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  • >>> BUT THE THING I WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE WHOLE WORLD

  • IS A BIKE. LOVE, CANE.

  • >> HO HO HO, WHAT A GOOD BOY. LET'S GET HIM THAT BIKE, AND A

  • HELMET. >> GOOD THINKING, SANTA.

  • >> HERE'S ONE FROM EMILY. "DEAR SANTA, THIS YEAR I WANT

  • A DISNEY PRINCESS MIRROR." >> THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT SHE'LL

  • GET, HUH? WHO'S NEXT?

  • RUPERT? >> UM.

  • >> RUPERT, WHAT IS IT? >> IT'S JUST MINE'S A LITTLE

  • WEIRD. >> I'M SURE IT'S NOT THAT WEIRD.

  • JUST READ IT. >> UM, OKAY.

  • WELL, IT STARTS NORMAL ENOUGH. DEAR SANTA --

  • DEAR SANTA, I CAN'T BELIEVE THE YEAR IS ALMOST OVER

  • IT'S GETTING COLDER I'M A YEAR OLDER

  • BUT I'M STILL YOUR SOLDIER ♪ ♪ YOU'RE MY HERO

  • CAUSE YOU ALWAYS BRING ME THE ASSIST

  • SO ONCE AGAIN WE'RE BACK TO ZERO

  • HERE WE GO MY CHRISTMAS LIST

  • ♪ I WON'T BE GREEDY OR NEEDY

  • OR ASK YOU FOR TOO MUCH

  • JUST WANT ONE THING AND HOPE YOU STILL GOT THAT

  • MAGIC TOUCH ♪ ♪ CAUSE GETTING THIS

  • PRESENT IS THE ONLY THING KEEPING ME ALIVE

  • DEAR SANTA CLAUS PLEASE BRING ME A PS5 ♪

  • ♪ I TRIED TO BUY ONE AT A WAL-MART RAN AROUND

  • THE SHOPPING MALL LIKE PAUL BLART

  • TRIED TO FINE ONE FOR SALE

  • BUT THE THING IS THAT THEY'RE ALL OUT

  • YO I EVEN WENT TO A GAME STOP AND

  • THEN I WAS LIKE OH WAIT STOP SANTA CLAUS

  • CAN MAKE ONE ♪ ♪ THE MAN GOT HIS

  • OWN WORKSHOP ♪ ♪ I KNOW YOU PROBABLY

  • HEAR THIS EVERY DAY BUT YOU GOT A COOL HAT

  • ♪ I LOVE THAT MOVIE YOU DID WITH WILL FERRELL

  • MAN ELF WAS PHAT ♪ ♪ ANYWAYS I LOVE

  • THE THINGS YOU DO DON'T FORGET

  • BRING MY GIFT TRULY YOURS

  • I BELIEVE IN YOU THIS IS STU ♪ ♪♪♪

  • DEAR SANTA I NOTICE YOU NEVER

  • WROTE ME A LETTER BACK ♪ ♪ THAT'S FINE DOG

  • EXCEPT NOT REALLY I THINK THAT'S KIND OF WHACK

  • IF YOU CAN'T HELP YOUR BIGGEST

  • FAN THEN YOU SHOULD JUST RETIRE

  • OR NEXT TIME YOU SLIDE DOWN MY CHIMNEY

  • I'LL SET YOUR ASS ON FIRE

  • JUST PLAYING I STILL LOVE YOU

  • MY GIRL THINKS THAT I'M OBSESSED

  • ♪ I EVEN GOT A TATTOO OF YOUR NAME

  • ACROSS MY CHEST ♪ ♪ JUST BRING THAT PS5 BRO

  • IF IT'S THE ONLY THING YOU DO SINCERELY YOURS, STU

  • PS WE SHOULD LIVE TOGETHER TOO

  • STU IS WAITING FOR HIS SURPRISE

  • TO OPEN UP A PS5 ♪ ♪ HE JUST REALLY WANTS

  • TO PLAY ASSASIN'S CREED ON CHRISTMAS DAY

  • BUT HE CAN'T BUY IT TO OPEN UP A PS5 ♪

  • HE JUST REALLY WANTS TO PLAY ASSASIN'S CREED

  • ON CHRISTMAS DAY ♪ ♪ BUT HE CAN'T BUY IT

  • HIMSELF BECAUSE HE LOST HIS JOB BECAUSE HE WAS STEALING

  • FROM HIS BOSS ♪ ♪ I'D BE WORRIED

  • HE'S A SCARY GUY, A SCARY GUY ♪ >> SPECIAL DELIVERY.

  • ♪♪♪ ♪ DEAR MISTER HOLLY JOLLY

  • TWO-FACED SON OF A BITCH ♪ ♪ I HOPE YOU CRASH YOUR SLEIGH

  • AND WIND UP FACEDOWN IN A DITCH

  • ♪ I GUESS EVEN THE GREAT SAINT NICK

  • CAN'T TRACK DOWN A PS5 ♪ ♪ HEY SANTA I DRANK

  • A FIFTH OF EGGNOG DARE ME TO DRIVE

  • YOU RUINED CHRISTMAS I WISH I NEVER TOLD YOU

  • WHAT WAS ON MY WISHLIST ♪ ♪ SCREW YOU, YOUR ELVES

  • YOUR STUPID BEARD AND YOUR BITCH TITS

  • SO THIS'LL BE MY LAST LETTER

  • I KNOW YOU'LL MISS ME WHEN I'M GONE

  • SINCERELY YOURS STU

  • LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, SIR ELTON JOHN

  • THIS YEAR'S CHRISTMAS WILL BE BAD

  • CAUSE SANTA CLAUS WILL BE ♪ ♪ HE ALREADY ASKED YOU

  • VERY NICELY AND NOW HE'S REALLY

  • PISSED OFF ♪ ♪ I'M JUST TELLING YOU

  • 'CAUSE I LIKE YOU A LOT I'M A BIG FAN OF SANTA CLAUS

  • AND I ALSO WANT A PS5

  • A PS5 ♪

  • >> SANTA, THIS IS SERIOUS. >> DON'T PANIC.

  • DON'T PANIC. >> I'M FREAKING OUT!

  • [ SCREAMING ] >> ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT!

  • I THINK IT'S TIME I WRITE A LETTER BACK TO STU.

  • DEAR STU, I THINK YOU GOT THE WRONG ADDRESS

  • BRO ♪ ♪ I'M NOT SANTA CLAUS

  • BYE-BYE. ♪♪♪

  • THAT'S CRAZY. A PS5?

  • I DIDN'T EVEN ASK FOR THIS. I GUESS SHADY MUST HAVE BEEN A

  • GOOD BOY THIS YEAR. SORRY, STU.

  • YOU [ BLEEP ] UP.

>>> BUT THE THING I WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE WHOLE WORLD

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