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  • A BOOK THAT I

  • WROTE AND ILLUSTRATED BECAME A

  • NUMBER ONE NEW YORK "TIMES"

  • BESTSELLER.

  • "THE SERIOUS GOOSE."

  • ALL THE MONEY I MAKE FROM THE

  • SALE OF THIS BOOK GOES TO

  • CHILDREN'S HOSPITAL HERE IN L.A.

  • AND CHILDREN'S HOSPITALS ALL

  • OVER THE U.S.

  • YOU CAN BUY IT ANYWHERE THEY

  • SELL BOOKS AND IF YOU WANT AN

  • AUTOGRAPHED COPY GO TO

  • THESERIOUSGOOSE.COM TO GET ONE

  • SIGNED BY ME.

  • IN GREAT, BIG BLACK SHARPIE

  • JUST, LIKE THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES.

  • OUR FIRST GUEST TONIGHT IS A GOLDEN-NOMINATED

  • ACTOR AND RAPPER

  • AND BOTTLED WATER TOO.

  • YOU KNOW HER FROM THE MOVIE

  • "CRAZY RICH ASIANS."

  • STARTING TOMORROW YOU CAN SEE

  • HER ALONGSIDE DWAYNE JOHNSON AND

  • KEVIN HART IN "JUMANJI: THE NEXT

  • LEVEL."

  • PLEASE WELCOME AWKWAFINA.

  • [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

  • >> Jimmy: HOW YOU DOIN'?

  • HEY, CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR

  • GOLDEN GLOBE NOMINATION.

  • >> THANK YOU.

  • >> Jimmy: THAT CAME ON MONDAY,

  • RIGHT?

  • >> YES, CAME OUT ON MONDAY.

  • >> Jimmy: THAT'S A VERY EXCITING

  • THING.

  • >> YEAH, YEAH.

  • VERY EXCITING.

  • >> Jimmy: WAS IT VERY EXCITING?

  • WERE YOU UP WAITING TO HEAR IF

  • YOU'D GET NOMINATED?

  • >> UM, NO.

  • >> Jimmy: OKAY.

  • GOOD, GOOD.

  • >> AND NOT BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, I

  • HAD KOREAN BARBECUE THE NIGHT

  • BEFORE, AND IT WAS VERY RICH,

  • AND SO I, I FELL ASLEEP, AND I

  • WOKE UP, AND I SAW LIKE A FLEUR

  • EFLEURY

  • OF MESSAGES AS I WAS WAKING UP

  • AS IF SOMEONE DIED.

  • >> Jimmy: YOU'D FORGOTTEN WHAT

  • WAS HAPPENING?

  • >> YEAH, I DIDN'T, I WASN'T

  • REMINDED THAT THEY HAD COME OUT

  • THAT DAY.

  • >> Jimmy: I SEE.

  • >> YEAH, SO IT WAS THAT.

  • AND YEAH, BUT --

  • >> Jimmy: THAT WOULD BE WEIRD IF

  • SOMEBODY DID REMIND YOU, BECAUSE

  • THEN IT PUTS A LOT OF PRESSURE

  • ON BEING NOMINATED.

  • SOMEONE'S LIKE, BY THE WAY,

  • NOMINATIONS IN THE MORNING, AND

  • THEN IT'S LIKE, WHAT IF THEY

  • DON'T HAPPEN, THEN THAT PERSON'S

  • A JERK.

  • >> YEAH, SURE.

  • THE NOMINATIONS IN GENERAL, LIKE

  • THE WRONG DATE, NEVER MIND.

  • >> Jimmy: YOU KNOW WHAT I'M

  • SAYING.

  • IT'S ALL THIS KOREAN BARBECUE.

  • THAT KNOCKS YOU OUT, HUH?

  • >> KNOCKED ME OUT, YEAH.

  • IT WAS REALLY GREAT, THOUGH.

  • >> Jimmy: YOU BROUGHT SOMETHING

  • THAT I, TICKLED ME GREAT LAY.

  • YOUR FAMILY WAS VERY EXCITED.

  • >> YES, THEY WERE.

  • >> Jimmy: THEY START THE GROUP

  • TEXTING YOU.

  • >> YES.

  • >> Jimmy: EXPLAIN WHAT I'M ABOUT

  • TO SEE.

  • >> MY AUNT LINDA IS A LITTLE BIT

  • OF A NUT.

  • >> Jimmy: THERE'S ALWAYS AN AUNT

  • LINDA, AND SHE 'S ALWAYS A NUT.

  • >> IT WAS JUST AN ODD TEXT FOR

  • THE NATURE.

  • >> Jimmy: SO FIRST OF ALL, I

  • LIKE THE NAME OF THE GROUP,

  • WHICH IS AKWAFINA FAN CLUB.

  • CONGRATULATIONS, CONGRATS NORA.

  • THIS IS AWESOME.

  • YOU SAY THANK YOU GUYS, WHEN YOU

  • FINALLY WAKE UP.

  • THEN LET'S ZOOM IN ON AUNT

  • LINDA.

  • >> HERE WE GO.

  • >> Jimmy: SERIOUSLY, FAM, CURB

  • YOURSELVES OF GLUTEN, GRAINS AND

  • BEANS, READ UP ON LECTIN AND HOW

  • IT POISONS YOUR BODY OVER TIME.

  • TRY TO EAT ONE MEAL A DAY AND

  • CUT OUT CORN AND SOY, AND EVEN

  • THE ORGANIC KIND.

  • THE SEEDS ARE ALL GMO.

  • WHAT A BEAUTIFUL CONGRATULATIONS

  • THAT WAS FROM AUNT LINDA.

  • >> I KNOW, LOVE HER.

  • >> Jimmy: SO SHE IS NOT COMING

  • TO THE SHOW, I GUESS.

  • >> NO.

  • >> Jimmy: SHE'S NOT EVEN ALLOWED

  • AT THE FARMER'S MARKET, YOUR

  • AUNT LINDA.

  • >> I THINK SHE YELLS AT THE

  • PEOPLE AT THE FARMER'S MARKET,

  • SHE'S THAT TYPE.

  • >> Jimmy: SHE'S LIKE THAT.

  • >> AUNT LINDA.

  • >> Jimmy: NOTHING MORE THAT YOU

  • NEED TO SAY THAN THAT.

  • >> YEAH, PRETTY MUCH.

  • >> Jimmy: YOU USED TO WORK AT A

  • VIDEO STORE.

  • >> YES, I DID.

  • >> Jimmy: HOW LONG AGO WAS THAT?

  • >> WHEN I WAS 16 YEARS OLD.

  • JOIL

  • .

  • >> Jimmy: STILL AT THE END OF

  • VIDEO STORES.

  • >> WE'RE GETTING PUT OUT OF

  • BUSINESS.

  • THAT'S HOW WE OPERATED.

  • >> Jimmy: NOT GIVING YOU A RAISE

  • OR --

  • >> FOR EVERYTHING.

  • WELL, WE'RE GOING TO BE OUT OF

  • BUSINESS.

  • WE'RE GOING TO BE A THING OF THE

  • PAST.

  • >> Jimmy: DID THEY GO OUT OF

  • BUSINESS EVENTUALLY?

  • >> YES.

  • >> Jimmy: THEY WERE RIGHT.

  • >> EXACTLY.

  • >> Jimmy: DID YOU HEAR FROM

  • THOSE PEOPLE YOU USED TO WORK

  • WITH IN THE SENATOR.

  • >> YEAH, HE TEXTED ME.

  • IT WAS A GREAT STORE.

  • >> WERE YOU ACTIVE IN

  • RECOMMENDING FILMS TO PEOPLE,

  • THINGS YOU WANTED THEM TO WATCH?

  • >> YEAH, ALWAYS, THEY WOULD ASK

  • ME, AND I WOULD TELL THEM, YEAH.

  • >> Jimmy: WOULD THEY GET MAD IF

  • YOU RECOMMENDED SOMETHING AND

  • THEY HATED IT.

  • >> YES, THERE WAS ONE PERSON WHO

  • HATED "INCONVENIENT TRUTH".

  • AND THREE WERE LIKE, WHAT KIND

  • OF MOVIE IS THIS?

  • I WAS LIKE, A DOCUMENTARY.

  • >> Jimmy: WAS THAT PERSON

  • WEARING A RED HAT WITH FOUR

  • LETTERS ON IT BY ANY CHANCE?

  • >> POSSIBLY, YES.

  • >> Jimmy: WHAT WAS THE FIRST

  • MOVIE YOU EVER SAW, DO YOU

  • REMEMBER?

  • >> YEAH, WHEN I WAS YOUNG, ONE

  • OF THE FIRST MOVIES I EVER SAW

  • WAS A "A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN",

  • "BETELGEUSE" AND "PRIVATE

  • PARTS."

  • >> Jimmy: HOWARD STERN'S MOVIE.

  • >> YEAH.

  • >> Jimmy: HOW OLD WERE YOU?

  • >> 7 OR 8.

  • >> Jimmy: THAT'S THE PERFECT AGE

  • FOR "PRIVATE PARTS."

  • >> AND JUST TRYING TO FIGURE OUT

  • EVERYTHING THAT'S HAPPENING.

  • >> Jimmy: WAS THAT THE WORK OF

  • YOUR DAD?

  • >> MY DAD AND MY UNCLE WERE

  • OBSESSED WITH HOWARD STERN.

  • MY UNCLE HAD THE "PRIVATE PARTS

  • A

  • PARTS"BOOK.

  • AND I WAS LIKE, WHO IS THIS GUY

  • WITH THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING

  • THERE.

  • >> Jimmy: IT WAS IN THE MEDIA.

  • >> YEAH, YEAH.

  • >> Jimmy: SO YOU WERE FASCINATED

  • WITH THIS?

  • >> YEAH, AND MY DAD WAS ALSO

  • OBSESSED WITH RECORDING THE

  • E! SHOW ON AND TAPING IT AND

  • HOARDING THE TAPES.

  • >> Jimmy: AND WHOULD YOU WATCH

  • THAT?

  • >> YEAH.

  • >> Jimmy: SO IT WAS OKAY, YOU

  • GUYS WOULD WATCH IT TOGETHER?

  • >> NO, IT WASN'T OKAY.

  • IT WAS MORTIFYING AS I LOOK BACK

  • NOW.

  • JUST LIKE THE DIFFERENT CONTESTS

  • AND WHATNOT.

  • >> Jimmy: YEAH.

  • >> AND THEN WHEN I WAS IN MY

  • 20S, YEARS LATER, WE FOUND THE

  • TAPES, AND HE'S LIKE, YOU WANT

  • TO

  • TO WATCH THEM?

  • IT STILL DIDN'T GET BETTER.

  • >> Jimmy: DAD WAS NOT

  • UNCOMFORTABLE AT ALL.

  • >> DAD LOVES STERN.

  • >> Jimmy: IN CERTAIN COMPANY,

  • NOT WITH YOUR DAUGHTER.

  • AND AUNT LINDA ALLOWED THIS TO

  • HAPPEN?

  • >> NO.

  • NO.

  • I DON'T THINK AUNT LINDA

  • WOULD --

  • >> Jimmy: SHE'S PRETTY FOCUSSED

  • ON KOU

  • ON CORN RIGHT NOW.

  • >>> TRYING TO STEAL THE KEY TO

  • MY CHEST!

  • >> NOPE.

  • >> SHAKE HER DOWN.

  • >> I'M SORRY, I DID IT.

  • IT WAS MY FAULT.

  • I UM, I JUST, I DON'T KNOW.

  • I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS --

  • >> Jimmy: THAT'S AKWAFINA WITH

  • THE HOUND FROM GAM"GAME OF

  • THRONES," PLAYING ALMOST EXACTLY

  • THE SAME ROLE HE PLAYED IN "GAME

  • OF THRONES."

  • >> I LOVE THAT DUDE, HE'S

  • AWESOME.

  • >> Jimmy: GREAT.

  • THIS MOVIE, YOU'VE GOT DWAYNE

  • JOHNSON, KEVIN HART, JACK BLACK

  • ALL THESE GUYS, DWAYNE JOHNSON

  • WAS HERE THE OTHER NIGHT.

  • >> YEAH.

  • >> Jimmy: HE, FOR CHRISTMAS,

  • BOUGHT HIS MOTHER LAST YEAR A

  • HOUSE, AND THEN FOLLOWED IT BY

  • BUYING HIS FATHER A HOUSE.

  • WILL YOU BE BUYING HOMES FOR

  • YOUR FAMILY THIS HOLIDAY?

  • BECAUSE YOU'RE IN THE MOVIE,

  • TOO.

  • >> YEAH, NO, I WAS IN THAT

  • MOVIE.

  • NO.

  • NO.

  • >> Jimmy: YOU WILL NOT?

  • >> MAYBE A NICE CHAIR.

  • >> Jimmy: MM-HM.

  • >> YOU KNOW?

  • >> Jimmy: HAVE YOU BOUGHT

  • YOURSELF A HOUSE?

  • WHERE DO YOU LIVE NOW?

  • >> I JUST MOVED TO LAC.A.

  • >> Jimmy: YOU DID.

  • DID YOU DO THAT BECAUSE YOU

  • REALLY WANTED TO OR YOU FELT

  • LIKE FOR PROFESSIONAL REASONS IT

  • WOULD BE BETTER?

  • >> YOU KNOW, I DID WANT TO,

  • BECAUSE I LOVE L.A., AND I'LL

  • TELL YOU WHY I LOVE L.A.,

  • GROWING UP IN NEW YORK.

  • MY DREAM WAS ALWAYS TO DRIVE A

  • CAR TO TARGET, GO TO TARGET.

  • YOU LOAD YOUR THINGS IN THERE.

  • YOUR THONGS IN THERE.

  • AND THEN, AND THEN YOU DRIVE

  • HOME, AND THEN YOU GO INTO THE

  • MOUTH OF YOUR HOUSE AND DROP OFF

  • WHAT YOU BOUGHT, INSTEAD OF

  • TAKING FOUR TRAINS HOME WITH

  • LIKE, YOU KNOW, A SMALL HOUSE,

  • YOU KNOW?

  • >> Jimmy: YEAH, YOU KNOW WHAT?

  • I'M TOTALLY WITH YOU ON THAT.

  • I LIKE TO GO TO COSTCO, AND I

  • LIKE TO GET STUFF I DON'T NEED.

  • >> YEAH.

  • >> Jimmy: LIKE 48 BATTERIES.

  • >> YEAH!

  • >> Jimmy: AND I THINK ABOUT THAT

  • ALL THE TIME WHEN I'M IN NEW

  • YORK, BECAUSE I'VE NEVER LIVED

  • IN NEW YORK CITY.

  • I'M LIKE, HOW ARE THESE PEOPLE

  • SHOPPING?

  • >> THEY'RE NOT.

  • THEY ARE, AND THEY'RE BRINGING

  • ON THE TRAIN, YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S

  • LIKE HOLDING A 48-PACK OF TISSUE

  • PAPER?

  • >> Jimmy: I'VE SEEN THAT, AND

  • IT'S NO GOOD.

  • >> IT'S NO GOOD.

  • >> Jimmy: YOU, BEING A HOME

  • OWNER, IS THAT STRESSFUL FOR

  • YOU.

  • >> YOU KNOW, I THOUGHT I WOULD

  • BE A REALLY CHILL HOMEOWNER,

  • LIKE COME ON BY, DUDE.

  • I HAVE A FRIEND THAT'S BEEN

  • LIVING THERE FOR A LONG TIME OR

  • SOMETHING, BUT NO, I'M HORRIBLE.

  • I HAVE A MINI STROKE, A FRIEND

  • CLOGGED MY DOWNSTAIRS TOILET AND

  • I FOUND MYSELF YELLING AT HIM

  • LIKE MY DAD WOULD, YOU KNOW I

  • HAVE TO PAY FOR EVERYTHING THAT

  • HAPPENS IN THIS HOUSE, RIGHT?

  • AND I DO MY LITTLE, WALK OVER TO

  • THINGS, CHECK OUT A CRACK, I

  • ALWAYS HAVE A THING.

  • >> Jimmy: IUH-HUH.

  • MY DAD WAS ALWAYS CHECKING THE

  • WALLS.

  • AND WE ALWAYS MADE FUN OF HIM.

  • YOUR HANDS ARE ON THE WALLS, WHY

  • ARE YOUR HANDS ON THE WALLS.

  • NOW I FIND MYSELF LOOKING AT THE

  • WALLS, AND GOING WHY ARE THESE

  • CHILDREN PUTTING THEIR HANDS ON

  • THE WALLS!

  • >> THIS LITTLE TITANIC SMEAR,

  • YEAH, YEAH.

  • >> Jimmy: ARE YOU THAT ALL

  • BALANCED ALL THE TIME THAT YOU

  • HAVE TO -- SPIDERMAN IS IN THE

  • HOUSE.

  • THEY'RE ALL OVER THE WALLS.

  • >> YES.

  • >> Jimmy: YEAH, YOU HAVE TO

  • PROTECT THE WALLS.

  • >> PROTECT THE WALLS AT ALL

  • COSTS.

  • >> Jimmy: WHAT'S GOING ON FOR

  • CHRISTMAS?

  • YOU HAVE A PLAN?

  • YOU GOING HOME?

  • >> UM, PROBABLY NOT.

  • MY DAD RUINED THANKSGIVING, I'VE

  • HAD ENOUGH.

  • >> Jimmy: YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE

  • A FUN THING, INVITE YOUR FRIENDS

  • OVER TO THE HOUSE, LET THEM CLOG

  • UP THE TOILETS.

  • THE YULETIDE CLOG, A TRADITION

  • FOR YOU.

  • >> THAT WOULD BE VERY FESTIVE,

  • YES.

  • I LOVE T.

  • >> Jimmy: THE MOVIE IS CALLED

  • JUMANJI, THE NEXT LEVEL

A BOOK THAT I

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