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July 7th is "Minor Heat", which means it'll only get hotter from here.
I hope everyone is enjoying sweating.
I'm at the mic but stuck in a sweltering room at 86 degrees.
With closed windows and door and no air conditioning.
Lately my life sucks: my throat hurts, I injured my hand and my earphones broke.
Fortunately some foreigners said they'll send me some free ones!
So I'm going to shamelessly talk about their products here.
They're sending me these "11 Deco" earphones, from a British brand called Meze.
Very high-end, gorgeous and elegant, great for showing off.
They look so nice that I don't want to put them in my ears!
The selling point is the luxurious Ebony, with unique designs.
Take them apart, even the inside looks great!
As you all know, the best feature about wooden earphones is...
Termites!
Wait no, I meant the natural design style and warm sound.
You can find more products on the Meze official website.
There's a Taiwanese distributor on PChome too.
Most of the products are over/on-ear.
But they also have some in-ear models.
So you can enjoy music even when your head looks like this.
ANYWAY
Today we'll be talking about
Black Waterchestn...I mean Maleficent.
Maleficient is a movie released by Disney in May 2014
Based on "Sleeping Beauty" from Grimm's Fairy Tales
I'm sure everyone knows about it so I'll make it quick.
Basically "Sleeping Beauty" is about a woman having a fit
Because she is not the King's favorite
And decided to cast a deep sleep spell on a baby but it will not manifest for 16 years
This takes too long and I'll never play co-op with her in LoL
If you read the original, there are a lot of plot holes
And many unreasonable things, that's why they're fairy tales
But it is a popular tale and meaningful, so people are always redoing it
Like the Disney cartoon "Sleeping Beauty" in 1959
The designs clearly reflect pop culture from the 50s
By today's standards of course it's not that impressive
The only thing people remember is the funky looking witch
Many years passed and I guess Disney was inspired by the water chestnut head
They decided to write a Sleeping Beauty story from the perspective of the evil witch
Thus we have Maleficent
Because Frozen was a movie based on a fairy tale and was such a huge hit
I knew I would want to go see this one too
But the foreign reviews weren't very good
and had me worried
So I went in expecting very little
And...let's just say it was "interesting"
Obviously there are many positive things about Maleficent
Like Angelina Jolie's personal charm
Or the great CG in the movie
The perspective changed from the princess to the Witch, and it's Disney!
My pet can probably tell you that it's about how a person went from good to bad to good again
On one hand, the message was great, actors were great, the script was great
But on the other, it feels like there's a lot of room for improvement
Let's not sugarcoat it
In my humble opinion here are some things they could have done better¡K
First, the narration took away too much spotlight
Narration is a cop out for getting the audience up to speed with the plot
When they don't feel like acting out the scene, don't have budget or time, this is a shortcut
You can see this in many mangas that were cut short, authors love this play
Narration also helps the passage of time, especially when it's a LONG time
For example, "the princess grew up after X years and turned into a lovely woman that every man wants"
A lot of information can be packed into a single line without a single actor doing anything
That's why it's so convenient
In the meantime, it also pulls the audience "out" of the movie
It's kind of difficult to put yourself in the world created by the movie
When a voice that doesn't belong started talking about the plot like some distant memory
Maleficent had too many of these, it felt like a children's book with words and not a movie
The writer probably thought everyone was an idiot
So every scene had additional explanations, such as:
"They became friends. And then one day this friendship turned into something more"
"As the Kingdom of Humans grew more powerful, he also grew more ambitious"
"They talked about many things from their pasts, and then she forgave him"
"The King made sure every spinning wheel was destroyed. DESTROY ALL THE WHEELS"
"Aurora grows more beautiful and elegant each day"
DUH! I'm not blind and I can see all this on the screen
Do you think I might misunderstand some of the plot?
Every time I hear the narration I felt like the story had just started
And even after an hour it was still sneaking into the movie
I really wanted to choke the narrator and ask her to STFU and just get on with acting instead
Secondly, the story was not very smooth
The movie started when Maleficent was a girl, so there was a lot to cover
When she finally became old, er, I meant adult
The movie had to switch to the princess and get her to 16
There were only 90 minutes to portray 2 full generations
It's more rushed than trying to catch the last train of the day
Coupled with the narration problem, the movie didn't feel very refined
To fix that and contribute to the climax, they added some mushy parts
In other words, to let Maleficent appeal kawaii
I didn't even need to watch Frozen to guess the plot twist at the end
Throughout the movie my mind was screaming this repeatedly:
My Prince Charming is a hero
One day she will come find me with black chestnuts on her head
I predicted the beginning, but didn't expect the ending
PSYCH
Looking back I couldn't even tell where was the plot twist and where was the climax
This "movie" was basically a collection of clips with really poor transitions in between
The plot is more like a checklist than a story
Maleficent's past? Check
The spell? Check
Maleficent raising a child? Check
Maleficent having an epiphany? Check
Maleficent saving the princess? Check
Did we miss anything? Right,
Maleficent taking off her clothes? CHECK!
Then just connect everything and use narration where we can't connect
We need no transition, people will be too busy watching Angelina Jolie anyway
The next thing that I have a problem with is the supporting characters
Angelina Jolie was great and she was the focus of the whole movie
But some of the supporting characters are really whack
And make you wonder what they were thinking when creating these
Like the 3 Fairies with questionable intelligence who were sucking up to Maleficent
But went to the King's banquet and blessed his daughter
Took her home even though they've never raised children before
Whose side are you on? What the hell?
It seems like there were no qualified nannies in this Kingdom
So she had to be cared for by these 3 fools that fed her raw carrots
But the King's decision to entrust them with his daughter...well I worry about his intelligence too
So under the care of these 3 fools she somehow managed to grow into a fine young woman
My speculation is that she probably grew up on junk faerie food
She's definitely not as senile as her dad
And she doesn't act like an idiot
But when the narration was force-feeding us about her loveliness I felt like she was more on the "mentally challenged" side
Maybe it's because her stepmom has been casting Daze spells even before she turned 16
and one of the side effects had an impact on the brain that gave her Alzheimer's
One minute she wants to be BFF with her faerie godmother
Next minute she's flirting with some guy asking for directions
Then she became an angry teenager and took off look for her father
Well this is what happens when you don't think before you act, good game Aurora
So now it's back to the guy who majored in Getting Lost
She's already back in the castle and bored out of her mind, why are you still in the woods?!
The rest is history as we know it
He spent a good amount of time being carried around like a balloon
Show up, do nothing, and gets the princess anyway!
Before his ejection he left us with something profound
Disney should probably copyright it and put it on every poster henceforth
"I only met her once!"
On the other hand we have Diaval, who was actually relatively smart
He was loyal, he was useful, and he seemed nice
Halfway through the movie I thought he was going to be the love interest
But what a shame¡K
Anyway, I actually still really like the movie despite all the complaints
I'm not surprised it did well in the box office even though it wasn't very well done
First, it's an Angelina Jolie movie and that carries enough weight on its own
Second, it's still a remake of a classic
I don't really remember anything from the 1959 version
But according to foreign fans, it recreated some of the classic scenes with CG
And older moviegoers were moved to tears because it brought back memories
But I think the biggest asset of Maleficent is the "human touch"
It's not a "WOW" movie, and it's not an over-the-top movie
Even a 10-year-old could tell most of the plot holes
But in some scenes you could really feel the sincere emotions
Sometimes naive and cute, sometimes ruthless and cruel
You could really tell the atmosphere of the scene without any words
Some movies have spectacular lighting, a great plot, nice cars and hot women
But you couldn't tell what the movie was really about
Maleficent is exactly the opposite
There are a lot of shortcomings but none of them really matter too much
Some characters were fully developed and the message was good, and made it beautiful
On the surface, the movie was not very well polished and definitely not a blockbuster for everyone
But it has its special moments, both good and bad, and the rewatch value is very high
So long as you don't mind that everyone other than Jolie and Diaval are idiots and some even have negative IQ, then it's all good
Because LOVE SAVES ALL.
All of the above is just Shintaro's personal opinion. Thank you for watching!
Original Script by Shintaro ([email protected])
Translated by Bernard Shih ([email protected])
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Maleficent Movie Review

368 Folder Collection
Weng Alice published on May 29, 2019
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