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  • What happens when 800 of the world's most elite footballers...

  • and their managers live together under one roof?

  • Players stop being polite...

  • and start getting Re-al.

  • This is...

  • The Champions.

  • And for my next trick,

  • I will make myself reappear as a relevant player!

  • Now that the transfer window is over,

  • I could spend more time pursuing my hobbies.

  • Ya know, like playing football!

  • Hi, this is me, Christian Eriksen!

  • I love to play football for Tottenham Hotspur, I'm so happy!

  • Ah, no. Hello.

  • Watch out Champions League,

  • it's time for Atlanta to rock your world.

  • Uh, it's Atalanta.

  • Ah, s--t.

  • So, today is arrival day,

  • and I'm really excited to be in the Champions League mansion

  • with a club that actually has a chance to make it out of the group stage.

  • Jow!

  • Oh, sorry, I didn't see you...

  • you must have been in my shadow.

  • Uh...what are you talking about?

  • Joao, listen, I know that you feel a lot of pressure;

  • because to be compared to me, this must be very hard.

  • I don't...I really haven't thought about it.

  • Shhhh, baby, baby, shhh, it's OK, it's OK.

  • You just be the best Joao Felix that you can be...

  • because there will never be anyone who can match my skills

  • or my amount of troph-

  • -my good looks.

  • Here...I want you to take this.

  • It is trophy from something I don't remember.

  • Whoa, the Nations League cup. Aw, man. I don't deserve this.

  • I think it should go to our best player.

  • Ah, thank you, but, you know, I already have too many trophies.

  • Oh, no, I meant Bernardo.

  • And here is the kitchen.

  • Whoa.

  • So, I decided to take Luka Jovic under my wing.

  • I even let him into my elite society: 'LUKAS OF REAL MADRID.'

  • OK, so, this is the Pirlo wine dispenser if you want wine.

  • This is, uh, Maradona flour dispenser if you like to bake or something.

  • What does this one do?

  • Oh, that's the Ballon d'Or.

  • It's supposed to make people care about you, but it does not seem to work.

  • Here we are, lads!

  • Looks like we're taking over the Man United room.

  • I think I found Fellaini's old hair.

  • I think I found Alexis Sanchez.

  • Guten tag!

  • Any of you Englanders want some schweinekrusten?

  • Germany definitely changed me.

  • But now, I'm in the Premier League,

  • So, I'm trying to make an effort to understand British culture, innit?

  • So what the heck is up with this Brexit thing?

  • Christian. Stop talking.

  • Listen, Gabriel, I swear-

  • I'm going to find a way to get you more involved. You are just too talented-

  • Ah, Jurgen, my worthy German rival.

  • Pep, my classy Catalan competitor.

  • Champions League trophy...very nice.

  • Premier League trophy...very nice.

  • My doctor says whenever I get a trophy craving

  • I should just put in a commemorative DVD

  • to remind me that it's really about the journey, not the destination so much.

  • It was a good run at Ajax,

  • but I'm very excited to join Juventus because,

  • well, mainly they're paying me a lot of money.

  • Hey, Giorgio! My brother! So excited to be on the squad. What's up?

  • New transfers. Over there.

  • I like it. I see so much new blood.

  • My children, are you willing to serve to sacrifice for the Old Lady?

  • Very good. For she needs the fresh, new blood

  • to stay strong...to stay young. To be...

  • JUVENTUS.

  • Wait...aren't vampires supposed to like...not be in the sun?

  • Vampire? Oh, I'm not a vampire.

  • No, he just drains the life from everyone who plays with him.

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What happens when 800 of the world's most elite footballers...

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