Now I say this because I've noticed a trend in a lot of men that I've worked with over the last decade and in myself, I used to beat the crap out of myself verbally in my head whenever I did anything wrong, whenever I didn't meet some unrealistic expectation I set for myself, I would lace into myself, what's wrong with you, you're such a POS, how could you do that, nobody else would get this wrong, you're so stupid, and I would just berate myself and in some ways I was trying to do that to leverage shame to try and propel me forward, to get better results.