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  • [ THUNDER CRASHES ]

  • >> 12 TRILLION YEARS BEFORE THE

  • ALLEGED BIG BANG LIVED

  • KING STAR KING, THE GREATEST

  • HERO WHO EVER WAS, IS, OR SHALL

  • BE.

  • >> HA HA!

  • FELICITATIONS ARE IN ORDER FOR

  • ME, POOZA!

  • TONIGHT I DECLARE MY LOVE FOR

  • THE PRINCESS SNOW WHITE.

  • >> FWEE!

  • HOT DIGGITY-DIGGITY ZING!

  • WOW!

  • SMART MOVE, BOSS!

  • [ SCREECHES ]

  • >> I STOP YOU, KING STAR KING.

  • FOR TODAY I TAKE YOUR SOUL!

  • >> SILENCE, DEVIL DEATH CHIMP!

  • I EXPUNGE YOUR ROTTING FACE.

  • >> AAH!

  • [ SPLAT! ]

  • RINGS FROM THE EARS OF DEATH.

  • CAN THERE BE A MORE ROMANTIC

  • GIFT?

  • >> ♪ SEXUALLY PURE ♪

  • ♪ FREE OF GUILT ♪

  • ♪ FREE OF TAINT ♪

  • ♪ UNFIDDLED WITH ♪

  • ♪ SKIN LIKE MILK ♪

  • >> FOR YOU, SNOW WHITE, THE

  • EARRINGS OF DEATH HIMSELF!

  • >> [ GASPS ]

  • KING STAR KING, I'M NAKED!

  • >> UH...

  • HM, SO YOU ARE.

  • BLBLBLBLBLBLBBLBLBLBLBL.

  • >> OOH!

  • [ GIGGLES ]

  • [ ENGINE IDLING ]

  • [ ENGINE REVS ]

  • HAIL, GOD STAR GOD!

  • KING STAR KING IS GAZING UPON

  • THE EROTIC NAKEDNESS OF YOUR

  • DAUGHTER IN THE ROYAL LAVATORY!

  • >> RAAH! RAAH?! NAKED?!

  • RAAAAAAAAAH!

  • >> BLBLBLBLBLBLBL.

  • >> KING STAR KING, YOU ROTTEN,

  • STINKING PERVERTOPHILE!

  • I ERASE YOUR MEMORY AND EXILE

  • YOU FROM THIS REALLY COOL PLACE!

  • [ SPLURT! ]

  • FOREVER!

  • >> KING STAR KING'S MIND WAS

  • ERASED.

  • HE WAS EXILED FROM THE HEAVENLY

  • REALM AND MAGICALLY TELEPORTED

  • INTO A DUMPSTER BEHIND AN

  • ALL-NIGHT WAFFLE RESTAURANT

  • LOCATED IN THE KRUDZONE, A

  • PLACE FILLED WITH DISEASED

  • WOMEN, TERRIBLE FOOD, AND SOME

  • MONSTERS.

  • >> FAT MAN BREAKFAST SPECIAL

  • SIDE OF BACON, TWO OVER EASY!

  • >> FAT MAN BREAKFAST SPECIAL

  • SIDE OF BACON, LET IT BE SO!

  • [ DING! ]

  • [ BELL RINGS ]

  • [ TWINKLING ]

  • >> WHAT THE HELL?

  • [ ALL GASP ]

  • HOLY PISS BUCKET, IT'S

  • SNOW WHITE IN MY WAFFLE JOINT!

  • WELCOME TO HANK'S WAFFLES,

  • PRINCESS SNOW WHITE,

  • YOUR MAJESTY.

  • WHAT BRINGS YOU DOWN TO THE

  • KRUDZONE WITH US REPULSIVE

  • KRUDZONIANS?

  • >> WE'VE BEEN SEARCHING FOR

  • SOMEONE FOR A LONG TIME.

  • YOU DON'T KNOW OF

  • KING STAR KING, DO YOU?

  • >> KING STAR KING?

  • IN THIS FART HOLE?

  • [ CHUCKLES ]

  • HEY, BIG BOOBS, FILL UP THE

  • PRINCESS' WATER GLASS.

  • YOU SEEM YOU SEEM SAD.

  • HOW 'BOUT A WAFFLE?

  • >> HOW RUDE OF ME.

  • THIS IS YOUR LIVELIHOOD.

  • YES, KIND SIR, YOUR BEST WAFFLE.

  • >> ONE SUPREME WAFFLE PLATTER

  • NOW, AND MAKE IT HOT!

  • IT'S FOR A MOTHER[BLEEP]

  • PRINCESS!

  • [ DING! ]

  • >> ORDER UP!

  • >> [ GASPS ] IT CAN'T BE!

  • I'VE SEARCHED THE GIGANTIVERSE

  • FOR YOU!

  • >> MADAM, MY EGGS ARE BURNING.

  • >> DON'T YOU REMEMBER?

  • PERHAPS THIS WILL HELP.

  • [ MOANING ]

  • >> I'M STARTING TO REMEMBER.

  • MY MEMORY WAS ERASED.

  • >> FWEE!

  • >> RAAAAH!

  • >> I AM KING STAR KING, AND YOU

  • ARE MY BRIDE!

  • [ THUNDER CRASHES ]

  • >> IT SEEMS A FAIRY-TALE ENDING

  • IS IN ORDER.

  • BUT PRINCESSES SHOULD NEVER

  • WANDER INTO THE KRUDZONE, FOR

  • WHEN THEY DO, THEY ARE NO LONGER

  • PROTECTED BY THEIR ROYAL REALM.

  • >> GIVE ME ONE ORDER OF FINE

  • ROYAL POONANI TO GO!

  • >> IT'S THAT SPRING BUNNY

  • THE DUKE OF WRONG!

  • >> RIGHT YOU WERE, MEGA MELONS.

  • >> SPRING BUNNY?

  • WHAT DO YOU WANT?

  • >> GET YOUR HOOCHIE OVER HERE,

  • SNOW WHITE.

  • >> UNHAND SNOW WHITE,

  • EVIL BUNNY, FOR I AM KING

  • [ GRUNTING ]

  • [ GRUNTS ]

  • >> KING STAR KING!

  • OOMF!

  • >> NEXT STOP, VIRGIN-POWERED

  • EVIL ROBOT!

  • HAVE AN EASTER EGG...

  • [ GROANS ]

  • ...KING STAR KING.

  • [ SNIFFS ]

  • [ SIGHS ]

  • MOTHER[BLEEP]!

  • [ WHISTLE! BOOM! ]

  • >> OH, I'M BLEEDING.

  • ALMOST DEAD. HELP!

  • >> I SUMMON MY GALACTIC ROYAL

  • ENCHANTMENTS AND SORTILEGES.

  • [ INHALES DEEPLY, GULPS ]

  • [ CHA-CHING! ]

  • EXTRUDE THESE BULLETS!

  • AND AMELIORATE MY WOUNDS!

  • >> YEAH, DO THAT TO ME, PLEASE.

  • AT LEAST STOP THE BLEEDING.

  • >> TAKE HEART, HANK WAFFLES.

  • WE CAN SAVE THE PRINCESS.

  • I MUST AGGLOMERATE A TEAM OF

  • INCREDIBLE HEROES!

  • [ SQUISH! ]

  • I SUMMON...POOZA THE WIZARD!

  • >> ZWING!

  • KING STAR KING, WHERE HAVE YOU

  • BEEN ALL THESE YEARS?!

  • >> IT IS A PROLONGED ABNORMAL

  • TALE, OLD FRIEND POOZA, MAGIC

  • CHUM.

  • CAN YOU SAVE THIS LONELY HUMAN

  • AND MAKE HIM UNSCATHED AS

  • BEFORE?

  • >> [ Weakly ] YES, PLEASE.

  • JUST MAKE ME UNSCATHED.

  • >> MAGIC! MAGIC! MAGIC!

  • >> PUT THE SOUL OF HANK WAFFLES

  • INTO HIS BELOVED WAFFLE MASCOT

  • AND LEAVE HIS CRETINOUS HUMAN

  • SHELL BEHIND!

  • >> I LIKE MY CRETINOUS HUMAN

  • SHELL, PLEASE.

  • >> WAZOO! WAZOO!

  • >> AAAAAAAH!

  • WHAT THE HELL?!

  • >> HA HA! NOW YOU ARE A HERO!

  • >> AAH!