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  • Me?

  • Well...

  • uh, January 20th. Yes.

  • Someplace off--I don't even remember.

  • Up in the DMZ.

  • Walked into a whole battalion of them.

  • Got shot in the foot.

  • I got up like I was...

  • back in the woods again,

  • like I was John fuckin' Wayne,

  • emptying a mag, screaming, "Come on, Charlie!

  • Motherfucker, come on out, Charlie!"

  • Rat-tat-tat-tat.

  • I heard this crack above my right ear,

  • and I just felt my body...

  • drop out from under me.

  • Christ, I thought I was dead for sure.

  • Was the, uh...

  • How was the hospital?

  • It sucked.

  • I know.

  • Really bad.

  • I'll tell you something, Ronnie...

  • sometimes at night...

  • I get these headaches, you know?

  • They're bad.

  • And, uh...

  • they just kind of come over me,

  • and these doctors don't know shit, you know.

  • They just come, like I'm going crazy or something.

  • I don't feel-- I don't feel like me anymore, you know?

  • I feel like-- When they come,

  • I feel like somebody else.

  • What do you do?

  • Nothing. Not a thing, you know?

  • Well...mostly I do a lot of drugs.

  • Do anything you can, you know?

  • Y-you get through it any way you can.

  • When I was in the hospital,

  • I thought, "Yeah. yeah, this makes sense."

  • What makes sense?

  • 'Cause I failed, Timmy.

  • What are you talking about?

  • 'Cause I...

  • 'Cause I killed someone-- some people. I--

  • I made some terrible...

  • mistakes.

  • Ronnie, we all made mistakes. I mean, you...

  • you had no choice.

  • Those pansy demonstrators

  • will never understand.

  • Don't talk about it.

  • It was insane over there.

  • Sometimes I wish-- I wish I'd--

  • When I got shot in the foot,

  • I could have laid down.

  • Who gives a fuck now if I was a hero or not?

  • I was paralyzed, castrated that day. Why?

  • 'Cause I was so s-- stupid.

  • I'd have my dick and my balls now, and I think--

  • I think, Timmy, I'd give everything I believe in,

  • everything I got-- all my values

  • just to have my body again,

  • just to be whole again.

  • But I'm not whole.

  • I never will be, and that's...

  • the way it is, isn't it?

  • For Christ's sake, Ronnie...

  • it's your birthday.

  • You're alive.

  • You made it.

  • Smile.

Me?

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