"My Drunk Story" tweets from you guys, here we go.

This first one is from @ellenmlauri. She says, "One night I got so drunk at the bar that I stole a girl's birthday crown off her head,

went to another bar, and made everyone there buy me birthday drinks."

[ Laughter ]

It's my special day.

My birthday.

This one's from @ahskidmore. He says, "One morning my roommate found me passed out on the kitchen floor.

The microwave door was open, and I was clutching three raw hot dogs in my hand."

[ Laughter ]

-You almost got there, dude. -Yeah almost, man.

-He almost made it. -Yeah.

That's the old college try.

[ Laughs ] This one's from @Jordan White 4. She says, "My drunk friends and I ordered an Uber once and the driver texted me,

'I'm here for you.' I texted back, 'OMG that's so sweet.'"

[ Laughter ]

You're my best friend.

I am my best friend.

This one's from @buntybaggins.

Oh. [ Laughter ]

She says, "Once I was so drunk I thought it'd be a brilliant idea to slide across the dance floor on my knees.

The floor was rubber, so I came to an immediate stop, skinned my knees, and split my dress."

There you go! [ Laughter ]

-The trifecta. -Bunty!

-How embarrassing was that? -Hee-haw

[Grunts]

-Wow. -Hold it, Bunty.

This one's from @FoggyDew1310.

He says, "I once came home at 4 a.m. and showed my ID to my dad at the front door of the house

thinking it was another bar."

[ Laughter ]

[ Laughs ] He was up waiting for him.

He didn't even get in that.

He didn't even get into his own house.

This one's from @maddie_shea524. She says, "This was my search history after a night at the bar."

It says max pizza sticks and how to undrunk yourself.

[ Laughter ]

That's fantastic.

Pizza sticks? Never heard of that.

This one's from @GreenApple2. He says, "My friend once let me drunkenly crash on his couch. I woke up on the floor

of his living room with his 8-year-old son lining up action figures around my body saying. 'Don't wake the giant!'"

[ Laughter ]

Hey, man.

This one is from, uh, @debAURAhhh. She says, "I once drunkenly turned myself in to the lost and found at a baseball game after I went

to the restroom during the 7th inning stretch and couldn't remember where my seat was."

[ Laughter ]

Hi, I-I'm missing. I think I'm missing.

Uh, this one is from @thePolishista or thepolishista?

Polishista, like maybe she's into nail polish?

Polishing? Like Pledge furniture polish?

Oh, yeah, man.

Yeah thepolishista. Or Polish.

She loves Poland.

[ Light laughter ] Uh, she says, "I once got so drunk that I began crying when I realized

my parakeet had to live his life without hands." [ Laughter ]

What?! That's too much.

You've had too much.

You've had too much to drink, I'm sorry.

This one's from @mc 125. She says, "My friend got so drunk one night he went to the tattoo shop

across the street and got the name 'Brad' tattooed under his arm so he'd have a Brad Pitt tattoo." [ Laughter ]

And that's it. That's it.

♪♪♪♪

-Wow. -Brad Pitt.

Got a Brad Pitt tattoo.

-Absolutley I think. -No.

Fantastic.

This last one's from @boss hogg57. He says, "I went out with $20. I woke up with $250, a lighter, two phones, and the keys to someone else's car."

[ Laughter ]

That's a win right there.

And there you have it, those are tonight's show hashtags.

To check out more of our favorites go to

tonightshow.com/hashtags.