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  • Ah, Goo Lagoon.

  • Where the sun is hot and the sun bathers are oh so cool.

  • What a beautiful day.

  • You said it, pal.

  • Can you believe that sun?

  • I could look at it all day.

  • Uh, Patrick?

  • What?

  • Nothing.

  • This show was filmed in front of a live studio audience.

  • So, how's that tan coming?

  • I don't know, let me check.

  • Looking good!

  • How's yours?

  • Just a minute.

  • Ah!

  • I could have sworn I was laying on my back.

  • Larry! Larry! Larry!

  • Hey, it's Larry the lifeguard.

  • Nobody really likes those guys.

  • Being a lifeguard is so dumb.

  • All they do is blow, blow, blow on their stupid whistles.

  • Rub, rub, rub that white stuff on their noses.

  • And show off their gross misshapen bodies!

  • Dude, put that thing away.

  • They're like, children here.

  • I'm going to the snack bar.

  • Hey!

  • I didn't know that you were a lifeguard.

  • Lifeguard?

  • The nose.

  • White stuff.

  • You think I'm a lifeguard?

  • Sure, there's no hiding the lifeguard look, SpongeBob, and you've got it!

  • You really think so?

  • Babes and the big chair are great.

  • But the best part is knowing you're the only thing that stands between these good people...

  • Go, go, go, go, go!

  • And a watery grave.

  • And that's what it's all about.

  • Their lives are in your hands now.

  • 'Cause I got a date with a tanning booth.

  • See ya!

  • But I... can't swim.

  • Free ice cream!

  • Yay!

  • Ah-ha!

  • Now I gotcha!

  • Now y'all have to wait one hour before you go swimming.

  • But just so you're not tempted...

  • Ice cream!

  • Did somebody say ice cream?

  • Where is it?

  • Is it here?

  • Ice cream, yay!

  • Cramp!

  • Ah, ah!

  • Holy cow, somebody's drowning!

  • Oh no, that is not possible.

  • The lagoon is closed.

  • Dude, get your butt in the water.

  • If there was anyone in there, we'd hear them.

  • Help!

  • I can't swim!

  • Somebody would be screaming that they're drowning.

  • I'm drowning!

  • They would have to had crossed the line.

  • I'm drowning 'cause I crossed the line!

  • OK, I'll take a look.

  • But just to prove to you that--

  • Patrick isn't drowning!

  • Can't swim!

  • Butt hurts!

  • Ice cream!

  • Hold on, Patrick!

  • I'm coming!

  • Help!

  • Patrick can't drown if there isn't any water.

  • Help, I'm drowning, I got a butt cramp, I want ice cream and now it's dark!

  • Help!

  • OK Patrick, here I come.

  • Calm-- Calm down, Pat.

  • Here I am.

  • Pat, Pat, no! Pat, Pat!

  • Pat, stop, stop!

  • Stop!

  • Oh, sorry.

  • Help! Help! Help! Save me!

  • Can't swim!

  • Patrick, don't!

  • Help!

  • Help!

  • Help us!

  • We're drowning!

  • Goodbye ice cream!

  • Help!

  • Can't swim!

  • Oh, no!

  • SpongeBob?

  • Yes, Larry?

  • You're not a lifeguard, are you?

  • No, Larry.

  • Let's go, guys!

  • Very good!

  • You fellas are learning fast!

  • Ow, butt cramps!

  • And I still don't have my ice cream.

Ah, Goo Lagoon.

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