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  • but mommy, I don't want to pet the hippos out of bed recruit.

  • Uh now on your feet, but I don't have any feet.

  • You better grow some fast or else or else what?

  • You'll sock me?

  • No, actually I'll put a foot so far up your booty, you'll be able to taste it.

  • Oh look, I have no idea why you're here.

  • Read it and weep son, You sign on the dotted line for boot camp.

  • Oh so I'm guessing it's not a summer camp where we design and create fashionable footwear.

  • No.

  • Ah well I guess I have no choice but to step up and hell with it.

  • No laughing in boot camp.

  • Oh my God, I don't know what I've been told.

  • I don't know.

  • But I've been told Gazpacho is best served cold.

  • This would be easier if we rolled back in formation recruit.

  • Sorry sir.

  • I thought you'd get a kick out of it.

  • I don't know.

  • But it's been said, I don't know.

  • But it's been said Orange will run until he turns red.

  • Not if I use this segue instead.

  • Orange, that's it.

  • 20 pushups now.

  • Yes, drill sergeant sir.

  • Hmm, wow, you're, you're, you're actually doing it.

  • Most recruits fail that test because they have no arms.

  • 20 uh my peng is tired.

  • Oh yeah, is it tired?

  • Well the rest of your body is about to be even more tired because we've just arrived at the obstacle course obstacle course where I don't see any obstacle.

  • Wait, what's happening?

  • Is he actually enjoying the obstacle course?

  • Hey, Hey drill sergeant.

  • Thanks for showing me the ropes.

  • Well this can't be, no one's ever had fun while doing the obstacle course.

  • My God.

  • Mm this is incredible slow motion.

  • He's gonna do it.

  • Bullseye Orange.

  • You, you set a course record.

  • Well, yeah, of course I did.

  • Oh really get it course because it was an obstacle course.

  • Yes, I get it.

  • My bad.

  • Of course you do.

  • Orange.

  • Listen to me.

  • You have real talent.

  • You can make one heck of a soldier.

  • We just need to work on that attitude.

  • Why is it not positive enough?

  • Yeah.

  • What is this?

  • You're doing prop comedy all of a sudden you're an orange, not a carrot top.

  • Come on.

  • Who me?

  • Of course not.

  • This isn't funny.

  • I beg to swiffer.

  • That is the worst joke I've ever heard in my entire life and I once sat through a Yakov Smirnoff concert.

  • Really worse than dish one.

  • Listen to me.

  • Well, how about this No enough with the props.

  • Orange.

  • I've been doing this a long time.

  • I've molded many young foods into warriors, but your skills are truly special.

  • I've been told I'm special many times.

  • Yeah, I believe it.

  • Here's my point.

  • Whichever path you'd like to take in the armed services, you can do it.

  • So what will it be?

  • Army, Navy, Marines, Coast Guard.

  • I'm probably more of an Air Force guy.

  • Orange.

  • Look, if you're serious about the Air Force.

  • Here's what your path is gonna look like we'll start you at any one but you'll make N.

  • C.

  • O.

  • At five after three years.

  • T.

  • I.

  • S in six months.

  • T.

  • I G assuming you've got the W.

  • A.

  • P.

  • S.

  • Points within the A.

  • F.

  • S.

  • C.

  • You'll eventually make S.

  • N.

  • C.

  • O.

  • At E.

  • Seven and head to the A.

  • F.

  • S.

  • N.

  • C.

  • O.

  • A.

  • Huh?

  • The Af S.

  • N.

  • C.

  • O.

  • A.

  • It's C.

  • C A.

  • F.

  • Affiliated.

  • Oh now once you're out of the A.

  • F.

  • S.

  • N.

  • C.

  • O.

  • A.

  • Your options really open up.

  • Oh could I go into the A.

  • B.

  • C.

  • D.

  • E.

  • F.

  • G.

  • I am not familiar with that acronym.

  • Maybe the L.

  • F.

  • M.

  • A.

  • O.

  • Could they teach me how to fly a raffle copter?

  • I think I see what's happening here.

  • Oh I got it.

  • Seriously.

  • I'll go into the PCD PCD.

  • I'm pretty sure that's native.

  • No way.

  • It's the prop comedy division and it's definitely Air Force.

  • Yeah that's it.

  • I tried taking it easy on you Orange.

  • I really did.

  • But you've left me no choice but to deliver on my promises from earlier to put a foot so far up your booty you'll be able to taste it.

  • Oh goody.

  • You remembered?

  • Huh remembered what?

  • Oh come on leave the poor guy alone.

  • Go on shoo shoo get it.

  • Oh too tight.

  • Too tight.

  • Hey hey question for you drill sergeant?

  • I'm busy right now.

  • Would you?

  • Shut up.

  • But back to my question, what does it taste like?

  • I swear the minute they untie me, I'm gonna what I honestly want to know with all my soul.

  • Well, I'm not telling you.

  • Well, I don't know, but I've been told the dirty socks probably taste like mold.

  • Oh, hey, what the heck was that for?

  • Oh, oh my God, this guy's insane kicking ball.

  • Why is he doing this?

  • My guess is he's doing it just because he can, Oh, prop comedy again.

  • Yeah, I'd rather go back to getting slammed repeatedly into a wall, okay, as you dish.

but mommy, I don't want to pet the hippos out of bed recruit.

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