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  • that was terrible.

  • You are about to enter the courtroom of judge walter, winchell waffle.

  • The foods are real, the cases are real, the rulings are final.

  • This is judge waffle.

  • Blueberry pancake is suing his former friend squash for the cost of cosmetic surgery after squash supposedly fell on top of him without warning.

  • All rise.

  • Simon didn't say okay, Simon says all rise, judge waffle.

  • This is case number A.

  • O The matter of pancake versus squash parties have been sworn in, be seated.

  • Simon says be seated and you guys are quick studies mr pancake What exactly happened the other day?

  • I was just sitting there being awesome as usual.

  • Then suddenly this squash fell out of the sky and squished me messed me up something fierce.

  • You know you look fine to me was the accident.

  • Really that bad your honor before the accident.

  • I was a blue berry muffin.

  • Whoa!

  • That's flat out crazy!

  • Well it certainly seems you're entitled to the money.

  • What do you have to say squash?

  • But it wasn't me, it was the one armed man convincing testimony.

  • Perhaps we should be looking for this one armed man, wait a second.

  • You're seriously rethinking your ruling because he blamed some imaginary one armed man fan and I'm a pancake your honor.

  • You're right pancake judgment for the plaintiff in the amount of your honor.

  • It was the one armed man.

  • Oh that's right.

  • I had forgotten about the one armed man Orange.

  • What is going on?

  • This must be your first trial with judge waffle.

  • He's one heck of a waffler.

  • Okay squash is guilty.

  • No, wait not guilty but probably guilty.

  • I just don't know, I see.

  • Why did he become a judge if he can't make up his mind?

  • Probably because he gets to hit stuff with his cool hammer Orange, stop it.

  • Simon says stop it man, my only weakness.

  • Alright before I can reach a decision, I'm going to need to see some evidence, your honor.

  • This is exhibit a my before and after photos.

  • You could be on a slim fast commercial exhibit B A rendering of what I'll look like after the plastic surgeon does his thing.

  • God, it's you like that ladies.

  • It's the chin of Gourd Clooney.

  • Wait a minute.

  • You're not just trying to frame squash or you can get a new chin, are you?

  • I think I'm going to side with squash on this one, no, no, no, I'm the victim here, a valid point in that case.

  • I guess I should find squash guilty, but it wasn't me, it was the one armed man.

  • Yes, it was the one armed man.

  • You gotta believe me.

  • No one armed man, look out, he's got his squashing gavel, try and get out of the way.

  • Maybe I'll stay here, but here's too dangerous, but if I move, maybe he'll miss me, what do I do?

  • Why can't this?

  • Oh man, that was an awful lot of waffle, waffling.

  • Hey, what's the matter?

  • Don't you like my joke?

  • Simon says laugh now.

  • That's batter adjourned.

  • Seriously, I hated that carton.

  • I felt like my butt was turning into jam.

  • Are you even listening to me?

  • Sorry, I can't hear a word over that guy.

  • Hey, hey berry boys.

  • Hey, what, what is it?

  • Who would, I don't know.

  • What is up squash?

  • Did you guys start?

  • What's up without me?

  • Yo yo yo Oh would you stop it?

  • Hey, did somebody say, shut up.

  • This is what you do with your time.

  • I don't even have the words for how stupid this is guys.

  • What if he's right?

  • What if this whole, what's up?

  • Schtick is getting old.

  • Whoa!

  • Sounds like you need, whoa, why?

  • What?

  • Why zip, zip.

  • The only known substance with more energy per ounce than zoom, prepare yourself for a new dimension of intensity.

  • Zoom is now, this is great, I'm covered in zoom juice.

  • Does anybody else feel kind of weird?

  • Uh, sticky count is weird.

  • Weird.

  • I don't feel weird.

  • I feel great.

  • I feel awesome.

  • I feel like, hey, strawberry, Hey orange, what is it squash, wow!

  • Hello, gather around fruit lovers for today is an extra special episode of how to It is Yes.

  • Can you not tell from the fancy decor in my bubble pipe?

  • I just feel like some of our, how to episodes have been a bit well.

  • Lowbrow, so whatever today's prompt is we're going to do it right, we're gonna be educational and we're gonna be classy about so I shouldn't have put that whoopee cushion under your chair.

  • Let's just get to the prompt and let's be classy about it today.

  • Orange and I will show you how to squash pear.

  • What wow.

  • Good thing you moved.

  • This episode would have been shorter than your chair is, wow, this is not how this episode was supposed to go.

  • We already started so we might as well make the best of it when life gives you lemons.

  • Make lemon juice.

  • Hey, that's not how the saying, wow, sorry, wow, things really went sour for old lemon.

  • Now then option one for squashing pair, trick him into standing directly underneath squash.

  • I found that book you like, oh yeah, nice try orange.

  • I'm not gonna fall for that.

  • I'll just stand over here in the shade man.

  • You're too smart for me.

  • Wait a minute.

  • Why is the shade getting smaller?

  • Gosh, you're hard to squash.

  • Guess it's on the option to get creative believe it or not.

  • There are other things capable of squashing parrot besides squash, like bookshelves and hammers, relax pear.

  • I promise you're perfectly safe.

  • Really because I feel like my life's been at risk.

  • This entire video, huh?

  • In the end.

  • If fair winds up being too evasive, you'll have no other choice than option three.

  • No one to give up you win pair.

  • We'll do this the classy way, come, have a drink, sit down in the shade.

  • You've earned it.

  • Yeah, no kidding.

  • I swear the things I put myself through, just for the sake of entertaining.

  • Wait the shade Circus Afro Circus Afro Circus.

  • Afro polka dot, polka dot polka dot afro Now, that's what this circus needs.

  • Look at that.

  • Zebra go, well, I did tell you that rainbow wigs are the wave of the future he's hired now, who do we have next?

  • Techno lemurs.

  • I love techno lemurs, so I should just put down.

  • Yes, Now we can only find a bear on a tricycle.

  • We'll take her three for three.

  • These are the best auditions ever.

  • Absolutely, we're going to be a hit now, all we need is one more big act, the grand finale.

  • Who's next?

  • Hey, sorry we're late, but there was an elephant in the carpool lane.

  • Good thing.

  • Our trunk is bigger than his.

  • Alright, alright, stop your clowning around and we'll uh start your clowning around.

  • Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, novelty toys and that creepy looking candy guy, prepare yourselves for the greatest show on earth.

  • Witness the feats that only fruits can perform.

  • First up, our little lumber Jack of all trades midget.

  • Don't worry folks, I love to multi acts.

  • Yes, I knew I should've juggled hippopotamuses instead.

  • Our next performer is never on time.

  • But don't worry, he's worth the, wait, f Y.

  • I were not a package deal?

  • I'm totally down with freelancing.

  • I'm not sure which one is the dumbbell Next.

  • Oh, do you know what's light, fluffy and 50ft up in the air.

  • What?

  • Oh, into the cloud, it's marshmallow and don't forget the master acrobat squash guys, I feel dizzy.

  • Okay wow, that really is a compact car Next.

  • Our final act is a mythical based beyond imagination, part fruit, part wild animal.

  • It's the one, it's the only right Hey, stop look guys, you're not cut out for this.

  • Okay, we need something fresh, something hot, something nobody's ever seen before, something like like that.

  • Now that's what I'm talking about.

  • Everybody loves techno levers.

  • You see that fellas that's what I'm talking about, I think you can give old big top what he's looking for.

  • Are you kidding?

  • We've always wanted to wake out hot dog.

  • This is it the thing finale you guys are gonna be starred, this is fantastic.

  • But what happened to your friend squad?

  • That was terrible.

  • Whoa, looks like we're not the only one to catch a break.

  • Ah It's your boy little apple today, me and the whole gang are doing the roast yourself.

  • Challenge the what yourself Who now the roast yourself challenge, you know what that is?

  • Right?

  • Um It doesn't involve setting your butt on fire, does it squash?

  • What are you talking about?

  • We're just gonna make fun of ourselves, You make fun of ourselves, it's super easy.

  • You just put on a beat and you do a diss track about yourself.

  • I'll go first, I promise, I'll keep it short for your sake?

  • Little apple.

  • It's the roast yourself challenge dude.

  • Alright, alright, alright.

  • Alright.

  • I'm orange people sometimes say I'm annoying my own best friends.

  • They rarely enjoy me my teeth.

  • I don't, I don't speak to my crushing jokes on my defense mechanism.

  • Yeah, that was perfect.

  • Orange squash.

  • You understand now?

  • Um, I guess, but why would you make fun of yourself dude, It's fun.

  • Here, watch this.

  • Uh, pear.

  • I'm oblong.

  • I'm green and I'm boring unlike orange.

  • My fans aren't exactly adoring.

  • I'd love to read books and cat juggy books and when I talk too long I leave everyone snoring.

  • What you guys think?

  • Really?

  • You guys, we were just joking.

  • Well grandpa Lemon wasn't so squash.

  • You ready to roast yourself?

  • I don't know if you guys would like it.

  • Yeah.

  • Dude, give it a spin.

  • Okay.

  • Here it goes.

  • Name is squash.

  • I only do one thing and that thing is to morning it's evening.

  • It's, but I'm not one trick pony cause I also came.

  • How was that?

  • Sorry about all the murder and destruction.

  • I tried to warn you.

  • Okay, maybe someone else should go.

  • I have a secret that I have never told.

  • Finally tell that was your deep dark secret that you have difficulty rhyming time to bring it on.

  • Cutie.

  • I'm tiny.

  • I compensate with monster trucks and likely can't breathe.

  • I'll keep this brief take like a week where jump scares me and sit down.

  • Oh cool.

  • Since I'm from the chocolate outside and the creamy inside, I'm probably the best cookie ever invented.

  • Whoa.

  • Thanks for filling me in, wow.

  • Never heard that one before.

  • Hey, Hey, oreo.

  • What squash what's a squash?

  • Whoa, Not crumble up again.

  • Hey, hey squash squash e hey, what what is it?

  • You can't squash this.

  • You don't even want to squash you, You can't watch this.

  • I actually like you, you can't squash this my friend squash squashes so hard.

  • God thank you for blessing me with the rind.

  • So find these two right feels good.

  • You know your round and you know that squash can't pound you down on the fan.

  • You guys watch this.

  • You guys watch this squash, anybody.

  • You can't squash this.

  • Every time you see squashing squashing, he means it brought the lead and he gives bananas.

  • Even though he squashes live, even though he tries to squash me every time I ride I'm fast that I am fresh.

  • I'm orange.

  • I'm orange.

  • I'm orange.

  • I'm orange.

  • Yes, watch this.

  • You can't watch this.

  • You can't watch this.

  • What about go squash?

  • Your really crushing it?

  • You okay squash, You look like you're coming down with something.

  • You must be an artist because you're a real splatter painter.

  • Yeah, yes.

that was terrible.

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