I feel like you're not going to like it.

It doesn't matter if I like it.

I'm not like one of those insecure boyfriends that's going to be like, no, don't wear that.

That's too much on Halloween.

Like, do your thing.

Are you sure?

What do you think?

You think it's too sexy?

No, it's not too much.

It's, uh, I don't know.

I thought it was too sexy.

It's just digging up a little bit of past trauma.

And, uh...

This is digging up past trauma.

Stop.

Babe, what?

So, growing up, I had a pet bunny.

You know, when I was three.

Yeah.

So, this isn't too sexy for you?

It's that your bunny died.

You know, out of respect for Theodore, I don't think I'm cool with that costume.

I'm sorry.

I didn't know.

Don't be sorry.

It's my fault for not telling you.

I should have said something, but, you know, a little bit of respect for Theo, yeah.

Big part of my life.

You've been a bad boy.

Do you like it?

I love it.

It's just that I'm a little bit worried about the Stolen Valor accusations.

Stolen Valor accusations?

It's sexy, but is it sexy enough to, like, impersonate a federal officer?

Nobody cares.

It's a costume.

I'm on your side.

I mean, it's me and you versus the freaking world, man.

I'm talking about they.

They?

Oh, the collective they.

Yeah.

I mean, the attendees of Kyle's party, society at large.

Are you sure you're not just being a little insecure?

You think guys will come up to me at the party turning themselves in?

I think it's great.

I think you're sexy.

Oh, my goodness.

My girlfriend, the sexy cop.

But you're going to walk in there, and people are going to be like, Hey, this girl has no respect for the American judicial system.

What now?

I just watched Jaws for the first time.

I'm going to have night terrors, and I could freaking kick you in the nose, man, just like they do to those freaking sharks.

What night did you see Jaws?

Last night.

Baby, you know how I feel about education and reform, right?

Everybody loves the sexy schoolgirls.

Everybody's walking to the party with a giant sign on their head that says, Keep marginalizing the children, Mr. Government.

I mean, that's bad.

This is the top seller at Party City.

Check me out.

I'm allergic to cats.

You know that.

I think you're allergic to me looking good.

Really bad look for the future girl bosses of America.

You're basically saying, I think that women belong on the sidelines, while the big, strong men are on the field.

One, two, three, four.

My boyfriend is insecure.

A little too much wrist?

The other people are going to say, Hey, she doesn't care about the environment.

That's not fair to you.

The straws are made of paper.

Paper's made by lumberjacks.

I'm helping with the straws.

You get sexy, you look great.

Death sentence.

Not something to take lightly.

I think you're locked up in your feelings.

This is the one.

I can feel it.

Go for it.

There's just one problem.

I think that...

Am I appropriating vampire culture?

No, in fact, I actually...

Am I setting a bad example for the young female vampires of America?

No, I actually really like it.

I'm re-triggering your PTSD from when you had a childhood trauma.

It's you're allergic to vampires.

I actually would prefer if...

Newsflash, you don't have to keep lying to me and pretending that you're the super cool boyfriend who doesn't care what his girlfriend wears on Halloween.

Just say it with your chest, okay?

You are really insecure, and you're upset because I'm a solid 10, and you are like a 6 on a good hair day.

I don't see any need to bring the point scale into this.

I feel like that's a little low.

I still want this hot mama letting the girls hang out in public.

Just admit it.

Okay.

Can't wear my sexy costume.

It's too sexy.

I'm going to order one of those giant inflatable things, and he'll say nothing.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Babe?

Oh, this isn't good.

I didn't even know it existed.

How is that real?

Babe?

Oh, I'm so sorry.

Oh, baby.

I'm so sorry.

You can totally be the vampire.

You mean it?

Yeah.