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  • (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) >> OKAY, THANK YOU FOR COMING

  • DOWN TO THE STATION, MR. DAIFS, WE HAVE A LINEU OF POTENTIAL

  • SUSPECTS WON'T MATCH THE ASSAILANT WHO ATTACKED AND

  • ROBBED.

  • YOU SAY MALE BETWEEN 25 AND 32 OF AGE, 6 FOOT 2, BROWNISH HAIR,

  • MUSCULAR BUILD, HIGH CHEEK BONE, CHISELED APPROXIMATE BONE.

  • >> IT IS ALL A BLUR, IF I SAW HIM AGAIN I MIGHT BE ABLE TO

  • I.D. HIM.

  • >> OKAY, LET'S BRING IN THE LINE-UP.

  • (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE).

  • >> James: I THINK THERE'S BEEN A MISTAKE.

  • I HAVEN'T ATTACKED ANYONE.

  • I'VE GOT AN ALIBI, FOR WHERE I WAS.

  • CAN I SPEAK TO MY LAWYER.

  • I DON'T BELONG HERE.

  • >> ALL RIGHT, QUIET.

  • >> YOU ALL MATCH THE SAME DESCRIPTION.

  • >> James: I MATCH THE DESCRIPTION-- IN OTHER WORDS,

  • YOU THINK THAT WE ALL LOOK THE SAME?

  • I MEAN SURE, YEAH, TOTALLY.

  • COME TO THINK OF IT, WHO KNOWSES WHERE I WAS LAST NIGHT.

  • >> ALL RIGHT PLRKS DAVIS, WHY DON'T YOU LOOK AT THE SUSPECTS

  • HERE AND SEE IF ANY OF THEM STAND OUT TO YOU.

  • >> KNOW, IT'S HARD TO TELL BECAUSE IT WAS DARK OUT.

  • BUT HE PULLED OUT A KNIFE AND SHOUTED, YOU KNOW, HAND OVER

  • YOUR MONEY IF YOU WANT TO LIVE.

  • >> ALL RIGHT, WAS THERE ANYTHING ELSE THAT YOU CAN TELL ME ABOUT

  • HOW HE SOUNDED?

  • >> HE HAD A VERY DEEP VOICE, LOW, DEEP, OTHER THAN THAT, IT

  • WAS JUST A REGULAR AMERICAN ACCENT.

  • >> RIGHT, RIGHT.

  • GOT IT ALL RIGHT, NUMBER ONE, SAY THE LINE.

  • >> HAND OVER YOUR MONEY IF YOU WANT TO LIVE.

  • >> MAYBE THAT SHIM, I DON'T KNOW.

  • >> OKAY, ALL RIGHT, NUMBER TWO.

  • >> HAND OVER YOUR MONEY IF YOU WANT TO LIVE.

  • >> I'M JUST NOT SURE.

  • >> THAT'S OKAY.

  • TAKE YOUR TIME, NUMBER THREE, SAY THE LI.

  • >> HAND OVER YOUR MONEY IF YOU WANT TO LIVE.

  • >> AGAIN, MAYBE, YOU KNOW, IT ALL HAPPENED SO FAST.

  • >> ALL RIGHT, NUMBER FOUR, NOW YOU.

  • >> HAND OVER YOUR MONEY IF YOU WANT TO LIVE.

  • (LAUGHTER) >> YEAH, NO, NO, IT IS

  • DEFINITELY NOT HIM, NO IT'S NOT, YOU, MAN.

  • >> I'M NOT WARMED UP, LET ME DO IT, YOU CAN'T HAND ME A LEMON OR

  • ANYTHING, I NEED IT.

  • >> ALL RIGHT, SO WHAT HAPPENED NEXT.

  • >> AFTER I REFUSED TO GIVE HIM MY MONEY, HE GRABBED ME, LIFTED

  • ME UP OVER HIS HEAD AND SLAMMED ME AGAINST THE WALL.

  • THEN WHILE I WAS DAZED, HE TOOK MY WALLET.

  • >> ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT SO NOW WHAT WE ARE GOING TO DO IS BRING

  • IN A BAR BELL THAT WEIGHS 170 POUNDSK ROUGHLY YOUR BODY

  • WEIGHT, AND SEE WHO IS ABLE TO LIFT IT.

  • >> OKAY.

  • >> ALL RIGHT, NUMBER ONE, LIFT IT.

  • >> OH, THAT IS A GOOD LIFT, YEAH.

  • >> ALL RIGHT, NUMBER TWO.

  • >> THERE ST, NICE JOB.

  • >> ALL RIGHT, NOW NUMBER THREE.

  • >> COME ON.

  • LET'S GET IT, DOUBLE PUMP, THAT'S WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT.

  • >> ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

  • LET'S SEE IT.

  • >> .

  • >> .

  • >> I MEAN-- YEAH, YEAH, I MEAN MEAN-- ALL RIGHT.

  • >> WAIT, WAIT.

  • WAIT!

  • >> WAIT!

  • >> YEAH.

  • >> WAIT!

  • >> NO, IT'S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN, MAN.

  • >> OKAYS COME ON.

  • OH, WOW.

  • >> I HAVEN'T GOT CHALK, HAVE YOU GOT ANY CHALK?

  • >> WOW, WOW, WOW.

  • >> NUMBER FOUR, YOU-- YOU DON'T HAVE-- YOU'RE CLEAR TO GO YOU

  • ARE CLEARLY NOT OUR GUY.

  • >> HANG ON, NO, WAIT, I AM A PERFECT MATCH FOR THE

  • DESCRIPTION.

  • >> NO, THERE IS NO WAY YOU COULD BEAT ME UP, OKAY.

  • YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE WHO COULDN'T LIFT THAT WEIGHT.

  • >> WELL, NO.

  • >> NOT EVEN CLOSE.

  • >> IF ANYTHING IT PROVED IT WAS ME BECAUSE I WAS OVEREXERTED

  • FROM HAVING THROWN YOU INTO THE WALL, YOU BROKE PUNK BITCH.

  • >> OKAY, OKAY.

  • >> NUMBER FOUR, I'M GETTING TOO OLD FOR THIS [BLEEP].

  • >> WOULD YOU PLEASE JUST LEAVE ALREADY.

  • >> YOU ARE DESCRIBING ME TO A T.

  • >> UH-HUH.

  • >> MUS MUSCULAR BUILD, HIGH CHEEK BONES.

  • >> NO.

  • >> CHISELED JAWLINE, GREAT SENSE OF HUMOR.

  • >> NO ONE SAID ANYTHING ABOUT A SENSE OF HUMOR.

  • I SAID POUTY LIPS.

  • >> HAVE I POUTY LIPS.

  • >> YOU DO NOT HAVE POUTY LIPS.

  • >> NO, I DO SO POUTY LIPS.

  • >> NUMBER THREE HAS POUTY LIPS.

  • >> KNEES ARE LIKE TWO.

  • >> NO, NO, THEY'RE NOT POUTY.

  • >> YOU ARE POUTY.

  • >> HEY, ENOUGH!

  • I WISH COULD YOU JUST LOCK SOMEONE UP FOR JUST BEING

  • ANNOYING, YOU KNOW.

  • >> WAIT A SECOND MR. DAVIS, ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY SURE THAT NUMBER

  • FOUR HERE ISN'T THE GUY THAT WE SHOULD BE ARRESTING?

  • YEAH, YOU KNOW NOW THAT I THINK OF IT, THE GUY ACTUALLY HAD A

  • BRITISH ACCENT AND HE WASN'T MUSCULAR AT ALL.

  • >> THAT IS WHAT I THOUGHT.

  • >> OFFICER, CUFF HIM.

  • >> WELL NO, HANG ON, HANG ON, I WAS KIDDING.

  • I WAX KIDDING TK WASN'T ME, I'VE GOT-- THESE ARE WAFERS, IT WAS

  • NUMBER THREE.

  • IT WAS NUMBER THREE.

  • >> (APPLAUSE)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) >> OKAY, THANK YOU FOR COMING

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James Insists He's the Sexy Suspect w/ Aaron Paul & Will Arnett

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    林宜悉 posted on 2020/03/07
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