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	UNITED STATES, MICHELLE OBAMA! 00:00:11.343 --> 00:00:18.017 align:start position:0% ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪ ♪ ♪ 00:00:18.050 --> 00:00:20.987 align:start position:0% ♪ LOVE AND HAPPINESS ♪ >> Stephen: THANKS SO MUCH FOR 00:00:21.020 --> 00:00:23.222 align:start position:0% BEING BACK HERE. 00:00:23.255 --> 00:00:25.691 align:start position:0% >> Audience: A.O.C.! 00:00:25.724 --> 00:00:26.659 align:start position:0% A.O.C.! 00:00:26.692 --> 00:00:28.761 align:start position:0% >> Stephen: WE'RE LIVE, WE HAVE TO DO THE SHE.
	>> Stephen: DO YOU THINK THE DIVISION THAT'S IN THE COUNTRY 00:00:31.864 --> 00:00:33.733 align:start position:0% RIGHT NOW IS AN ABERRATION, THIS IS NOT THE NORM? 00:00:33.766 --> 00:00:39.705 align:start position:0% >> I THINK IT IS SO EASY AND LAZY TO LEAD BY FEAR. 00:00:39.738 --> 00:00:42.742 align:start position:0% IT IS MUCH HARDER TO LEAD BY HOPE. 00:00:42.775 --> 00:00:43.810 align:start position:0% ( APPLAUSE ) WITH HOPE. 00:00:43.843 --> 00:00:48.247 size:78% position:39% >> THE CONSTITUTION HAS A SPECIFIC REMEDY, WHICH IS 00:00:48.280 --> 00:00:48.881 align:start position:0% IMPEACHMENT. 00:00:48.914 --> 00:00:49.648 size:84% position:42% >> Stephen: OH, OKAY, OKAY. 00:00:49.682 --> 00:00:52.652 align:start position:0% HOW ABOUT-- HOW ABOUT SUBPOENAED?
	CAN A PRESIDENT BE SUBPOENAED? 00:00:53.652 --> 00:00:55.455 align:start position:0% >> YES, THE SUPREME COURT HAS DECIDE THAT. 00:00:55.488 --> 00:00:56.789 align:start position:0% >> Stephen: OKAY, YOU DON'T HAVE TO YELL. 00:00:56.822 --> 00:00:57.590 align:start position:0% ALL RIGHT. 00:00:57.623 --> 00:00:58.324 align:start position:0% ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE ) 00:00:58.357 --> 00:01:01.294 align:start position:0% ALL RIGHT.
	>> YOU TELLING ME-- I ( BLEEP ). 00:01:05.698 --> 00:01:08.434 align:start position:0% >> ROBERT. 00:01:08.467 --> 00:01:13.806 align:start position:0% >> Stephen: THAT ROBERT IS INSTANTLY LEGENDARY. 00:01:13.839 --> 00:01:14.140 align:start position:0% "ROBERT." 00:01:14.173 --> 00:01:15.307 align:start position:0% >> I KNOW. 00:01:15.341 --> 00:01:19.779 align:start position:0% >> Stephen: EVERYBODY WHO FREAKS OUT AT ANYBODY, FROM NOW 00:01:19.812 --> 00:01:21.380 align:start position:0% ON OUT-- ( APPLAUSE )
	IF ANYBODY-- IF ANYBODY YELLS AT ME, IF ANYBODY YELLS AT ME FOR 00:01:24.884 --> 00:01:27.386 align:start position:0% THE NEXT YEAR, I'M JUST GOING TO GO, "ROBERT." 00:01:27.419 --> 00:01:30.490 align:start position:0% >> WE'VE NEVER FAILED TO ADDRESS THIS ISSUE.
	AND WE WILL ADDRESS IT AGAIN. 00:01:32.224 --> 00:01:35.128 align:start position:0% I DON'T KNOW WHY HE'S ALL BENT OUT OF SHAPE. 00:01:35.161 --> 00:01:38.297 align:start position:0% >> Stephen: WELL, SENATOR, I FOR WITHIN DON'T THINK-- 00:01:38.330 --> 00:01:40.066 align:start position:0% >> WHAT DID HE SAY? 00:01:40.099 --> 00:01:49.509 align:start position:0% ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) I KNOW THAT YOUR SPECIES ISN'T 00:01:49.542 --> 00:01:52.145 size:78% position:39% KNOWN FOR MOVING QUICKLY. 00:01:52.178 --> 00:01:56.315 align:start position:0% ( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: WOULD THAT BE-- 00:01:56.348 --> 00:02:01.187 align:start position:0% WOULD THAT BE APE TURTLE REFERENCE, JON? 00:02:01.220 --> 00:02:03.623 align:start position:0% >> TOMORROW, AS SOON AS POSSIBLE, AND DON'T MAKE THEM 00:02:03.656 --> 00:02:04.957 align:start position:0% BEG FOR IT. 00:02:04.990 --> 00:02:09.896 align:start position:0% YOU COULD PASS THIS THING AS A STANDALONE BILL TOMORROW. 00:02:09.929 --> 00:02:10.863 align:start position:0% MEET WITH THEM. 00:02:10.896 --> 00:02:12.398 align:start position:0% I BEG OF YOU. 00:02:12.431 --> 00:02:14.500 size:75% position:38% MEET WITH THEM TOMORROW. 00:02:14.533 --> 00:02:15.634 align:start position:0% ( APPLAUSE ). 00:02:15.668 --> 00:02:20.806 size:88% position:44% >> Stephen: DO YOU FEEL LIKE HE IS NOW, STILL, TWO YEARS 00:02:20.839 --> 00:02:24.977 align:start position:0% N"YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT GUY FOR THIS JOB AT THIS TIME"? 00:02:25.010 --> 00:02:25.978 align:start position:0% >> WHO THE PRESIDENT? 00:02:26.011 --> 00:02:26.946 align:start position:0% >> Stephen: YEAH. 00:02:26.979 --> 00:02:28.714 align:start position:0% >> WELL, I MEAN -- >> Stephen: DO YOU REGRET AT
	ALL-- DO YOU REGRET AT ALL HELPING THIS MAN GET ELECTED? 00:02:33.118 --> 00:02:36.222 align:start position:0% AND I'LL JOIN YOU-- I'LL JOIN YOU ON THIS ONE. 00:02:36.255 --> 00:02:40.426 align:start position:0% ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: FORMER STAFFERS OF 00:02:40.459 --> 00:02:43.729 align:start position:0% YOURS HAVE LAUNCHED "ORGANIZING FOR BERNIE" THIS WEEK. 00:02:43.762 --> 00:02:46.232 align:start position:0% I KNOW YOU'RE NOT GOING TO ANSWER THE QUESTION, SO I'M NOT 00:02:46.265 --> 00:02:49.135 align:start position:0% GOING TO ASK YOU IF YOU'RE RUNNING IN 2020, SO DON'T MAKE 00:02:49.168 --> 00:02:50.069 align:start position:0% ME ASK IT. 00:02:50.102 --> 00:02:50.770 align:start position:0% JUST TELL ME. 00:02:50.803 --> 00:02:52.605 size:75% position:38% ARE YOU RUNNING IN 2020?
	OR ARE THEY WASTING THEIR TIME?
	SHOULD WE TELL RIM THEM RIGHT NOW THEY'RE WASTING THEIR TIME
	TO ORGANIZE FOR JEW WHY I THINK YOU WOULD ASK ME THAT QUESTION. 00:03:04.583 --> 00:03:06.185 align:start position:0% >> Stephen: ARE YOU GOING TO RUN FOR PRESIDENT? 00:03:06.218 --> 00:03:11.390 align:start position:0% ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> I MIGHT. 00:03:11.423 --> 00:03:14.427 align:start position:0% >> Stephen: YOU MIGHT. 00:03:14.460 --> 00:03:15.962 align:start position:0% YOU MIGHT! 00:03:15.995 --> 00:03:17.496 size:84% position:42% WHY CAN'T YOU JUST TELL US? 00:03:17.529 --> 00:03:19.665 align:start position:0% ISN'T LEADERSHIP ABOUT DECISIVENESS? 00:03:19.698 --> 00:03:20.866 align:start position:0% >> IT IS.
	>> Stephen: RIGHT NOW, YOU'VE GOT AN OPPORTUNITY TO PROVE TO 00:03:22.101 --> 00:03:26.205 align:start position:0% THE AMERICAN PEOPLE THAT YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO SIT IN THE 00:03:26.238 --> 00:03:26.739 align:start position:0% OVAL OFFICE! 00:03:26.772 --> 00:03:28.140 align:start position:0% MAKE THE TOUGH CALLS! 00:03:28.173 --> 00:03:30.576 align:start position:0% >> I'LL SPEAK ON HIS BEHALF HERE.
	HE'S GOING TO RUN FOR PRESIDENT. 00:03:31.677 --> 00:03:32.778 align:start position:0% HOW ABOUT THAT? 00:03:32.812 --> 00:03:36.616 size:78% position:39% ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: AND THE MONEY 00:03:36.649 --> 00:03:39.252 align:start position:0% WOULD COME FROM A TAX ON THE SUPER WEALTHY? 00:03:39.285 --> 00:03:40.219 align:start position:0% >> YEAH! 00:03:40.252 --> 00:03:42.255 align:start position:0% >> Stephen: WHAT NUMBER-- >> YEAH!
	>> Stephen: I'M ALL FOR THAT. 00:03:43.389 --> 00:03:43.889 align:start position:0% I'M ALL FOR THAT. 00:03:43.922 --> 00:03:45.157 align:start position:0% >> GOOD.
	>> Stephen: I'M JUST CURIOUS WHAT NUMBER SUPER WELLIE STARTS 00:03:51.063 --> 00:03:52.298 align:start position:0% AT.
	COULD YOU WRITE ON THIS PIECE OF PAPER AND I'LL LET YOU KNOW HOW 00:03:53.832 --> 00:03:57.570 align:start position:0% MUCH I SUPPORT-- >> 123123 PLUS 1. 00:03:57.603 --> 00:03:59.905 align:start position:0% THAT'S WEALTH. 00:03:59.938 --> 00:04:01.207 align:start position:0% IT'S $50 MILLION. 00:04:01.240 --> 00:04:04.610 size:78% position:39% >> Stephen: OKAY, I'M ON BOARD, I'M ON BOARD THEN. 00:04:04.643 --> 00:04:05.611 align:start position:0% I'M ON BOARD. 00:04:05.644 --> 00:04:09.382 align:start position:0% ( APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: TED CRUZ HAS HELD 00:04:09.415 --> 00:04:11.917 align:start position:0% ON TO HIS SENATE SEAT. 00:04:11.950 --> 00:04:14.520 align:start position:0% IN TEXAS. 00:04:14.553 --> 00:04:18.758 align:start position:0% HOLD ON ONE SECOND. 00:04:18.791 --> 00:04:22.995 align:start position:0% ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ONCE AGAIN, TED CRUZ DEFEATS 00:04:23.028 --> 00:04:24.163 align:start position:0% BETO O'ROURKE. 00:04:24.196 --> 00:04:28.701 align:start position:0% ALTHOUGH, ALTHOUGH, BY NOT BEING TED CRUZ, BETO IS STILL A 00:04:28.734 --> 00:04:29.835 align:start position:0% WINNER. 00:04:29.869 --> 00:04:32.438 align:start position:0% ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> JUST REMEMBER, IT WASN'T THE 00:04:32.471 --> 00:04:33.639 align:start position:0% REPUBLICANS.
	IT WAS THE DEMOCRATS THAT TOOK YOU INTO THE VET TO GET FIXED. 00:04:36.475 --> 00:04:38.878 align:start position:0% AND-- AND THERE IS FREEDOM ON THE OTHER SIDE. 00:04:38.911 --> 00:04:44.650 align:start position:0% >> I SUPPORT-- HEY, I SUPPORT SPAYING AND NEUTERING, JUST LIKE 00:04:44.683 --> 00:04:46.352 align:start position:0% TRUMP DID TO YOU! 00:04:46.385 --> 00:04:47.153 align:start position:0% I KID! 00:04:47.186 --> 00:04:49.856 align:start position:0% line:76% >> COMING UP, STEPHEN GOES OUSIDE

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The News Comes To Stephen Colbert: Best Of Season Four

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林宜悉 published on October 22, 2019

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The News Comes To Stephen Colbert: Best Of Season Four

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