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  • James: ♪ And so, I'm offering this simple phrase... ♪

  • [tone-deaf guitar strum]

  • to kids... ♪

  • from one to.. ninety-two... ♪

  • Old Man: Uh, I'm ninety-three. Do I still count?

  • James: No, Grandpa, we HATE you!

  • Just so you know,

  • that gag was based off a comic I made back in 2014.

  • So I wanted to make a Christmas video, but

  • I didn't know what to talk about.

  • So, we're just gonna sit here and

  • roast marshmallows by this PNG of a fire.

  • [soft fire crackling]

  • Do you guys know about that soccer(*football) game

  • that happened in the middle of World War I on Christmas Day,

  • and it was between two opposing sides,

  • the Allies and the Central Powers?

  • I'm not making this up!

  • So German and British troops were in the trenches,

  • you know,

  • fighting for their lives.

  • They were in the middle of a war, after all.

  • And on Christmas Eve, German troops started singing Christmas carols,

  • then the British troops responded singing their own Christmas carols,

  • then one thing led to another,

  • and on Christmas Day they started playing soccer.

  • Well, the British troops would have called it football

  • And the German troops would have called it...

  • Fußball.

  • (Fib-b-ball?)

  • But I'm calling it soccer.

  • Yeah, I know I'm a heretic.

  • I don't think anything like that has happened in a war, ever.

  • Except for that one time in the Revolutionary War

  • when everyone stopped fighting, because the new Super Smash Brothers just came out.

  • Blue Coat: Merry feet, merry feet!

  • 'Tis not Falco! Wamba with combination!

  • [scattered screaming]

  • WHERE ART THOU?!

  • Okay,

  • that was obviously a joke.

  • Melee didn't come out for at least like,

  • another year.

  • [scoffs]

  • Stupid.

  • Anyway, what I'm wondering is..

  • do you think anyone during that game felt a little bit awkward?

  • British Soldier: So how's the war?

  • Oh, you're fearing for your life?

  • Well, that's...

  • that's goodThat's good! That means we're doing a good job!

  • Do you think whoever won the game of soccer bragged to the other team?

  • German Soldier: Haha, yes!

  • First, we beat you at fußball!

  • Next,

  • the

  • Ah, dang it, my marshmellow burned!

  • Does the story of Rudolph count as a fable?

  • What would the moral of Rudolph be?

  • I think it would be:

  • Okay, I stole that quote from something I saw

  • on the subreddit, "Im14AndThisIsDeep."

  • How come no one sings any songs about any of the other reindeer?

  • Rudolph saved Christmas once and like,

  • he didn't do it ALONE!

  • Just because he could see through the snow,

  • which by the way wouldn't have been useful in Arizona,

  • didn't mean he carried Santa's sleigh all by himself!

  • But no, just because you were bullied as a kid, you get your own song!

  • Well, enough about you going down in history, Rudolph!

  • I'm gonna make my own song about... Prancer!

  • Okay, I'll stop.

  • What if the reason Rudolph had a shiny nose

  • was because Rudolph's mom had an affair

  • with a clown?

  • That was based off a comic I made in 2014.

  • Why did the three wisemen bring baby Jesus

  • Gold, Frankenstein, and Mir?

  • Man: What kind of baby would want that?

  • Okay, that was also based off a comic I made in 2014.

  • Man, 2014 was just my year!

  • Please read my comics.

  • You know what? I'm not done talking about Rudolph. You guys have all seen the stop-motion movie

  • they made about him in the 60s, right?

  • You know, about the elf who wants to be a dentist.

  • Who wouldn't?

  • (Get ready, headphone users...)

  • WhY wErEnT YoU aT eLf PrAcTiCe?!?!?!?!??!

  • Well, there's one scene in the movie where Yukon Cornelius sacrifices himself to kill the abominable snowman,

  • and he saves all of his friends (and also indirectly saves Christmas), but whatever, he doesn't get a song.

  • But then, later in the movie, he just walks through the front door,

  • and everyone's wondering how he survived,

  • and Rudolph even says:

  • [In unison] "But, but you went over the side of a cliff!"

  • And then Yukon tells everyone the answer:

  • [In unison] "Didn't I ever tell you about bumbos?"

  • "Bumbos bounce!"

  • And then everyone just laughs it off like it was a hilarious joke

  • and doesn't ask him any more questions.

  • Even as a kid, I thought that was a stupid explanation.

  • What does that mean, "bumbos bounce"?

  • like, did you two fall off the cliff, and then when you hit the bottom just...

  • trampoline yourself all the way back up? Oh, wait, no,

  • I think I know what it means. it means the writers didn't want to kill off a character,

  • so they just came up with a plot device to make him live!

  • [Voice raises] You know, because you can't have death in a kids' movie!

  • No one DIES! [blows raspberry]

  • Not even the bad guy dies.

  • How does Santa deliver the houses without chimneys?

  • I think Tim Allen tried to explain it once.

  • Anyway, I think that's gonna do it for this video. I kept it short

  • so that way, I have more time to spend Christmas with my family,

  • and it also gives me more time to wrap presents.

  • Because, you know, I'm just terrible at wrapping.

  • Hey guys, thanks for watching.

  • If you want to hear a rap song about Prancer, well

  • you're in luck, 'cause I made one and it's up on my second channel.

  • Well, okay, I didn't sing the song.

  • Dave from "BoyinaBand" did, and he did an amazing job.

  • If you didn't know I had a second channel, that's 'cause

  • this is the first time I'm mentioning it in an animation.

  • I mean it's pretty empty right now, but I'm planning on posting some "random XD mémés rawr."

  • And I wouldn't say this if my grandma didn't watch my videos, but the song has a swear word in it.

  • I know I'm supposed to be family-friendly, but I liked it too much,

  • so I left it in.

  • Also I think I do this in every video now, but I really need to thank my three colorers (colorists);

  • they're basically working for me full-time now.

  • And they all have their own channels that they somehow have enough time to post on,

  • and you should all check them out;

  • they're really good. Also, my friend "Ryder" posted a

  • 2017 year review, and I'm in it, so you should check that out.

  • Merry Christmas, everyone,

  • and if you don't celebrate Christmas,

  • why did you watch this video all the way to the end?

  • Stay safe, and wear your seatbelt.

James: ♪ And so, I'm offering this simple phrase... ♪

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B1 US rudolph christmas soccer german war british

Christmas Contemplations

  • 83 2
    高偉翔 posted on 2018/01/18
Video vocabulary