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  • - (TV viewer) Reality TV is still real to me, dammit!

  • - (Ian) SHUT UP!!!

  • - (woman) I totally just saw a ghost!

  • - (man) Oh yeah, there's definitely a ghost here.

  • Let's spend the entire episode investigating.

  • - This show's so stupid.

  • Everyone knows ghosts aren't real.

  • - (sighs) It's just a TV show.

  • Can you imagine how boring it'd be

  • if all TV shows were actually realistic?

  • If TV Shows Were Real 3

  • Black Mirror

  • - Huh?

  • What?

  • Whoa!

  • Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

  • - Help! Somebody help me, please.

  • - We're the agents of S.H.E.I.L.D.

  • - Don't worry, sir. You're safe!

  • - Oh, so you're NOT the Avengers?

  • - Well, not exactly.

  • I mean, we have agent Coulson and he was in the first Avengers,

  • and he has a bionic hand. - A bionic hand.

  • - So we're totally f*cked?

  • - Yeah. - Yup.

  • How I Met Your Mother

  • - Dad, tell us how you met mom.

  • - Yeah, tell us.

  • - (dad) Sure, but wouldn't you rather

  • I told you about all the girls I slept with beforehand,

  • and THEN I'll tell you about how your mom brutually died

  • of an awful disease?

  • I think it will take about nine years, so get comfy!

  • (sobbing)

  • American Horror Story

  • - What's even scary about this show?

  • - Yeah, we're just two hot male models walking down a hallway.

  • - Mmm, Mama June, I need my s'ghetti and Go Go Juice.

  • - (squeals) Kill it! - DAAAHHH!

  • - Squeamy genie.

  • Ow.

  • House of Cards

  • - Of course, Mrs. Secretary. We'll get right on that.

  • What the secretary doesn't realize

  • is by the end of the day I'm gonna throw her

  • in front of a train.

  • - (secretary) What did you just say?

  • - Uh, nothing.

  • - You know, we can still hear you

  • when you talk to the camera, right?

  • - Uh... no, you can't.

  • Everybody Loves Raymond

  • - I love you, Raymond.

  • - I love you, Ray.

  • - I love you, Raymond!

  • - I love you too.

  • - Aw, everybody loves me!

  • Everybody Hates Chris

  • - I hate you, Chris! - I hate you, Chris.

  • - I HATE you, Chris! - I hate you too, Chris!

  • - Yeah, f*ck you, Chris!

  • Blindspot

  • - Aw, the guy behind me has his blinkers on

  • but I just can't see him.

  • Oh, fck! Oh, fck!

  • Oh, he's right in my blind spot.

  • Oh, goddamn it. What am I gonna do?!

  • The King of Queens

  • - I just don't get it.

  • You were so hot.

  • Why are you with a fat ordinary guy

  • with no redeeming traits whatsoever?

  • He's literally the definition of mediocre.

  • - He's the funniest guy ever!

  • - Hey.

  • (hysterical laughter) (laugh track)

  • Oh! See how many people he just made laugh?

  • I don't even know where those people are.

  • (farting) (laugh track)

  • Switched at Birth

  • - I know this may be hard to hear,

  • but your child was switched at birth.

  • You've been raising somebody else's child.

  • - How dare you! THIS IS MY CHILD!!!

  • - He has my ears!

  • - He has my dig.

  • - See, told you it would be dumb.

  • Whatever, I'm actually late for my ghost hunting job anyway.

  • - (voice-over) Coming up on Ghost Hunters.

  • - I know there's a ghost up here!

  • There's a ghost in here.

  • Whoaaaaaa!

  • Oh my god! There it is!

  • I caught the ghost!

  • Oh my god!

  • - (Ian) Hey, guys, thank you so much for subscribing.

  • If you guys wanna see bloopers from this video,

  • and a scene from Undercover Boss...

  • - Hey, I think there's something off about this new guy.

  • - Hey, guys!

  • What do you say we get paid less?

  • - (Ian) ...click the video on the left.

  • And if you want to see the first episode of our new series

  • Part Timers, click the video on the right.

  • - He's totally hitting on you.

  • - Me? He's hitting on you!

  • - I'm not gonna have sex with him.

  • - Neither am I.

  • - We're talking about jail time here.

  • - (Ian) And if you have one of those touch screenie thingies,

  • all the links are in the description below.

- (TV viewer) Reality TV is still real to me, dammit!

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