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  • FOLKS, LET'S GET STRAIGHT TO OUR MARQUEE GUEST.

  • I'VE HAD THE PLEASURE OF INTERVIEWING MY FIRST

  • GUEST MANY TIMES, BUT THIS IS HIS FIRST LATE SHOW INTERVIEW AS

  • A U.S. CITIZEN.

  • PLEASE WELCOME BRIT-TURNED-YANK, JOHN OLIVER!

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( YANK DOODLE DANDY PLAYING )

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪

  • ♪ ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

  • ♪ ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

  • >> St( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: GOOD TO SEE YOU.

  • GOOD TO SEE YOU.

  • >> GOOD EVENING.

  • GOOD EVENING.

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) THANK YOU.

  • >> Stephen: DELIGHTFUL.

  • THANK YOU.

  • THANK YOU.

  • >> Stephen: WELCOME FELLOW AMERICAN.

  • >> THANK YOU!

  • >> Stephen: NOW, WAS THIS A LONG TIME COMING?

  • HOW LONG -- HOW LONG -- >> THIS WAS A LONG TIME COMING.

  • >> Stephen: YEAH?

  • I CAME TO AMERICA, MUCH LIKE EDDY MURPHY --

  • ( LAUGHTER ) I, TOO, AM A FICTIONAL AFRICAN

  • PRINCE.

  • I CAME HERE IN 2006 AND, SO, I HAVE BEEN KIND OF WANTING THIS

  • TO HAPPEN PRETTY SOON AFTER THAT.

  • >> Stephen: OKAY.

  • O IT'S BEEN OVER A DECADE.

  • >> Stephen: THAT'S PAR FOR THE COURSE.

  • IT TAKES A LONG TIME TO BECOME AN AMERICAN CITIZEN.

  • >> DEFINITELY RIGHT.

  • I HAD TO GO THROUGH A NUMBER OF VISAS, GREEN CARD, I STARTED

  • APPLYING FOR CITIZENSHIP AND IT TAKES LONGER BECAUSE THERE ARE

  • SAND IN THE GEARS, AND I HAD TO GET A SECOND GREEN CAMPLETD IT

  • WAS UNBELIEVABLY TENSE.

  • I'M INCREDIBLY RELIEVED.

  • >> Stephen: I UNDERSTAND THERE'S A TEST YOU HAVE TO TAKE.

  • >> I'M SLIGHTLY OUT OF BREATH, AND THAT IS ALARMING CONSIDERING

  • I'VE LITERALLY JUST BEEN CARRIED OUT.

  • >> Stephen: THAT'S NOT A GOOD SIGN.

  • >> I MEAN -- >> Stephen: HAVE A DRINK.

  • I DON'T KNOW WHAT A MEDICAL WARNING SIGN IS.

  • I BET YOU ALL SAW THAT.

  • >> Stephen: YEAH, SURE.

  • I DON'T THINK THAT SOUNDS AS CARDIO.

  • >> Stephen: YEAH.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) YEAH, RIGHT.

  • WELL, YOU'RE AN AMERICAN NOW.

  • >> THAT'S TRUE.

  • >> Stephen: YOU DON'T HAVE TO EXERCISE ANYMORE.

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) SURE.

  • YEAH.

  • >> CHEERS.

  • >> Stephen: CHEERS TO YOU, TOO.

  • >> PINKY FINGER DOWN.

  • >> Stephen: SURE.

  • AS A PROSPECTIVE AMERICAN CITIZEN, DO YOU HAVE TO TAKE A

  • TEST?

  • >> OF COURSE.

  • >> Stephen: I DIDN'T HAVE TO.

  • I WAS BORN.

  • >> OH, THAT'S RIGHT.

  • >> Stephen: I NAVIGATED THE BIRTH CANAL AND THEY HANDED ME

  • THE LITTLE THING WHEN I CAME OUT.

  • >> THERE ARE 100 DIFFERENT QUESTIONS.

  • THEY SELECT TEN TO FIRE THEM AT YOU.

  • >> Stephen: WHAT HAPPENED AT APPOMATTOX.

  • >> IT'S NOT EXACTLY THAT, BUT IT'S WHAT'S THE STATE CAPITOL,

  • WHAT'S THE PRESIDENT.

  • IT BECOMES REAL EVERY TIME YOU SAY IT.

  • >> Stephen: EXACTLY.

  • THE FIRST QUESTION IS WHAT IS YOUR PHONE NUMBER.

  • I WAS SO SCARED, I BLANKED.

  • SHE SAID, LET ME JUST CHECK YOUR SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER.

  • I SAID I DON'T KNOW THAT EITHER.

  • THIS ISN'T GOING WELL!

  • >> Stephen: DID THEY IMAGINE JOHN OLIVER WAS IMPERSONATING

  • SOMEONE ELSE?

  • >> I WAS TRYING TO EXPLAIN TO THEM WHY I WAS SO FRIGHTENED.

  • I WAS TRYING TO EXPLAIN TO MY WIFE, I HAVE BEEN ANXIOUS ABOUT

  • THIS FOR A DECADE, SO IT'S BEEN EVER PRESENT HUNG IN THE BACK OF

  • MY MIND.

  • THERE WAS PART OF ME EVEN THE AT A OF THE CEREMONY, I THOUGHT

  • THERE WAS GOING TO BE A TRAP.

  • THERE WAS A PART OF ME THAT LITERALLY THOUGHT THEY WOULD

  • OPEN THE DOOR AND THERE WOULD BE PLASTIC SHEETING ON THE GROUND

  • AND JARED KUSHNER WOULD BE SITTING THERE STROKING A

  • HAIRLESS CAT, SAYING, OH -- THAT WOULD HAVE MADE MORE SENSE TO ME

  • THAN THE THING THAT WAS HAPPENING.

  • >> Stephen: DID YOU HAVE TO RENOUNCE THE QUEEN AND HER

  • EMPIRE AND ALL THAT STUFF?

  • >> I DID THAT YEARS AGO.

  • SO -- ( LAUGHTER )

  • >> Stephen: WE'RE AMERICANS!

  • I'M A DUAL CITIZEN SO I HAVE TWO PASSPORTS LIKE JASON BOURNE.

  • >> Stephen: WOW!

  • YEAH, I CAN GO ANYWHERE, KILL ANYONE.

  • >> Stephen: I BELIEVE THAT'S WHAT IT IS, DUAL CITIZENSHIP.

  • >> I THINK HIS CONFIDENCE IN GETTING STRONG AND HURTING

  • PEOPLE REALLY CAME FROM HIS ABILITY TO LIVE AND WORK

  • ANYWHERE ON EARTH.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: YOU GET TO VOTE AS

  • AN AMERICAN.

  • ARE YOU EXCITED ABOUT THAT?

  • >> YES, THEY GAVE US THE OATH.

  • >> Stephen: IT MUST BE MOVING.

  • IT'S INCREDIBLY MOVING.

  • IT WAS 150 PEOPLE FROM 49 DIFFERENT COUNTRIES, ALL OF US

  • HAD BEEN WAIT AGO LONG TIME FOR THIS.

  • I HAD BEEN WAITING OVER A DEC DECADE, THE PEOPLE HAVE BEEN

  • WAITING 30 YEARS.

  • SO IT WAS A BIG DEAL.

  • THERE'S SOMETHING VERY INSPIRING ABOUT THE IDEA OF THESE PEOPLE

  • CHOOSING AMERICA, NOT JUST CHOOSING AMERICA BUT CHOOSING

  • AMERICA NOW -- ( LAUGHTER )

  • -- WHEN THE COUNTRY IS NOT AT ITS BEST.

  • ( APPLAUSE ) SO THAT'S THE POINT, LIKE

  • CHOOSING -- >> Stephen: THAT'S REALLY

  • HOPEFUL.

  • >> CHOOSING AMERICA NOW IS LIKE FALLING IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE

  • WHO'S VOMITING ALL OVER THEMSELVES.

  • I'M TAKING A FLIER THERE'S A GREAT HUMAN BEING UNDER HERE.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) IT WAS VERY INSPIRING TO WATCH

  • PEOPLE BUY INTO THE IDEA OF AMERICA WHICH OBVIOUSLY OUTLASTS

  • ANY PRESIDENT.

  • >> Stephen: AMERICA IS JUST AN IDEA.

  • THE LAND DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING, REALLY.

  • >> WELL, DON'T SAY THAT TO SOMEONE WHO'S STILL HALF BRITISH

  • TOO HARD, THE LAND DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING.

  • WELL, WE'LL TAKE THAT, THEN.

  • JUST ASK INDIA.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: I'VE SEEN A LOT OF

  • BREXIT RAH-RAH PATRIOTISM.

  • THERE'S NO UNCLE SAM TO CARRY YOU OUT IN ENGLAND.

  • >> I GUESS THAT'S TRUE.

  • IT COMES OUT NORMALLY AT SPORTING EVENTS.

  • THAT'S WHERE YOU GET THE LAND OF GLORY AND FLAGS WAVED AROUND.

  • >> Stephen: WHAT'S YOUR TEAM?

  • LIVERPOOL.

  • >> Stephen: LIVERPOOL.

  • MY FAMILY'S IN LIVERPOOL.

  • >> Stephen: OKAY.

  • I LOVE LIVERPOOL SO MUCH THAT THE FIRST GAME MY DAD EVER TOOK

  • ME TO I WAS EIGHT YEARS OLD AND I MADE HIM LET ME WEAR MY FULL

  • LIVERPOOL KIT AND SOCKS AND SHIN PADS AND CLEATS UNDER MY REGULAR

  • CLOTHES BECAUSE MY RATIONALE AT THAT AGE IS SOMEONE GOT HURT AND

  • RAN OUT OF PLAYERS, THEY MIGHT HAVE TURN TO THE CROWD AND SAY

  • DOES ANYONE HAVE THE NECESSARY EQUIPMENT TO PARTICIPATE?

  • AND I WOULD SAY, I DO!

  • I'VE COME PREPARED!

  • I CAN DO IT!

  • YES!

  • ( APPLAUSE ) I HAVE A LITTLE ENOUGH SENSE OF

  • CONSEQUENCES TO THINK THIS MIGHT GO WELL FOR ME!

  • >> Stephen: WE HAVE TO TAKE A BREAK.

  • >> YEAH.

  • >> Stephen: BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, COMMERCIALS.

  • >> SURE.

  • >> Stephen: WE'LL BE BACK MORE WITH JOHN OLIVER, EVERYBODY.

  • PLEASE STICK AROUND.

FOLKS, LET'S GET STRAIGHT TO OUR MARQUEE GUEST.

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