Peter Fracken is in love with Alyssa Price.

Only, Peter doesn't know Alyssa Price.

And Alyssa Price has absolutely no idea who Peter Fracken is.

So you might ask why Peter is in love with Alyssa.

Well, it all started at the beach, when Peter saw her sitting in the sand.

She was the most beautiful person he'd ever seen.

And then, he choked on a hamburger.

When Peter recovered, the girl on the beach was gone.

A few months later, Peter was on his bicycle, passing the park.

He looked up and saw Alyssa Price on a swing.

She was the best swinger he'd ever laid eyes on.

He would have liked to have gotten off and said "hi", but he encountered a minor setback...

He ran over a squirrel and flew off.

When he awoke, the girl on the swing was gone.

This went on for several months.

Fate, or luck, or God (he didn't really know who to blame)

kept stepping in and cutting off his chances

of talking to the girl he wished he knew.

One day, Peter was sitting in a tree, reading.

The branch was comfortable, the weather was perfect, and he was content.

Suddenly, Opportunity knocked, and he felt obligated to answer.

Unfortunately, excitement and a bad inner ear don't mix well.

On the plus side, it gave him a chance to introduce himself.

This began the love story of Peter Fracken...

...and since there is so much more to tell

I must leave the rest to your imagination...

...which, I hear, isn't as bad as you may think.