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  • >> Guillermo: NO.

  • [ LAUGHTER ]

  • >> Jimmy: YOU KNOW, OF ALL THE

  • MANY RELATIONSHIPS WE AS HUMANS

  • HAVE, MOTHER IS PROBABLY THE

  • MOST COMPLICATED.

  • I MEAN, WE COME OUT OF THEM.

  • THAT'S WEIRD, RIGHT?

  • AND SO TO HONOR THE FASCINATING

  • WOMEN WHO BAKED US, WE INVITED

  • FAMOUS PEOPLE TO READ TEXT

  • MESSAGES FROM THEIR MOTHERS.

  • THESE ARE REAL TEXTS FROM REAL

  • MOTHERS, FROM REAL PEOPLE YOU

  • KNOW AND LOVE.

  • ENJOY.

  • >> MY DEAR ANNIE.

  • I HOPE THIS DOESN'T WAKE YOU.

  • I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW HOW

  • PROUD YOUR FATHER AND I ARE OF

  • YOU.

  • AS YOU KNOW KNOW, WE TRULY

  • BELIEVE YOU ARE THE GREATEST

  • ACTRESS OF YOUR GENERATION.

  • WE DO SOMEDAY HOPE YOU

  • TRANSITION INTO DRAMATIC WORK.

  • I ALSO WOKE UP BECAUSE I'M

  • WORRIED YOU'RE NOT WEARING

  • ENOUGH SUNSCREEN AND TAKING THE

  • B-12 I GOT YOU FROM A COSTCO.

  • I HOPE THIS DOESN'T WAKE YOU.

  • PLEASE GIVE ALLISON JANNEY OUR

  • LOVE AND CONGRATULATIONS.

  • NO ONE DESERVES THE OSCAR MORE

  • THAN HER.

  • 3:34 A.M.

  • >> I SIMPLY CAN'T BELIEVE TRUMP

  • WENT THROUGH ALL THIS TO KEEP

  • STORMY DANIELS QUIET.

  • HE MUST HAVE A VERY SMALL

  • PEANUT.

  • PEANUTS.

  • PENIS.

  • SORRY.

  • I HATE THIS PHONE.

  • >> SO EVERY YEAR I'LL SEND MY

  • MOM A CHRISTMAS ORNAMENT TO PUT

  • ON HER CHRISTMAS TREE, AND THIS

  • MOST RECENT ONE SHE GOT, IT TOOK

  • A PICTURE OF IT ON THE TREE AND

  • THIS IS WHAT SHE WROTE.

  • THANK YOU, JACK.

  • HOPE YOU LIVE LONG ENOUGH TO SEE

  • IT IN PERSON.

  • >> SIMON HELLBERG.

  • HOLY [ BLEEP ].

  • BRILLIANT WORK IN FLORENCE

  • FOSTER JENKINS.

  • IS IT OKAY FOR A GRANDMA TO

  • LUST?

  • SURE.

  • JUST YOU TRULY DO NOT NEED TO

  • TEXT ME ABOUT IT.

  • >> SO KEENAN DAEQUAN RAY

  • [ BLEEP ] JACKSON.

  • I WANT THIS 100K CAR FOR MY

  • 50th.

  • I'M YOUR MOM.

  • >> KEENAN DAEQUAN RAY MOTHER

  • [ BLEEP ] JACKSON.

  • I WANT THAT CAR.

  • >> MAN, YOU KEEP [ BLEEP ] UP

  • BECAUSE LIKE YOU SAYING TOO

  • MUCH.

  • >> OH, OKAY.

  • >> HEY, KRISTEN.

  • I KNOW THAT YOU KNOW JIMMY

  • KIMMEL.

  • AND HE'S DOING THE OSCARS.

  • SO TELL HIM TO GIVE YOU ALL THE

  • WINNERS SO YOU CAN GIVE ME THE

  • WINNERS AND I CAN WIN AT MY

  • OSCAR PARTY.

  • >> HEY, SON.

  • OUR NEW FRIENDS ARE LOVING

  • ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT.

  • WE STILL DON'T GET IT.

  • HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY.

  • >> OH.

  • DEAR PATTON -- WHO AM I KIDDING?

  • MY MOM DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO TEXT.

  • SHE ONLY CALLS ME ON A LANDLINE.

  • I DON'T EVEN HAVE VOICE

  • MESSAGES.

  • >> THIS IS JUST A SERIES OF

  • EMOJIS.

  • IT IS A SUN, A DOG, A FISH, A

  • CRAB, A BOAR, A CRAB, I THINK A

  • CAT, AND THEN THIS NUMBER OF

  • DUCKS.

  • AND A BEE AT THE END AND DUCKS.

  • AND THEN ONE ADDITIONAL ONE WITH

  • JUST ALL DUCKS.

  • >> MY MOTHER TEXTED ME LAST

  • WEEK.

  • BABY, YOU KNOW WHAT I WANT FOR

  • MOTHER'S DAY?

  • I SAY, WHAT, MA?

  • SHE SAID, I WANT A ROOM IN

  • VEGAS.

  • I WAS LIKE, OKAY, I'LL TAKE CARE

  • OF IT.

  • THREE DAYS LATER I JUST WAKE UP

  • TO A TEXT THAT SAYS, GET HOTEL.

  • WORKING ON IT, MAMA.

  • NEXT DAY, TELL ME WHERE IT IS.

  • MAMA, I'M WAITING ON APPROVAL.

  • ALL RIGHT?

  • SO IF ANYBODY WANTS TO GO TO

  • VEGAS AND SEE MY MOTHER, SHE'S

  • STAYING AT ROOM 1337 AT THE

  • MANDALAY BAY HOTEL.

  • SHE'LL BE THERE SATURDAY NIGHT.

  • LOVE YOU, MAMA.

  • >> WELL, LISTEN, YOU KNOW WHAT?

  • EVERYONE'S MOM IS CRAZY.

>> Guillermo: NO.

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