullshit, innit?

  • A little rhyme at the end away we got a kicking current occur liquor We got a sexy s and a spicy Yes, Change the national anthem just to that Yeah, You could have words to do it if you want to But your words worked out.

  • What?

  • It is changing Not according to whatever left the situation is isa situation.

  • This is the new national anthem Everyone, this is Britain.

  • This is Britain.

  • This is Britain.

  • This is Britain.

  • This is Britain.

  • This is written This sis Britain is written is written is written.

  • I see Britain, Britain in Europe Now I love to sing that song to my mom just before we deport way lucky mascot This week.

  • You're lucky.

  • Max got I've got a lucky I've got a lucky pen.

  • I got it from a very unusual bookies.

  • I find it very useful.

  • I put a bet on.

  • I always use Claude.

  • This is called the morning stuff.

  • They wanted to be stuff to go head to head.

  • It's the numbers round just for you guys on John.

  • Your turn to pick.

  • Come on, Sean.

  • You wanna play along for fun?

  • Sort of personal battle between You could play the claw.

  • Why would I do that?

  • I've already got him.

  • Just check what's in it for me.

  • My pen.

  • There's enough lid off this, but it's actually a stuffed grizzly.

  • Practical really serves its purpose.

  • You playing along with miles?

  • Not for now.

  • All right, Money.

  • I won't spit on you when we're having sex tonight.

  • Good luck trying it.

  • Without spirit, I work in the fields.

  • You very kindly offered way.

  • No way, of course.

  • Is Susie Dent.

  • Theo.

  • 14 books about the derivations of words.

  • And you can find them all in your local library.

  • Just ask for the sleepy Go.

  • Bye.

  • Bye section.

  • Okay.

  • Susie, what have you been looking into recently for the glory holes stop necessary.

  • I know what you'd be looking into recently.

  • Ah, Palms about so very important to me about how come it's okay to name you, Willie, but it's not okay to name the fellas, Willie.

  • Next year, the Royals.

  • So my time's called hanging about in a train station.

  • Toilet name in people's penises.

  • Commuter on your way to work.

  • I'm gonna call yours Captain Birdseye because it looks like he's wearing a polo neck and winking at me.

  • Welcome.

  • I just named your Penis.

  • Oh, hello.

  • Train driver just met him for a piss.

  • I'm gonna co yours, Mrs Fans.

  • Be geography because you're small and wrinkly and have a birthmark down the side of your shelf.

  • You're welcome.

  • I just named your huh?

  • Okay.

  • Hello?

  • Please, Police Officer Helen, please offer.

  • So he's just been said to the toilets because they've had reports of someone.

  • You can't arrest me for naming.

  • Strangest.

  • You cannot didn't know that.

  • Oh, great.

  • Now I'm Elektronik.

  • Lee turned again.

  • If you wanna get a tapeworm, eat pork.

  • You want to get a take my mates and pope chicken pave fish or egg?

  • Forget you won't get it.

miles short of your mascots.

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