I THINK WE'VE HAD ENOUGH FUN.

IT'S TIME FOR US TO GET A LITTLE BIT MORE SERIOUS.

SYRIA.

NOW, THE WHOLE ISSUE OF WHETHER OR NOT TO LET SYRIAN REFUGEES

INTO THE UNITED STATES IS A BALANCING ACT BETWEEN MORAL

RESPONSIBILITY AND THE RISK OF INCREASED THREATS.

IT'S HARD TO GET A HANDLE ON THE WHOLE SITUATION.

AND LUCKILY, REPUBLICAN PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE MIKE

HUCKABEE HAS BEEN TRYING HIS BEST TO EXPLAIN THIS ISSUE IN A

WAY THAT EVERYONE CAN UNDERSTAND.

>> YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TENS OF THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE COMING HERE

FROM THE MIDDLE EAST.

YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHO THEY ARE.

THERE'S NO WAY TO CHECK THEM.

LET ME ASK THIS-- IF YOU BOUGHT A FIVE-POUND BAG OF PEANUTS AND

YOU KNEW IN THE FIVE-POUND BAG OF PEANUTS THERE WERE ABOUT 10

PEANUTS THAT WERE DEADLY POISONOUS, WOULD YOU FEED THEM

TO YOUR KID?

( LAUGHTER )

>> Trevor: WELL, IT DEPENDS-- HOW ( BLEEP ) ARE YOUR KIDS?

( APPLAUSE )

( CHEERS )

BECAUSE IF THEY'RE THE KIND OF PEOPLE WHO COMPARE SUFFERING

REFUGEES TO TAINTED PEANUTS, THEN MAYBE.

( LAUGHTER ) ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

I UNDERSTAND YOUR POSITION IS THAT THE POSSIBILITY OF A FEW

DANGEROUS REFUGEES MEANS THAT WE SHOULDN'T ADMIT ANY OF THEM IN.

BUT, YOU KNOW, MAYBE YOU COULD TRY EXPRESSING THAT THOUGHT IN A

LESS-CALLOUS WAY.

>> DOES IT MAKE ANY SENSE THAT WE WOULD SAY, "WELL, WE'RE GOING

TO BRING IN TENS OF THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE.

WE HAVE NO IDEA WHO THEY ARE.

WHEN CHIPOTLE HAD AN OUTBREAK OF E. COLI JUST RECENTLY, WHAT DID

THEY DO?

THEY CLOSED ALL THE CHIPOTLE RESTAURANTS.

I MEAN, HOW MANY GALLONS OF TAINTED MILK DO WE TOLERATE

BEFORE WE SAY, "TAKE IT OFF THE SHELVES IN?

>> Trevor: ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW WHAT?

GO BACK TO PEANUTS.

THAT WAS BETTER.

CLEARLY, MIKE HUCKABEE DOESN'T WANT SYRIAN REFUGEES COMING TO

AMERICA, BUT AS A PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE HE NEEDS A PLAN FOR

THE MIDDLE EAST UNLESS HE WAS GOING TO ABANDON THE REGION.

>> I DON'T THINK WE CAN ABANDON THE REGION FOR THE SIMPLE REASON

IT DOESN'T GET BETTER WITH AGE.

THIS ISN'T CHEESE.

THIS ISN'T BEEF.

IT'S NOT WINE.

THIS IS TERRORISM.

>> Trevor: THAT IS THE WORST END TO A TASTE TEST EVER.

( LAUGHTER )

THIS IS NOT CHEESE.

THIS IS NOT BEEF.

IT'S NOT WINE.

IT'S TERRORISM!

AAHHH!

AAAHHH!

( APPLAUSE )

NOW, IS IT JUST ME OR IS MIKE HUCKABEE ALWAYS BRINGING

EVERYTHING BACK TO FOOD?

I MEAN, JUST LOOK AT THE SYRIANS.

HE'S COMPARED THEM TO PEANUTS, CHIPOTLE, MILK, CHEESE, BEEF,

AND WINE.

AND THAT'S JUST THE APPETIZER.

ONCE YOU NOTICE IT, YOU START TO SEE IT EVERYWHERE.

WHATEVER THE TOPIC IS, MIKE HUCKABEE ALWAYS BRINGS UP FOOD.

FOR INSTANCE, SOCIAL SECURITY.

>> THEY'RE ALWAYS GOING TO SAY WE'RE GOING TO FIX THIS ONE DAY.

NO, THEY'RE NOT.

IT'S LIKE A 400-POUND MAN SAYING I'M GOING TO GO ON A DIET BUT

I'M EATING A SACK OF KRISPY KREME BEFORE I DO.

>> Trevor: A SACK OF KRISPY KREMES?

IS THAT EVEN AWE THING.

I'M JUST PICTURING HUCKABEE STANDING THERE, "I'D LIKE A

SMALL COFFEE AND ONE SASK KRISPY KREMES."

"SORRY, SIR, WE DON'T SELL THEM BY SACKS."

"IT'S OKAY, I BROUGHT MY OWN."

HOW ABOUT THE CROWDED FIELD OF G.O.P. CANDIDATES?

>> REPUBLICANS HAVE A WHOLE BUFFET.

I MEAN, WE ARE THE GOLDEN CORAL CORCORRAL OF POLITICS.

>> Trevor: REPUBLICANS ARE THE GOLDEN CORRAL BUFFET.

WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?

WHATEVER YOU CHOOSE, IT'S ALL GOING TO MAKE YOU SICK?

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

WHAT ABOUT N.S.A. SURVEILLANCE?

>> THE N.S.A. IS COLLECTING ENORMOUS AMOUNTS OF METADATA ON

ALL OF US.

THEY CAN KNOW WHO I TALKED TO LAST THURSDAY WHEN I ORDERED

PIZZA AND WHAT I WANTED ON IT.

( LAUGHTER )

>> Trevor: NOW-- WHAT ARE YOU PUTTING ON YOUR PIZZA THAT

YOU DON'T WANT THE N.S.A. TO KNOW ABOUT?

"HI, I CAN HAVE AN EXTRA LARGE PIZZA WITH WOMEN'S PANTIES ON

TOP?

ACTUALLY, ACTUALLY, CAN YOU HIDE THE PANTIES IN THE CHEESE?

THAT WAY I HAVE TO FIND THEM."

(LAUGHTER )

REALLY, ONCE YOU LOOK AT IT, MIKE HUCKABEE'S ENTIRE TAKE ON

POLITICS IS FOOD BASED.

>> POLITICS IS LIKE OPENING A BASKIN ROBBINS STORE.

IF YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE SHOULD SAUSAGE, YOU HAVE TO KILL SOME

PIGS.

I WISH I COULD HAVE HAD SOME MEAT I COULD PUT IN THE MEAT

LOCKER.

WE BETTER WAKE UP AND SMELL THE FALAFEL.

WE'RE TALKING CHICK AND EGG HERE.

BACON-WRAPPED SHRIMP.

THE POPEYES' CHICKEN IN TERMINAL "B."

I CUT MYSELF MAKING SALADS.

PRESIDENT OBAMA GOT ROLLED LIKE A CALIFORNIA SUSHI.

>> Trevor: THAT IS SO MANY FOOL OF FOOD METAPHORS, IT'S TOO

MUCH.