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  • Oh, you're a beautiful audience.

  • It's a beautiful day in June.

  • Obviously, I don't have to tell you it's June.

  • Why am I saying it's June?

  • You're like, "I know it's June, Ellen."

  • You know, I always look good when I come out here

  • because I know you're going to look good.

  • And people ask me often,

  • "What's the secret to looking good, Ellen?"

  • And they're usually on the side of me.

  • And I say to them, I tell them it's very simple.

  • "I get sleep.

  • I eat healthy.

  • And 20 years ago, I made a deal with witch. "

  • [LAUGHTER]

  • I know every year, there are new beauty trends out there.

  • I thought I would show you some interesting ones that I found.

  • I take care of my teeth.

  • I think it's very important.

  • I brush my teeth several times a day.

  • I floss-- very important to floss everybody-- floss.

  • Yeah.

  • Flossing.

  • [APPLAUSE]

  • Woohoo, flossing.

  • [APPLAUSE]

  • But here's the thing.

  • This is a new toothpaste I found.

  • I would not use this.

  • This is charcoal toothpaste.

  • It's the same as regular toothpaste.

  • But you put it on your toothbrush,

  • and then you look like this when you're brushing your teeth.

  • It looks like you just ate a sleeve of Oreos.

  • Then after you're done, your teeth

  • are supposed to look much whiter.

  • Well, of course, they're going to look whiter.

  • I mean, after that, you're like, " look at my teeth,

  • they're white. "

  • The next thing is something I saw on Instagram.

  • It's for your eyebrows.

  • Eyebrows are important.

  • They're like a mustache for your forehead.

  • And this is something called "fishtail eyebrows".

  • Has anyone seen that before?

  • Yeah.

  • It's a thing.

  • Actually I think I can explain it.

  • You know the movie, The Shape of Water,

  • where the lady has sex with a fish.

  • This is the kid.

  • This is--

  • Finally, there's a massage treatment that's

  • very popular in Indonesia.

  • It's called "snake massage".

  • It's not what it sounds like.

  • Look.

  • I'm kidding.

  • It is.

  • It's exactly what it sounds like.

  • I know it looks scary, but they don't use dangerous snakes.

  • I'm kidding again.

  • They use 6-foot pythons.

  • And I don't know how someone comes up with that idea,

  • to say let's try a snake massage or how someone chooses that.

  • You're looking at, and you check into the hotel.

  • " I need a massage--

  • Swedish, shiatsu, hot stone, deep tissue, snake massage.

  • Yes, I'd like a 90-minute snake massage, please."

  • I'm reading off of the--

  • It's not written on my hand.

  • I should have held it like that.

  • That's what I should have done.

  • Apparently with a snake massage, they

  • offer a happy ending, which I think that's where you live.

  • I think, that happy ending is you just live.

  • They say it's very relaxing, so let's relax.

  • I know people are freaked out by snakes,

  • so I'm going to warn you.

  • It's only for a few seconds, but this is

  • the snake massage they offer.

  • [MUSIC PLAYING]

  • How is that relaxing?

  • And she's doing nothing.

  • She's just standing there.

  • She came up with it.

  • She's like, "I'm tired of working so hard.

  • I'm just going to dump snakes on somebody's back."

Oh, you're a beautiful audience.

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