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  • *Gibberish*

  • What I'm hearing is The Sims.

  • Exactly! But... prison Sims!

  • Hi guys and welcome to Rosie and I's review of

  • Orange is the New Black Season 3!

  • (French accent) Orange is the new Noir.

  • Okay, where do you wanna start? Do you wanna start with... ooo...

  • Character analysis? Or do you wanna start with... ooo...

  • -Plot synopsis? -Plot synopsis!

  • -One thing I was mildly disappointed with... -Yeah.

  • In the first episode, there wasn't enough Piper.

  • But what I will say... is that I don't think I like her anymore!

  • I personally, this is just my own opinion,

  • I never liked Piper. From series 1 I didn't like her.

  • She's self-involved, she's manipulative...

  • She annoys me how she plays dumb, but then she's read all these books

  • It's like uggghhh... I hate people like you!

  • If we were at school, you'd be the popular and annoying girl, and I'd also be the popular and annoying girl,

  • but you'd be more annoying than me. Ugghhh!

  • Everyone had their periods at the same time.

  • -Did they all sync up prison-style? -That's what they said.

  • ...I see.

  • -Sassy, Latino... -Gloria.

  • -Not the mum, her sister who runs the kitchen. -Gloria!

  • She was being, like, sassy to one of the girls,

  • and she was like, "Do you got your period today?"

  • "Do you got your period"... note to self, that's prison talk.

  • Yeah, and she was like "yeah", and she was like "yeah, same here",

  • and then they insinuated that Gloria also had her period.

  • Everyone in Litchfield Prison can sync up, why haven't we? It's been four years...

  • Well, what's the keen on Ruby Rose? Let's talk about Ruby Rose...

  • She's butch, but she's really sexy with it... but she's also butch with it.

  • But is she really sexy with it?

  • I thought she was, but I didn't like her character

  • -I think her character was shit. -No, I love her accent,

  • down with it.

  • Oh, wasn't it a bit racist that they called the Australian one Stella?

  • That is racist, isn't it?

  • Is it racist? Or is it more racist that you kept on calling her Australia

  • through the entire season!

  • "Piper's gonna end up with Australia!" "Ooo, Australia's doing the panty business!"

  • "Australia's gonna take her money!" "Fuck you, Australia."

  • This is how it happened, this is the build-up between Piper and Australia

  • in that one episode that it took them to kiss.

  • (Australian accent) "When you know someone's into you, you just kinda know..."

  • And then she was like, "but I don't know!"

  • So, Red, and Healy... I ship it.

  • Is Alex dead... I don't think they're gonna kill her off.

  • I reckon she's gonna hold her own, I reckon she's gonna cut that guy

  • and, maybe even get more time, because think about it Rosie!

  • Netflix needs to extend their sentences!

  • Piper just cheated on her, and get beat up, and called her paranoid.

  • She's really nasty, I don't think they're gonna get back together.

  • You're right...

  • Yeah, and they had lesbian bed death.

  • They did have lesbian bed death...

  • -Yeah, very scary subject... -You're really scared about this, aren't you?

  • I'm scared it's gonna happen one day...

  • Rosie's really scared because Piper and Alex suffered from lesbian bed death

  • but Rosie and I are gonna really suffer from it

  • and Rosie hasn't stopped talking about it since Netflix introduced this to our lives

  • -So... -Basically I've been like,

  • let's keep having sex so we don't have lesbian bed death.

  • So thanks, Netflix. ;)

  • Alright Rosie, so, out of all the lesbian youtubers

  • -Right. -Or youtubers,

  • we're not exclusive here,

  • -Okay, any youtubers... -Who would be who,

  • in Litchfield Woman's Prison?

  • Okay, I'm gonna name some, and you've gotta say who they would be.

  • Let's start with... Hannah Hart.

  • Hannah Hart would be Ruby Rose.

  • Tyler Oakley... would be Taystee.

  • Why?!

  • Because they're both so cheerful.

  • Shannon would be Ruby Rose.

  • Who would Shannon be...

  • Shannon would be...

  • She might be perfection.

  • Ally Hills.

  • Oh, I feel like if Stevie's the Latino girl with the tear,

  • no I feel like that's Ally, and Stevie's her friend.

  • Sister?

  • Are they sisters?

  • -I don't know, are they sisters? -I think they're not.

  • What I've learned, is that it's okay to cheat on your girlfriend, as long as you're in prison.

  • Yeah, that's what I've learned.

  • What if we were in prison together and I cheated on you?

  • Hang on, Alex doesn't know... that Piper cheated on her

  • so if she's alive, she doesn't know. She's suspected it,

  • but she never saw them get it on.

  • Oh, so she's gonna escape death by the skin of her teeth then realise

  • that her stupid, bitch girlfriend is already sleeping with Justin Bieber.

  • Okay guys that was our review of Orange is the New Black Season 3

  • make sure you like, comment and subscribe

  • to this channel if you would like to see more of us in your subscription boxes

  • each week, that's twice a week.

  • I'm gonna show you how to sign off a video, okay?

  • Even if you're (???), okay, ready?

  • Okay bye guys, see you soon, take care

  • -So great to see you... -BYYYYEEEEE

  • Are you really interrupting my bit?

  • I married you for a reason, this was not one of them.

  • Seriously though, who the heck ships Red and Healy?!

*Gibberish*

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