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  • - Well, hello everyone!

  • My name is Tyler Oakley, and I am here with

  • the one and only Sawyer Hartman!

  • - Hi!

  • - I know that Christmas was a couple days ago

  • but that doesn't mean that we can't

  • get into the Christmas spirit

  • the only way we know how.

  • We are going to be playing a little game.

  • Are you familiar with the 12 Days of Christmas?

  • - Yeah, the partridges. - [Tyler] Yes, yes, yes.

  • Each day, somebody gave somebody some gifts, okay,

  • so like a partridge in a pear tree, five golden rings, etc.

  • So we are going to be trying to figure out

  • how much each day's worth of gifts would actually cost,

  • so we are going to write down on our whiteboards

  • how much we think it is. - [Sawyer] Okay.

  • - [Tyler] And the person furthest from the real price--

  • - [Sawyer] Drinks. - [Tyler] has to drink.

  • First day, a partridge in a pear tree.

  • How much do you think that costs?

  • - How big is the tree? - [Tyler] Listen.

  • - What the fuck is a partridge?

  • - (laughs) It's a bird!

  • - [Sawyer] I thought it was a fruit.

  • - Oh my.

  • - I always wondered why there would be

  • a partridge in a pear tree. - [Tyler] The pear--

  • - [Sawyer] Shouldn't there be pears there?

  • Not partridges...

  • It sounds like cartridge. - [Tyler] A bird.

  • - Alright, a bird in a tree.

  • What's your price on that?

  • Four foot, five foot, six foot tree?

  • I need to know these things.

  • - I'm thinking like a nice subtle three foot.

  • - A shrub? - [Tyler] A shrub.

  • - [Sawyer] So a bush? - [Tyler] A Christmas shrub.

  • - [Sawyer] A bird in a bush?

  • - A bird in a bush, how much you think?

  • - Okay, I got it. - A rotisserie chicken...

  • - Nope, I got it - [Tyler] Is like 3.99-

  • Ready, I said two thousand dollars.

  • - I said 350, it's a fucking bird in a bush.

  • - I want like a nice ass bird.

  • - It's not a gold bird wearing a Louis Vuitton necklace.

  • - 200 dollars. - Yeah! Drink, bitch!

  • What do you want, what's your poison?

  • - I don't know.

  • - Are you going to mix it with the nog?

  • - Well, yeah, you have to. (laughs)

  • Don't ever ask me a question like that.

  • Okay, a little bit of this.

  • Oh, that does not look good.

  • Count me down. - Three, two, one.

  • Whoa.... - [Tyler] Merry Christmas!

  • - [Sawyer] What, is that not good?

  • Nog isn't good?

  • No, you don't like that?

  • - It's really good.

  • - If you can't handle the consistency,

  • I know I can't handle the consistency.

  • - [Tyler] 11 more, let's go.

  • Okay, number two, two turtle doves.

  • These are also birds.

  • - Do they come with a cage?

  • Is it a bundle deal?

  • - I'm thinking, like, yes. - [Sawyer] Alright.

  • - [Tyler] 500 dollars. - [Sawyer] 210.

  • - 125, are you kidding? - [Sawyer] (cheers)

  • Oh my god, this is a great night!

  • - I guess I'm going to go with the Fireball.

  • - Ah, geez.

  • You are just going to be sloppy.

  • You're going to be trolling Grindr tonight.

  • - (laughs) That's true.

  • - Three, two, one, and take it.

  • There you go, you're getting all smokey eyed.

  • - Okay! - What's on the third day?

  • - Three French hens.

  • These are all birds.

  • - The dude who wrote this has a serious bird fetish.

  • - You know what a furry is?

  • - Yeah, it's when they dress up

  • as a stuffed animal and then fuck.

  • That's right, right? - [Tyler] I mean, yeah.

  • - I wouldn't even know where to shop

  • for one French hen. - [Tyler] France!

  • Okay, what did you say?

  • - 827 dollars.

  • - I said 299.

  • - Is it fucking on sale?

  • - Oh, yes, it's 165!

  • Time for you to drink, pick a drink.

  • - I'm going to go with... - [Tyler] Pick a drink.

  • Three, two, okay.

  • Cauli-birds?

  • - Cauli-birds? Like made of cauliflower?

  • A cauliflower dwelling bird?

  • - Yeah, a bird that lives in a cauliflower.

  • - Well, I don't know how big a cauliflower is.

  • - Neither do I.

  • Four cauli-birds. - Four of them?

  • - Four.

  • - Well, say they're like 27.99 each.

  • - Okay, well, you know a cauli-bird, in this economy.

  • Outrageous.

  • - You know Kanye West had a cauli-bird

  • in his concert though.

  • - Before you keep talking, absolutely don't.

  • - Why is that racist, what's racist?

  • - I didn't say it was racists.

  • It's not even offensive!

  • I said, 200 dollars. - 110.

  • - Oh, very close call.

  • - Come on, four calling-- Fuck you!

  • - Yes, 519 dollars and 96 cents.

  • Oh, that is curdling like--

  • - Have you ever seen American Pie?

  • It's like when the guy jizzes all up in the beer

  • and the girl drinks it.

  • - Three, two, you're not going to be okay with that.

  • - It's slippery. - [Tyler] (laughs)

  • She loves it.

  • - Does this have gluten?

  • - Hey, gluten.

  • Five golden rings, the first non-bird.

  • I'm talking Kay Jewelers, Medawar Jewelers.

  • - Medawar? - She went to...

  • Oh, she went to Jared.

  • Jared. - He went to Jared.

  • - She went, equality!

  • - I buy my beautiful girls platinum and diamonds.

  • I don't know about the gold.

  • You know.

  • - Well, I buy aluminum.

  • - Excuse me, do you have recyclable plastic?

  • - Excuse me, does this ring have gluten?

  • I say 700 dollars. - 1000.

  • Okay, did you mark my carpet?

  • You know how I feel about my carpet.

  • - I know, geez.

  • - You have to eat my ass if you did.

  • 750! That's you drinking, bitch.

  • Pour a shot, pour a shot, pour a shot.

  • - Oh, lord.

  • - Three, two, one.

  • Merry Christmas.

  • (laughs)

  • Six geese a laying, 1,130. - 69 dollars.

  • It's a happy 69.

  • - Oh, that's really fucking tender.

  • Christmas is all about giving back,

  • so like when somebody is eating your ass,

  • you eat their ass too.

  • - 210 dollars, you drink.

  • - Shit, I'm a gonna drink.

  • - Jesus. - Did somebody say Cheez Its?

  • I would kill for a Cheez It.

  • - Three, two, 14, 24, six, 48, zero, one, go.

  • 12, 11, sorry just kidding.

  • Go, man, I'm waiting on you.

  • - Seven swans a swimming.

  • - Fucking... this should be called

  • the drunk bird fetish challenge.

  • - What the fuck, how much--

  • This is the what the fuck does a bird cost challenge?

  • - I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it.

  • Alright, I'm good, I'm good.

  • Write yours down.

  • - Did you put one dollar?

  • - No, I didn't.

  • Oh, I love that word, a gaggle.

  • A gaggle of geese.

  • Imagine if I text a girl,

  • yo, yeah, I'm with a gaggle of my homies.

  • - A squad of geese is called a gaggle.

  • You know that, right?

  • Bitch, you know that