Name: Career Day - SNL
Uploaded: 2024-02-02T16:02:44.000Z
Duration: 4 min 59 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

>>> AND IN MY OPINION, THAT'S HOW WE MAKE THE FIRE GO AWAY.

>> OH, WOW, THANK YOU WOW. TO CONTINUE OUR CAREER DAY

PRESENTATIONS, WE'LL TURN IT OVER TO MALIKAY'S FATHER.

DADS ARE OLD. >> I DON'T KNOW, HE'S A DAD.

>> I'M LOOKING AT YOU, GEEZ. >> ALL RIGHT.

MR. PARNASSUS, WHY DON'T YOU TELL US ABOUT WHAT YOU DO FOR A

IMPORTANCE. FOR 82 YEARS, I HAVE BEEN AN OIL

NOW WHAT DOES AN OIL BARREN DO? AND THE ANSWER?

CRUSH YOUR ENEMIES. GRIND THEIR BONES INTO DIRT.

>> OH, SICK! >> WOW, RIGHT INTO THE DIRT.

SO, IF THE KIDS WANT TO PURSUE A CAREER IN OIL, WHAT KINDA TRAITS

WOULD SERVE THEM WELL? >> WELL, OIL IS NOT FOR THE

>> LOOK AT HIM, MORDECAI. >> DAD, THIS IS EMBARRASSING.

BUSINESS, IT MUST BE PRETTY LUCRATIVE, RIGHT?

>> OIL HAS LITTLE TO DO WITH PROFIT, MA'AM.

ALLOW ME TO DEMONSTRATE. CHILDREN, POINT TO THE WEAKEST

IN YOUR CLASS, AND WE SHALL RUIN THEIR SPIRIT, AS I'VE RUINED THE

UNDERSTAND THE PAIN. YOU THINK I WAS ALWAYS THE

PICTURE OF STRENGTH I AM NOW? >> NO, DAD, YOU COULDN'T GET OUT

OF BED FOR A WEEK 'CAUSE THE MATTRESS WAS TOO SOFT.

>> MIND OVER FLESH, BOY. I WAS BORN SEVEN MONTHS TOO

IN IT'S INFANCY. SO, THEY PLACED ME INTO A CAST

IRON POT INSIDE A PIZZA OVEN UNTIL I WAS RIPE ENOUGH TO WALK.

MY BONES NEVER HARDENED, BUT MY SPIRIT DID.

>> WELL, THIS HAS BEEN OUTSTANDING, MR. PARNASSUS, BUT

UNFORTUNATELY WE ARE STARTING TO RUN OUT OF TIME.

QUESTIONS FOR MORDECAI'S DAD? >> YEAH, YEAH.

I GET THAT YOU'RE AN OIL BARREN, BUT WHAT DO YOU ACTUALLY DO?

>> SO, PERHAPS I WAS NOT CLEAR. LUCKILY, I BROUGHT A VISUAL AID

WHICH WILL ILLUMINATE THE INS AND OUTS OF THE OIL INDUSTRY.

>> THIS DEAD BIRD REPRESENTS THOSE WHO WILL WISH YOU ILL.

ONCE PROUD, FLYING HIGH ABOVE THE EARTH IN BLOODY DEFIANCE OF

HER 50 GIFTS AND NOW YOU WILL THROW HER DOWN, NOCED AND

FILLED HER BELLY WITH MY FESTERING SEED AND SIRED A BOY.

HE IS MY FATEFUL REVENGE, H.R. >> DAD, COME ON.

I WAS ASKED TO BRING A HEALTHY SNACK, SO JOIN ME IN THE HALL

FOR SWINE LIVERS AND CAPRI SUNS. >> ALL RIGHT, KIDS.

GO OUT AND EAT THOSE PIG GUTS. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

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Career Day - SNL

demonstrate

regret

pursue

ruin