Basic US 5910 Folder Collection
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We're at the Fèlsina Winery in Chianti, and this is Chiara.
Yes, correct.
This is my friend, Jordan.
Mm-hmm. Welcome.
And for many years, he has talked about one of his favorite wines, which comes from this vineyard.
And so now I've brought you here.
This is a magic moment for you, so maybe a thank you.
Yeah, thank you.
What a dick.
The first thing that...
Well no, I always think the way...
(glass scratching table)
- So and our expert can.. - What was that?
Hold it, hold it.
Don't hold it, that's annoying.
(glass scratching table)
- That's annoying. Lift it. - It's not annoying me.
Does it smell good or not?
(glass scratching table)
Excuse me.
(chuckles) I will cut your goddamn hand off if you do that again.
That is annoying. Stop it.
First test is the color.
- The color. - So you can see the color.
You wanna be able to see your finger through it.
Yes. Yes.
Jordan, hold yours up and see if you can see my finger through your wine.
Can you see it?
You can see that. Okay?
It's important.
That's important.
This is another Sangiovese.
- Cento per cento? - Cento per cento. (speaking Italian)
Cento per cento. (glass scratching table)
Can you do me a favor?
Stop dragging it across the stone.
It really does bother me.
- I just wanna explain something... - And I've told you like eight times.
Right, I understand.
This is fantastic.
See, you drank the whole thing.
You were supposed to spill some of it out.
Why?
Well, you see, if you become intoxicated, you won't be able to adequately drink this wine.
- And so you just drank mine. - He's drinking your wine!
Yeah.
Watch this, it's a magic trick I learned in alcoholism school.
Voilà. (法文)
What would you eat with this wine?
- Cinghiale, cinghiale (Italian) is a... - What's that?
- Cinghiale is a wild boar... - Oh, a wild boar. - It is one of the primary meats of Tuscany.
Exactly.
The meat is often greasy, and it coats your tongue.
Drinking this after cleans your tongue.
It's your favorite wine.
Mm-hmm.
And it does seem to pair well with bore.
So and then you smell it.
And you immediately have these notes of fruit, cherry and black fruit.
I don't concentrate on the fruit.
I concentrate on the earth, and I smell a forest.
I mean, I feel like I'm lost in the woods right now.
Yeah, it's damp like when you're walking in the woods and maybe it rains.
- Wet soil. - It's damp.
You mean wet soil?
Well, not even the soil, but like if there's like moss on a branch and you step on it.
Can I say something?
- (speaking Italian) - Can I say...
You're not even drunk yet, idiot.
What are you talking, you're an idiot!
Good one, good one, Jordan.
You think if you stand and you twirl your glass without putting it on the table you're supposed to get.
You're a fool.
Is it Chiara?
Right.
You're a fool!
We've had nothing to drink yet!
We've had nothing to drink and we're behaving this way.
(glass scratching table)
Okay, I want your help.
- Please stop that. Please stop it. - Yes.
- I will smash your face to powder. - Yes, yes.
The truffle dogs will come in and they will feast on your powdered puss.
Of all the wine tastings you've done, is this the stupidest one?
Not stupid, but different.
Very different.
Better.
She didn't say better.
I said better.
I know, you've said a lot of stuff.
You're lost in the woods.
You're roamin' around with a moss stick up your ass.
We don't know what your problem is.
And some aged wine. (wine swishing)
I have not had mine...
Oh see, now that's a...
That is just a fantastic wine.
If I was one of these three wines, I would be the Fontalloro because I am subtle, you know?
So you have to look deep.
- Yeah. - You know?
You are a right up front in your face initially, and then that's it.
- And then there's no more, so you get it all at once. - You know what? We finally agree.
You are like the Fontalloro in that I would like to push you into a barrel and seal it.
And then wait 20 years, open it up and enjoy what's left of you.
- Cin cin! (Italian) - Salute! (Italian)
Salute! (Italian)
Now you see, you should never hold a wine glass like that.
That's a (speaks Italian) That is inelegant.
You're getting your disgusting, greasy fingerprints on this beautiful glass.
I don't wanna see your disgusting, greasy fingerprints when I look at that glass.
There's no job waiting for you in the United States.
If I were you, I'd become a hobo and wander Tuscany.
You just called me stupid and greasy.
And a friend doesn't do that to another friend.
I said your fingerprints are stupid.
I hate you. I hate your face.
This is good.
This the way to do it? Right here?
(glass scratching table)
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Conan & Jordan Schlansky's Italian Wine Tasting - CONAN on TBS

5910 Folder Collection
feeker published on May 29, 2019    Vvn Chen translated    Evangeline reviewed
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