Name: 生氣的時候怎麼辦？ ► 關於就在於這90秒... - Mo Gawdat 莫・加多（中英字幕）
Uploaded: 2024-12-31T04:55:34.000Z
Duration: 3 min 5 s
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You cannot be angry for more than 90 seconds.

What happens is you run the thought in your head again and you renew your 90 seconds.

Basic passive voice

Biggest hack I was ever told was when I hosted my best, one of my dear, dear friends, Jill Balty-Taylor, if you know her, neuroscientist.

And she basically studied our behavior when we are negative.

And she says, from the second you are triggered on the negative side.

To the second that you're filled with stress hormones.

To the second that you took an action and those, or you didn't, but those hormones were flushed out of your body is 90 seconds.

But then what happens is you run the thought in your head again and you renew your 90 seconds.

Then you run it again unconsciously and you renew your 90 seconds.

While in reality, what you get after those 90 seconds is a buffer.

You get a mix, a cocktail of weird emotions, right?

You know, I hate those guys that took it.

You can have a cocktail of those emotions.

And if you actually observe, you get those emotions.

And then there is that tiny buffer, right?

That tiny buffer allows you to go and say, now what am I going to do?

I mean, I can be angry at the world, or I can go buy another phone, or I can go, you know, cancel my SIM, or I can, you know, go to my computer and block the phone, right?

And once you get into that buffer, suddenly you move in the right direction.

Now, I basically put that buffer in a flow chart.

I always say, if I were to teach the world happiness, I need to be the Olympic champion of the sport.

I need to be someone that lives with what I preach, right?

And so I basically measure how quickly I bounce back to happiness from unhappiness.

We all feel unhappy every now and then because events miss our expectations.

But how quickly can you take an event that missed your expectations and then bounce back to, I can deal with this, right?

For me, on average, and I'm not bragging, this is actual statistics, it's seven seconds, right?

Seven seconds, other than a few times a year where it might be an hour or a day, but regularly, the little things that upset us all the time, they last seven seconds, okay?

And seven seconds because I go through a flow chart.

And the flow chart is very straightforward.

 Can I accept it and do something despite its presence?