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  • (catchy pop beat)

  • (dramatic music)

  • - I'm gonna need a raise, I just told him I need

  • Hello and welcome to Not At The Movies.

  • The show where we discuss the movies we haven't seen

  • but have a lot of opinions about.

  • - It's that time of year again: trophy season.

  • And we're here to talk about the top contenders of 2018.

  • First up is The Florida Project.

  • Now, I haven't seen this film,

  • but it's an overrated piece of poverty porn.

  • - Grant, I scrolled past that exact same headline,

  • and I couldn't agree more.

  • - Now I actually more than scrolled past it,

  • I clicked on it and I read the headline, so.

  • - Oh my god.

  • Well you know what I also read that the ending sucks.

  • So that must be true, it was in two different places.

  • - Well, that tears it.

  • This movie's a garbage pile, don't waste your time.

  • - Absolutely.

  • Up next, Lady Bird.

  • What can I say about Lady Bird? Wow, so good.

  • From what I've heard.

  • I haven't seen it,

  • but it is the greatest coming of age story

  • anyone has ever told.

  • - I completely agree.

  • - Six of my friends told me that this movie was so me.

  • - It is so you.

  • - Stop.

  • - And hello?! It's a female director.

  • Let's start supporting women

  • when it's convenient for me.

  • - Moving on, a film that I haven't seen

  • that I would love to discuss is The Shape of Water.

  • Not Guillermo del Toro's best work.

  • Now, when you compare it to earlier masterpieces,

  • like Pan's Labyrinth or The Devil's Backbone,

  • I haven't seen those, it just does not hold up.

  • - Well that's where I'm gonna have to

  • disagree with you, Grant. - Uh oh.

  • - I mean, we shouldn't judge an artist by their previous

  • works that we haven't seen.

  • We should be judging them by what we're not seeing today.

  • - Well, I guess you're not seeing not what I'm not seeing.

  • - Now that's something we can both agree on.

  • Moving right along, Call Me By Your Name.

  • Now, this is a masterpiece in filmmaking from what I hear,

  • and I don't know why there aren't more pictures like it.

  • - I heard it was kind of overrated from a friend of mine.

  • - Well, he sounds straight.

  • Studios are afraid to take risks on films like this

  • because they think no one will go and see it.

  • Like we didn't go and see it.

  • - Can't argue with that.

  • This next film is nominated for Best Picture,

  • but I'd be remiss if I didn't mention it.

  • Star Wars, The Last Jedi.

  • Now, I haven't seen this film,

  • but it's completely ruined my childhood.

  • It's thrown out all of my baby pictures,

  • it's killed everyone I met before the age of 10,

  • and it's ruined the franchise.

  • - Well I haven't seen it yet either,

  • but I do love to disagree.

  • So I thought it was innovative, subversive,

  • and exactly what the franchise needed, I would assume.

  • - Well you're wrong and you're a stupid person

  • and you should shut up. (Ally laughs)

  • - Last in our review is Get Out.

  • Now I haven't seen this film yet.

  • - What?! You haven't seen Get Out?

  • - I mean I'm definitely going to see it, but

  • Wait, you have?

  • - Yeah, I loved it!

  • I mean, I saw the first three minutes

  • cause I put it on super late, I fell asleep,

  • but I had dreams about racism so I think I get it.

  • - The first three minutes.

  • - I think they're gonna end up together.

  • - I hope so.

  • - Yeah.

  • - Well, Grant, who do you think

  • is taking home the big trophy this year?

  • - Well I think Get Out, because I'm not racist.

  • - Well I'm gonna go with Call Me By Your Name

  • because I'm not homophobic.

  • - (laughs) Well that does it for us.

  • We'll see you

  • - [Together] Not At The Movies!

  • (Ally laughs)

  • - You don't forgot his free billboard.

  • - [Ally] Oh my gosh, that problematic piece of shit

  • that I read about.

  • - [Grant] It was a feminist manifesto said someone else.

  • - Hey what's up, it's Ally from College Humor.

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  • I made that, this is what I like.

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